Has anyone ever had a mammogram or smear by a male nurse?

[strawberrisc]

Just posting here for traffic.

Please don’t think I mean males can’t be as equally competent as females. That’s really not it at all. When I found a breast lump a male doctor came (surrounded by female nurses) to do my ultrasound. I felt so mortified but I totally claim that the issue is all mine. I don’t know why I feel this way and it’s NOTHING to do with sex or thinking they are aroused. I just felt embarrassed (while at the same time utterly grateful).

Not smears but I had an internal vaginal scan done by a man a couple of years ago. I was just told this person (trainee) will be doing your scan, I was very uncomfortable but felt put on the spot. I was therefore tense and it was very painful and I was given no privacy or anything afterwards to clean myself up and change. I ended up crying in the toilets afterwards!

I will always refuse in future. You have the right to request intimate examinations by HCPs of the same sex. And to the pp referencing lesbians? What has that got to do with it? Lesbians are still women.

Llanali. I’m sorry for your loss x

I have had both over the years including an internal in hospital by a consultant famous for his lack of bedside manner surrounded at the foot of the bed by a male audience and I don't care to repeat that one.

The male urogynae was a means to an end and no complaints there. It was some birth injuries that needed sorting - he was not easy to talk to but we had time because it was a private appointment and it was a job well done.

I have also had a really helpful, sympathetic, middle aged male locum GP sort out my vag att problem and he really knew his stuff deserves a big gold star .

I much prefer a female HCP for the routine stuff. They are usually fine and more relaxing. It is not the same as negotiating your way through a series of investigations to sort something that you really need doing well so your priorities change. I wouldn't bother going for some of it otherwise as some of it does not seem all that important and the discomfort of the situation outweighs its usefulness otherwise.

I also have a mammo technician who oversquashes and has no communication skills for the job - last time I was sat there whilst she sounded like she was the disabled woman ahead of me through a mangle - the whole caravan thing could hear, including the much gentler technician. I have had extensive follow up and not experienced anything else like it. They really must know - why is there no mechanism to get her retrained without everyone making complaints against her? Their numbers are probably down because of it.

I did ivf. My gynaecologist was male. He operated on me. Did all my ivf treatment, smear, investigations, pick up, embryo transfers and pregnancy scans. Some of the people doing the follicle growth scans at the hospital must have been male. It was so insignificant that I can’t recall.

I have just had a hysterectomy. The surgeon/ gynaecologist is also male. I saw a female one first as she is also an endocrinologist and I wanted my hormones to be checked. She referred me to the surgeon. He was far more sympathetic and thorough than the woman. His words were “I can see why you’re in so much pain. Please consider having the operation. It will make such a difference.” After the op “you are very brave, I have great admiration for you.”

I also had a doctor perve on me when I was 20. Completely different vibe from him.

Strawb - I have had similar in the breast clinic - the male consultant and the female mammographer. I was lying there with my arm up whilst he palpated trying to find something that had appeared on the screening mammo and was no longer there. It took a lot of to-ing and fro-ing to the mammo room and coming back and palpating and ultrasounding. It is a weird place to be. He was thorough though so at least when it was over, it was over.

If you honestly believe a doctor was “trying to stimulate you” during a medical examination then you need to see a police officer.

No, I don't think that. You misunderstood. I didn't like the way he touched my genitals and believe a woman wouldn't have touched me like that as she would have known not to. I am not making any judgement on his motivation, I simply don't know.

But Please don’t give fuel to the fire that men cant be controlled around women because they “are men” - it’s ridiculous and dangerous

I'm not saying that at all. I am certainly not saying the vast majority of doctors are anything other than absolutely honourable and good at their jobs.

But - sexual assault, voyeurism etc are male crimes. 98% of sexual assaults are committed by men.

And doctors are not angels, they are humans. Some of them will be sexually deviant, some will be sexual predators. Hopefully a very small number, but it's easy to avoid them by asking for a woman.

Don't believe me? Google doctors and sexual assault.

Here are several accounts of doctors sexually assaulting women. They're all male - but we know that before even looking, don't we?

In the UK, Between 2014 and 2017 the UK General Medical Council struck off 18 doctors for sexual assault or rape

Sounds like you have some issues

ODFOD.

It sounds like you have some issues recognising the reality of the world we're in. Some men are sexually violent towards woman and they exist in every walk of life.

I'm not being hysterical, I'm not afraid of men. I am simply aware that some of them are a risk to women and taking what I believe to be appropriate steps to protect myself.

If I have an option of a female Dr for an intimate exam, I'll take it. That mitigates that risk. If there's no option, then I'll lump it.

I don't pretend that becoming a doctor stops someone being an ordinary human, underneath.

Yes my first smear ever done by a male GP. To put me at my ease he made a very un pc comment which wouldn't be acceptable today but which made me burst out laughing so I was totally relaxed.

In Spain had follow up mammogram done by a dishy male doctor which I found slightly embarrassing, though I was so worried about the result that didn't last long.

Never. The local breast clinic is staffed entirely by women. You can request a female nurse for a smear.

Yes and many times and each of them have been great professionals . We all, or most of us have some irrational fears. As you said it's ten minutes of your life. Good luck!

I had a male student midwife for delivery. I must admit I felt a bit uncomfortable at first, but by the time it came to actually giving birth I wouldn’t have cared if they had wheeled me to the middle of the street and let anyone have a look if it helped.

OP don't give yourself a hard time ....we all have the odd thing that makes us uncomfortable even if we don't like our reasoning behind it....gice yourself a break and ask for a female doctor if it makes you more comfortable...this stuff is unpleasant enough do what feels right

For me , no it's not a thing and I don't particularly care either way but I am absolutely sure I have other preferences that are a bit unusual or against what I kind of would choose

yes, both.

wasn't an issue for me. and the nurse (same one) had a good manner.

but I do understand that some might not feel comfortable.

I've only ever had women HCP in relation to mammograms, but my very lovely male GP does my smears, OP.

In my case my DF being a GP makes a big difference. I know how male doctors perceive woman patients (if they're any good) so I feel safe as long as I know the doctor.

This thread has reminded me of the only time I felt uncomfortable with a speculum inside me. It was with a woman who wasn't treating me respectfully.

I've had both. He was very good:

Gave me the best advice I've had on what to look for when checking my breasts.

It's the only smear I've had where it didn't hurt. I barely felt it. He was brilliant.

I've had some females who were real cows and cack-handed with the smears.

Hope you get on OK OP.

Not a nurse, but my gynecologist is a man, he does all my exams.

You are completely and utterly NOT Being unreasonabl in the way you feel
P,ease request a female hcp as is your right
I always do and there is no problem, if the practice or clinic is caring enough they will get requests like this all the time and do t question it
It is your body and you give permission to only the people you want to see or touch it, if you are u dear stress it wil,make the experience worse for all concerned p, not least you the most important person I. This procedure
Just phone ahead and arrange it I always do

I had three surgical procedures done at once under local a couple of years ago. I had been told I would need a general but asked to try it under local as I am a single parent and would not have been allowed to look after the children on my own after otherwise. I lay there watching the screen, fascinated, and had it all done with no bother, while the male med student had to leave the room feeling queasy!

since having a mastectomy I’m much more self conscious about how I look, I’m quite happy with my male surgeon, and actually I think I would be ok with a male doing the mammogram. Some of the female breast clinic staff have been cold/ unfriendly and made me feel uncomfortable.

"I don't see why gender comes into it"

Then you must be singularly lacking in imagination.

I had a male midwife do my initial examination when I went into hospital in labour. Also had another male midwife present at the birth.

You have the right to request a same sex provider if you are more comfortable with that.

It’s not bigoted to do so and it’s an important right to have. Women have many reasons for doing so. Some women don’t mind at all, and that’s their right as well.

FWIW I’ve never had a mammogram but I’ve had a smear done by a Male gynae who was good and refused another from a male practitioner who I felt was inappropriate (if you can have sex you can have a smear is NOT something I expect to hear from a HCP.)

You have a right to a same sex provider if that’s what you want. Consent is important. No HCP should be offended by a request for a same sex provider - it’s an entirely reasonable and proportionate request.

Currently, men are not able to train to be mammographers, so it will be a female HCP who undertakes the actual mammogram. There may be male radiologists and consultant radiographers in the clinic who undertake further examinations, like ultrasound, but will always be chaperoned by female members of staff.

The 4 mammograms I have had for cysts have all been done by females but the ultrasounds have all been done by males with a female chaperone.

No but whilst in labour I was examined by a couple of male doctors, I only objected when one did a very aggressive sweep, i jumped about a foot off the bed and told him to fuck off.