People telling you what their dogs are ‘saying’

[chestylarue52]

Lighthearted thread but still, I think I have unreasonable levels of anger about this

Most recent example being by a lake relaxing with friends when couple with three dogs come along, we are chatting to the woman of the couple while the dogs are jumping in the lake, playing with their toys etc.

Man of the couple is providing loud commentary of what the dogs are doing by means of

“Oooo he says! He says, Mum it’s cold in here!! Ooo I’m getting out now, he says, where’s that ball, he says!”

“I didn’t expect it to be that cold he says!!”

I know IABU but I wanted to drown him

Dog has the voice of a young David Copperfield.

He talks to me all the time!

I talk to my dog all the time 🙈 she has a Geordie accent when she replies 🤣

Love these! Especially 'just checking my pee mails!'

You wouldn't like us and our rabbits then...(Sometimes the annoying magpie outside joins in too).

There’s an ongoing debate in our house as to whether our Border Terrier has a gruff Glaswegian accent (what I hear) or a jaunty Cockernee one (what DH hears). I think he’s just messing with us by putting on fake accents.

I was going to come here and defend people who talk to their dogs (I do) but then I saw the conversation

That's a bit extreme. I tend to just go with "She's telling me she wants to go out/hasn't been fed (usually a lie)/wants to play"

I have never attributed a voice to either of my dogs, but maybe I should listen for one ;)

You’re missing out steph

Woof woof woof woof

Translation - you are being unreasonable!!!

Our dog says I wuff you constantly especially when we are eating! Also she has a secret life as a police dog even though she's tiny! Every morning she tells us what she's been up to!

When I gaze into my cat’s sleepy blinky eyes I sometimes think she must be looking at me thinking (in actual cat language obviously) “what on Earth are you on, love?”

Ah Jonny Morris tv was good back then!

Mummy they took it off because talking animals went out of vogue apparently! I beg to differ! Might have to rewatch dr Doolittle when I have a slight hangover this Sunday

Hahaha! I've found my people right here the cat definitely swears more than the dog and the dogs an opinionated fucker.
I wonder if people have been translating for their pets throughout history. I bet they have 😂

One of my Sprockers has an Australian sheep shearer's cobber accent, and the other is slightly Suffolk. I am bat shit dog crazy, but dog talk is strictly kept at home, unlike highly annoying colleague who regales us all (constantly) with speech from her menagerie. In meetings. Aghhhh!! 🐩🐩

Brilliant thread. Love the peemails.

Ugh, speaking for an animal would drive me mad. I talk to my dog eg is that water cold, aren't you a good dog etc, I'd never speak for him. It's a bit weird and I'm a crazy dog/horse owner.

Theycould how can talking animals go out of vogue? Just another indication in the decline of modern society! Hope it’s the proper dr Doolittle ie Rex Harrison none of that Eddie Murphy rubbish!

The man is fit not the dog, although the dog is very cute

custardy

Yes I do that too. Anything I actually want, I pretend the dog wants. The dog wants to go to the pub a lot.

@WhyDidIEatThat

Yes, we have similar conversations, my piss taking spooky horse and I.

"WTF is THAT?!"
"It's a tree"
"It's a horse EATING tree!"
"It's the same fucking tree you see every day"
"Its gonna eat me - its gonna eat me..." Repeated in a high pitch with dramatic snorts and bouncing on the spot for effect.
All in a slightly neurotic tone from dhorse

Bus and what a clever horse you have alerting you to the fact there’s a horse eating tree in the vicinity. Thymelord im starting to think our dogs an alholohic the amount of time she wants to spend in the pub. She also loves holidays

Love this, sorry OP!

Fab Buswankeress

My Grumpy DDog (female) would have an aggressive scottish accent and regularly tell everyone to fuck off, if she could talk anyway!

Dopey DDog (male) is scared of everything and would speak like Scooby Doo in my mind. DS and I regularly have chats about what they would be saying

Dopey DDog: whats that! Aaargh its a piece of floating fluff! Its going to kill me!

Grumpy DDog : FFFS you idiot, its nothing to worry about!

I can tell exactly what my cats are thinking and "saying".

"Ooh you got any cat food?"
"Where's the cat food?"
"Give me the cat food"
"Is it time for my cat food yet?"

Thanks for the clarification about fit man 😄

I'm not a dog person but I would love this. Totally batshit.