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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Aibu to want to put my man child husband in a nappy?

121 replies

Celp28 · 12/07/2018 18:07

😡 need a little vent and possibly for someone to tell me that I’m massively overreacting and this is perfectly acceptable behaviour from an over grown man child! We have both been at work, admittedly he starts earlier than me at 7am until 2 pm, I work 8.30 until 4.30pm. Dh picked up ds2 (3yo) from grandparents. Ds2 is unwell with a cold - so much snot it’d fill the Grand Canyon! Ds2 falls asleep in the car on way home about 3.30pm, dh carries him in and let’s him sleep. I come home at 4.45pm, ds2 still asleep. I ask dh to wake him up while I go to supermarket for needed supplies. 5.20pm I return, ds still asleep. As I walk in the bag splits, shopping spread all over the drive. At this precise moment ds1 (12yo) comes to the door, the dog has eaten a sock and no joke it’s hanging out of his bum ds1 understandably refuses to remove the offending bum sock. So I’m gathering food items from the drive and trying to prevent the bum sock from entering the house. I shout to dh to come help who says he can’t as ds2 needs his nose wiping in his sleep and he’s busy. Wait a couple of minutes, shout for him to bring a poo bag or something to help me retrieve the bum sock before the dog gets in the house. He still doesn’t come. He then shouts that I’m always stressing and finally gets off his bum to come see the commotion. He then literally gags and runs in the house and leaves me with arms full of food and a dog with a sock hanging out his arse! So needless to say, I put my big girl pants on, pulled out the sock, packed away the shopping, woke up the snot monster myself and am now cooking dinner all while he complains that the dog is gross and it’s put him off his dinner just thinking about the sock! Are all men this big a babies? He seriously thinks his life is stressful 😡

OP posts:
crazychemist · 12/07/2018 19:29

Sorry you're having a bad day OP, but thank you for such a hilarious post! Certainly brightened my evening!
Afraid your DH is unlikely to grow up, but once the kids are older it won't bug you so much I reckon. (Sorry that's a bit defeatist)

GunpowderGelatine · 12/07/2018 19:30

I am howling!!! You're very lucky the sock made it through to the bum and didn't kill the dog in the way. My sister has just spent £1,000 getting socks removed from her Collie's tummy.

But YANBU, your DH is a wuss and sounds like he extended DS nap so he could be lazy and not do any parenting

FriendOfScarecrow · 12/07/2018 19:34

My cat once ate a ball of wall and then pooped it out so it was dangling from her bum

Then my other cat chased her around the entire house.

Had shitty wool marks all over my house and bed

But anyway, I digress, dump your husband. He's a cunt and he doesn't care about you.

FriendOfScarecrow · 12/07/2018 19:35

And make sure he puts over napped ds to bed tonight.

JoanFrenulum · 12/07/2018 19:35

Our dog had a tampon string dangling out her bum for a bit. Eventually she shat out the tampon. Revolting creature.

OP maybe DS2 needs a nappy on his head to catch some of the snot?

Rozzzzzalmost35 · 12/07/2018 19:36

Actually crying with laughter about the bum sock

Rozzzzzalmost35 · 12/07/2018 19:36

I am sooooo sorry that your thread is far too funny to get too much helpful advice!

Longdistance · 12/07/2018 19:37

Please tell me you served dh the bum sock for dinner on a plate...

OurMiracle1106 · 12/07/2018 19:41

longdistance
I’m trying to drink a glass of long overdue wine and that image just made me giggle and choke on it!

Sorry OP but sounds like comedy gold!

Rosiepicnic · 12/07/2018 19:42

Thank you so much for this! Im currently 2 days into finding out my H is a cheat & you have given me my first proper laugh. You lady deserve a glass of wine Grin im so lucky my dog is not a sock muncher. I think a thread is needed of all the random items that have been pulled out of pets bums!

PickUpStep · 12/07/2018 19:42

My childhood dogs were both sock-munchers. You would find them in the garden occasionally . Daftest dog (and it was tough competition) exceeded herself once though. She started to throw up. And then some more, and was obviously Very Poorly. Parents took her to the vets where they had to operate to remove an obstruction (and they didn't have insurance at the time...). The stupid beast had managed to choke down an entire tea towel unobserved. It barely had a chew mark on it. I mean, what the hell possesses them!? To her dying day she would've done the same again given the chance I'm sure of it.

I don't have a dog...

Sorry you've had a tough day op.

tsonlyme · 12/07/2018 19:43

Haha that’s funny 😂

I once saw a dog with a condom hanging out of its bum, I really hope it had eaten it because the alternative... yikes.

ivenoideawhatimdoing · 12/07/2018 19:43

I’m crying at this thread 😂

Not laughed this much sine snapped and fartef

ivenoideawhatimdoing · 12/07/2018 19:43

Farted*

binkyblinky · 12/07/2018 19:49

Oh no advice on the hubby front but this is golden - I hope all has calmed down now and you have sorted out said sock.

Our dog ate one of those yellow sponges you can wash your car with once, it came out the other end the same size but a different colour Grin

harriethoyle · 12/07/2018 19:50

Hahahaha. I have a sock muncher and a fishnet stocking eater here... The latter was pooped out on a walk and I just cried with laughter, whilst fellow dog walkers gave me side eyes and a wide berth..!! X

Nomorechickens · 12/07/2018 19:55

I can't compete in the lingerie eating dog stakes, but ddog started foaming at the mouth, whimpering and generally acting very ill. Doctor Google diagnosed bloat, fatal within a few hours, so we phoned the out of hours vet who said to wait 10 mins then ring back if still bad. 10 mins later ddog vomited a large quantity of bright green foam, then got up and trotted off happily. Conclusion- she had eaten a frog and it didn't agree with her.

Celp28 · 12/07/2018 19:55

😂 a condom? Grim! The alternative 🤮 this entire thread has made me howl! And has got me and dh talking again as I’ve been laughing so much and reading your responses to him. Apart from being mildly disgruntled that I’ve made him the subject of an Internet forum dressed as an oversized baby he’s coming to realise that there are more disgusting things for ddog to pass than his smelly sock. You guys are awesome and really cheered me up 😘

OP posts:
Cismyass · 12/07/2018 19:56

This reply has been deleted

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Yumyumpigs · 12/07/2018 19:57

Tinsearseitus 😂🤣😊😂

mamabear2010 · 12/07/2018 20:00

My dog used to poop out socks like me whippy lol

Barbie222 · 12/07/2018 20:00

Woooah! Is that really a thing with dogs and socks. I couldn't face that. I'd have helped you with anything else but not that.

SaltyPeanut · 12/07/2018 20:01

You paint a very vivid picture.

Very annoying for you but oh so funny.

So was basically, "Can't help you dearest, toddler needs nose dabbing with a tissue".... Oooh, lazy bugger and a tad wimpy over the bum sock.

I'd be a little bit tempted to wait until darkness falls and then start digging the hole.

FarFlungFairy · 12/07/2018 20:04

🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣 cut up the bum sock and add it to DH’s dinner.

Magpiemagpie · 12/07/2018 20:08

My dog ate a sock
It came out the other end like a sausage with a Nike Tick on it 😂