AIBU to ask you what you’re funniest autocorrect error is?

[ConfusedWife1234]

Mine corrected were old to werewolf yesterday. I think there must have been also a spelling mistake... because when I write it now it does not correct it.

I was looking for a new puppy as my old dog had just died. I rang the breeder and wanted to say
Have you got a bitch
It changed to how’s your butthole

I use to work with a girl called Rhian, who was a bit grumpy and rather large of body, whenever I emailed her it would autocorrect to Rhino!

DH and I getting a bit, ahem, frisky on the texts.......

I told him I was going to duck his chick

It's now known as that in our house

OH texted me once saying he was in a rush and didn’t know if he had got on the right train.

A little while later, I texted asking where he was. He replied just passed Aberdeen (meant to say Aber which is a small station not far from Cardiff).

I replied you def got in the wrong train if you are in Scotland!

I was emailing a special needs school (I was sendco at another setting at the time) and kind regards became kind retards. Thank God I asked someone to proof read it before I hit send!

A message home to parents (I work in a primary school) word auto corrected wellies to willies!!!!

My friend just told me about one time where she sent a a text to her teenage son and it corrected his name to Cancer. She had typed. "Cancer, call me now".

Group text for a uni friends night out friend I suggested we all go out for a Wild Finger. Maybe when we were still at uni that’s the kind of night out we’d have enjoyed but it seems now we’d prefer to go to the restaurant Wild Ginger.

Best thread ever

I texted a friend to let her know that my husband wasn't very well.
I wanted to say that he was unwell, possibly due to...
Unfortunately, I texted 'dh unwell, possibly die'
I wondered why she rang back so quickly

I once wrote a Facebook post about buying some new bleach (I know...). I posted that I was looking forward to my Muslims being white again

Oh my god!

😂😂😂😂😂

Not an auto-correct but a document typed from a handwritten note that very much appeared to say;

Jason has been wanking hard in the computer room this week

Obviously he had been working - no sperms were seen.

I can't tell you how much this thread has cheered me up XD. I have been crying with laughter at these and my ribs hurt! Just what I needed. THANK YOU, OP!!

Back in the dark ages before word processors, a friend's mum typed up his
PhD thesis and turned 'cosines' into friendlier 'cosiness'. It's not as funny as some of the autocorrects but rather sweet... and a bugger to correct with tippex.

I posted on facebook that my niece was a site. should have been dote. also typed a report about new premises stating that we would need a very large whorehouse.

Came across an internet meme the other day “The man who invented autocorrect will burn in hello“

Ooooh I have one that keeps happening to me and it's driving me nuts

I sell stuff I've made on Etsy, and when I type the titles and descriptions "white" gets autocorrected to "shite"

Somehow I doubt there's much of a market out there for a "rainbow cloud silver wirework suncatcher with shite beading", or even for a "Christmas pudding keyring with sparkly shite cream and holly leaves"

I'm a total spelling fascist as well so it hugely bothers me!

My mum and dad were in New York and he text me to say they were having a great day a were currently on a boar, instead of on a boat. I was in tears at the image of my mum, dad, auntie and her husband on the backs of boars going down the street. 😂😂

I text a friend declaring bondage would be part of her husband's birthday present

I'd actually written "boozage" before autocorrect kindly intervened.

There was also a jiggered/fingered incident

I am howling at some of these, my 1 year old keeps looking at me like I have lost the plot (which tbf I lost years ago)
😂😂

Wank you instead of thank you to my nephew - fortunately noticed before I hit send

My ex had a truly mental hyperactive auto correct. He was texting a client (whose father was ill) and wanted to write 'I hope your dad is doing well'. And it auto corrected to 'I hope your dad is dead'. He caught it in time...

The oldest one in the autocorrect book got me.

Was supposed to be going on a night out with friends and got bad news on the afternoon.

"Sorry, can't come tonight. My cunt just died and I can't stop crying. Let everyone know please"

Bless my friend, never told me. I only discovered it months later when cleaning out my sent folder. We had a good laugh about but still embarrassing.

I had added cunt to my old Nokia phone's dictionary, that might have been unwise in retrospect.