I really really REALLY don't want a c-section

[SaffronSands]

More of an AIB unrealistic as opposed to AIB unreasonable.

I'm pregnant with my first. Pregnancy hasn't gone the way I wanted it to (of course we all want it to go smoothly, so far it has been far less than smooth and very, very scary).

I am desperate to have a natural birth. Absolutely do not want a section (unless of course I have to for the safety of the baby). I hear that things such as epidural and the type of hospital you birth in can make a difference. I can't give birth in midwife led unit sadly but still have time to choose a different hospital.

Both times I've had a local I've been quite sick afterwards. The idea of surgery of course is not one I enjoy, as I have quite a fear of it and had a bad experience with a complicated appendectomy when I was younger.

So whilst I know that a section may be necessary for safety reasons, is there anything I can do to to reduce my chances of needing one?

Never done this before or felt so out of control in my life.

There's nothing you can do to avoid it but an emergency section will be done only if your baby's distressed and, trust me, if that happens you won't care. I hope you get your vaginal birth.

I'm about to be Not Helpful- but, looking back now, I wish I'd opted for sections!

My pregnancies were 'normal', my labours were protracted but 'normal (14 hours and 18 hours); but, 20 years later , I pee when I sneeze.

I recognise that it's considered 'better' for babies to be born naturally, and that there are risks associated with sections, as there are for natural deliveries! But, in retrospect, I think that if you have support in place for the first few weeks, your body ultimately recovers more completely from a C section than from a long, painful labour, complete with some tearing and when it came down to it, a useless epidural!

Unfortunately birth is very unpredictable, and I don't think there's anything you can do to reduce your chances of needing a C-section if such an emergency situation arose.

Is it worth speaking to your midwife about your anxieties and get her to explain to you what happens in a C-section and what your options are re: anaesthetics etc if a section was necessary, to help you feel more in control and understanding of what is happening in the event a C-section was necessary?

@Bluelady I've heard that giving birth in certain hospitals, choosing not to have an epidural, delaying being induced if possible, staying home for as long as possible etc etc can help reduce the chance of needing a section. I just don't know what to believe or what not to. I need to speak to my midwife really but not seeing her again for another few weeks.

However, I really should add that I am a pragmatist- I wasn't looking for whale music, pan-pipes and breeeeathiiing through the 'sting' of contractions and transition.

I just wanted them out and both of us safe and sound.

I ended up having an emergency c-section when I had DS as he was a big baby and my Labour had gone on for nearly 40 hours!

Although it's not what I would have chosen, it was ok. I had a general anaesthetic so perhaps that's something you can discuss with your midwife/consultant of you would feel better with that?

The recovery was longer but wasn't that bad - I went home after 48 hours and was ok around the house. Managed short trips out after the first week and was driving again 6 weeks after birth. I also started going to groups etc once I could drive again.

Best of luck with your birth!

You don't get any choice how your birth goes so in my opinion go into labour with a strong understanding of all possibilities and eventualities so whatever the outcome you understand and can make informed choices where possible.

Ultimately healthy baby trumps anything else so you might find yourself grateful for a life saving c section.

Don't get my wrong, in an emergency situation I would absolutely have one. I would never put my child at risk unnecessarily.

I was just wondering if there was anything I could do to reduce my chances.

Saffron- with respect, have you considered the idea that you might be crying out for an epidural, and possibly a section 'come the time'? And that you don't want to stay out of the hospital/birthing unit too late or the options-door may swing shut on you and your preferences?

@Mayhemmumma of course I would be grateful and would never argue against it in a genuine emergency.

Please do try to resolve this in your mind before the birth. There really isn't anything you can do to control it.. In my case I simply never dilated enough. It makes me sad when friends who've had Cs say it affected their bond and they feel they failed in some way. I felt v happy that I had a healthy baby, was still alive and that my bits were intact! I recovered straightforwardly from. The Cs and had far fewer problems than some friends who had assisted vaginal births. What happens happens.. The important thing is that you are both well and safe. They don't use local anaesthesia, it's a spinal block. Try and talk this through with your midwife in advance but please try not to put too much on this.. Don't let it take over from the joy of having your first child.. Its just mechanics x

What Huge says.

I'm desperate for a c section this time (2nd baby) because it would be so much calmer (I have severe anxiety) but I've been told that unless it's an emergency they absolutely won't consider it (blood condition) so I'm slightly gutted.

Don't worry about it, what needs to happen will happen, it's all about getting your baby out safely and keeping you both alive at the end of the day.

@Blushah absolutely. I have no idea what will happen. I've just read a lot about how certain things can increase the chances of needing a section and you can reduce the possibility. According to this thread however they are not true. I have no issue with having a section as a concept, genuinely just wanted to know if there was anything I could do to help avoid one. Seems not!

Thanks for advice everyone. Need to work on my anxieties by the looks of things.

I was just wondering if there was anything I could do to reduce my chances

No one here can answer this as we don't know the individual circumstances around your pregnancy, your health and your medical history. I would ask your midwife/consultant this question when you next have an appointment.

I really really really didn’t want a section for a variety of reasons. Unfortunately my second baby had to come by section at 34 weeks.
I asked the anaesthetist for anti emetics so I didn’t feel sick/wasn’t sick
I was worried generally about surgery - it was all fine and a lot less worrying/stressful than I expected
I was concerned about recovery - I was lucky and was off painkillers within two days and beyond some core weakness found the recovery very easy
I was concerned about the catheter (for no particular reason) but again not something I should have wasted time worrying about
These are just the concerns I can remember. I felt so strongly about not wanting a section. But when it came down to it I had no option and my concerns weren’t valid

I’d be cautious of eating your heart so strongly on a certain birth because if it doesn’t happen your disappointment and worries could be detrimental to your mental health at a time when you’re hormonal anyway. So whilst I understand your concerns I’d say the best you can do is address the areas you’re worried about so if it does end up being a section that it’s not the end of the world iyswim

In terms of the things that are within your control that may help you avoid a section -
Aim for an active birth/not laid on a bed (this may mean avoiding epidural if possible as even mobile epidurals affect mobility to a degree. This also may mean refusing the drip/induction as the syntocin drip tends to mean epidural which in turn effects mobility)
If you need continuous monitoring ask for alternatives that don’t impact your mobility (eg wireless monitor)
Maybe look into hypnobirthing - again as a method to help avoid epidural

Finally I’d say there are scenarios that are not as pleasant as an emergency section. So you may want to choose a calm/planned section over increasing interventions/instrumental birth/emergency section. I guess I’m trying to say I’d be cautious of avoiding section at all costs as you may end up with a worse scenario

my first was a 'natural birth' and it was completely horrendous and took a very long time to recover physically and mentally from. Much longer than it wouldve taken to recover from a section. And because I was in labour so long I did end up taking all the drugs and yes they did make me incredibly sick. Dont see how I wouldve got through the three day labour without them however.
You just dont know what you are going to get sadly.
My second was also natural (although i did try and ask for a section) and it was slightly better (faster) but still horrifically painful. It took less time to recover from... probably wouldve taken longer to recover from a section.... so its just a massive gamble! Its different everytime and cant really be predicted.
There are pros and cons to any way of giving birth and if you do end up having a section there will probably be some plus points to that as much as there are negatives.
To be honest I think it all adds up the same in the end whatever way you give birth, unless you have an incredibly tragic time or an incredibly easy time... but both of those are very rare.

*setting your heart. Don’t eat your heart

Thanks @BlueTears - I have severe GAD too but also OCD and struggle with any type of surgery. I feel your pain. Anxiety makes already anxious situations far, far worse!

How can giving birth in a different hospital change whether you have a section?
Our local hospital has a higher proportion of sections but that's because it's a big teaching hospital and more complicated cases are brought there.

I was like that for my first one. Did the whole hypnobirthing schtick (utterly useless when I went into labour) was going to have a blissful natural homebirth. DD was breech and resulted in an EMCS. All the natural birth stuff left me with was a deep sense of failure. Please try to get it straightened out in your head first.

I had a VBAC for my second and it was decidedly meh. No wonderful blissful holistic experience, it was messy and sore and undignified and I couldn’t poo right afterwards for quite a while.

I gave birth in a culture that was very 'natural' delivery and 'breast-feed at all costs'.

I did both, but given my time over again, and seeing as I had the option, I wish I had at least considered a planned C section and the possibility that I wasn't the worst mother on the planet had I augmented DS1's breast-feeding with formula!

We all go in with such good intentions, but I genuinely believe, if you approach it with too rigid a mindset, you set yourself up for guilt and recrimination ( and PTDS...) down the line.

We all went into labour thinking this and that, but few of us had that experience, but the vast majority of us happily ended up with healthy babies (and some of us let out a tiny bit of wee, aged 50, when we sneeze..) .

I'm not sure if this will help or not but I had to have a section with my 4th. I'd previously had very easy labours so I was very reluctant to agree to a section - I only did so because objectively I could see it was the right decision. In the lead up to my section, I was really really hoping that I'd just go into labour naturally and I had a really ridiculous fear that I wouldn't love my baby as much as the other 3 because we wouldn't have the 'bonding experience' of labour.

Anyway the day came, and while it was very odd driving into hospital knowing I was going to have my baby, the experience was no less magical than my previous labours. My heart still skipped a beat when they lifted the baby over the curtain, (indeed my 4th is the only one where I've experienced that "rush of love" that people talk about), dh cut the cord, she was placed on me for skin to skin while they stitched me back up. Lying there staring at my baby while the doctors did their thing is still one of my loveliest memories. I find it weird to look back now & remember how much I didn't want a section- all of my anger about it just dissolved once the baby was here.

Imo the biggest difference is with labour you do the painful bit before the baby gets here (ie the actual labour) & with a section you do it afterwards. I found the first couple of days following hard but not unbearable.

Anyway I'm not sure if this post has been helpful, but I do know exactly how you're feeling.

@MyOtherProfile I just said that that was what I had heard, not that it was true. Hence why I am asking!

Yes I'm trying to work out if it could be true.