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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

To Feel Outraged.

276 replies

IgamOgamJones · 07/07/2018 15:17

I received a letter from my doctor's surgery about cervical smears. I don't want one. I'm 50 and don't want any more, I've done what they said for my entire adult life re getting a cervical smear and I've had enough thank you NHS, no need to spend precious funds on that ok? NO, not ok. The letter says that if I do not wish to have these tests I am required to ring my doctor and then after that if I STILL don't want the bloody thing shoved up me and my cervix scraped then I am required to ring another bloody number! FFS! I don't want my cervix scraped any more and I don't want to listen to a well meaning doctor explain to me that I have no idea about my health so isn't it better to be safe rather than sorry...now, knickers off and open your legs so I can shove this thing up you AGAIN. Am I overreacting, I don't bloody think so!

OP posts:
Pebblespony · 07/07/2018 20:40

You must spend mist of your time being outraged if this is enough to cause it Hmm.

Writersblock2 · 07/07/2018 20:40

@jobjobjob it matters squat to me if you believe me. Why would that matter to me?

Pebblespony · 07/07/2018 20:41

*most

MarthaArthur · 07/07/2018 20:41

Op Yabu for being so outraged over a standardised letter. Its not an issue. They told you how to opt out.

But I feel women should not be bullied into having tests they dont want and told they shouldnt have treatment if they get cancer from not having screenings to detect it before it becomes serious.
Thats dangerous terratory. What next? Obese people. Alcoholics. Drug addicts all banned from NHS care?
You fall off a ladder or have a carcrash and are refused treatment as it was your decision to climb the ladder/get in the car?

Women are free to say no. And they are free to receive treatment should they need it no matter what the circumstance is.

jobjobjob · 07/07/2018 20:41

@Writersblock2 just pointing out to others the bollocks you're talking, hoping it will make them have a smear and save a life really.

SchadenfreudePersonified · 07/07/2018 20:42

You don't enjoy having a cervical smear?

Who the hell does?

However, it is infinitely preferable to being diagnosed with late stage , inoperable, cervical cancer.

You prefer not to have the smears - fine - just don't make an appointment for yourself - but for heaven's sake, don't rant about it like someone not right.

These tests have saved many lives. We are lucky to have a (FREE) service which offers them.

jobjobjob · 07/07/2018 20:43

@MarthaArthur I think this post was a specifically about cervical screening?

Bearbeheind · 07/07/2018 20:43

So you are offered something, that might save your life, free of charge, and you decide to be outraged by it.

It's not pleasant but it doesn't actually hurt.

Just fucking go and save the NHS some money if the worst happens, as they can treat it early, or shut up about it and move on.

MarthaArthur · 07/07/2018 20:44

I had my first smear last week and it caused me a lot of anxiety but i had a great nurse. Mine didnt hurt but had the potential to hurt. The nurse said they were looking for HPV and that most people have it and it can go away on its own. They just keep a check on it. She also said even severe cases of dyskariosis dont worry drs as they keep an eye on changes. (My dsis had severe dyskariosis and had a procedure done. Letz i think?)

jobjobjob · 07/07/2018 20:45

@BlancheM body autonomy, what do you actually mean by that? It's like you're dating it's an abusive procedure? Do you actually mean that?

Writersblock2 · 07/07/2018 20:45

@jobjobjob - a smear doesn’t save a life, it identifies cell changes.

MarthaArthur · 07/07/2018 20:46

I know its about cervical screening but my point is its dangerous terratory saying women who refuse smears should be banned from receiving NHS treatment.

jobjobjob · 07/07/2018 20:47

@Writersblock2 which then leads to saving a life.......

Jade Goody didn't have a smear, look at the outcry after that! It changed things for the better, thank goodness.

SpitefulMidLifeAnimal · 07/07/2018 20:48

I'd rather have a cold speculum than a cold grave. YABU.

BlancheM · 07/07/2018 20:48

Jobjob no, that's not what it means. But since you ask: many, many women can't face it due to it being triggering. Surely you can't be that naive as to not consider what it would be like to some rape/abuse survivors?
Women should always have the right to decline. I can see an argument for it being state sanctioned assault if indeed you and others have your own way and force women to have screenings against their wishes.

Clubcuts · 07/07/2018 20:49

@LighthouseSouth we're talking about smear tests, not running, smoking, dangerous sports!

ferrier · 07/07/2018 20:50

If the NHS want to speak to the op direct then it's up to them to do the phoning or whatever. Trying to get hold of any part of the NHS by phone is a nightmare.

BlancheM · 07/07/2018 20:50

Clubcuts, you and jobjob sound like the same person!

StrangeLookingParasite · 07/07/2018 20:52

No, treatment for an illness is not contingent on consent to invasive testing, people. Get a grip.

No you get a grip. It's five or ten minutes of unpleasantness for a very effective screening process.
I really, really don't like them, since a terrible internal exam while miscarrying was so rough I went into cervical shock.
I do it anyway. Don't be such a bloody sook.

jobjobjob · 07/07/2018 20:54

@BlancheM that's a different discussion and it's not what one single person including the OP has said! It's all I can't be arsed, I don't "like" it, it's not necessary blah blah.

For women that find it triggering I 100 percent agree, but they should have a meeting with doctor each year (without smear) but having a detailed discussion about any period changes, how to be mindful of changes etc.

But that's not what OP (who has disappeared) is portraying.

I. Personally feel that an abused woman should not be sidelined because they can't have a smear. They equally deserve an appointment and a detailed discussion.

Writersblock2 · 07/07/2018 20:55

@jobjobjob - Jade had a form of cervical cancer often not picked up by smears.

Look, I’m not saying women shouldn’t go. I’m saying women should research the facts and decide what’s best for them. And god damn stop shaming women who make different medical choices.

FireF · 07/07/2018 20:56

What?! really confused

You are so privileged that this is offered.

This x 1000

jobjobjob · 07/07/2018 20:58

@Writersblock2
*
@jobjobjob - Jade had a form of cervical cancer often not picked up by smears. *

But sometimes it is? End of argument I'm sure jade and children and family would've loved that opportunity to try.

She's dead now.*
*

zeeboo · 07/07/2018 20:58

You are completely potty. Utterly deranged.

LyndseyKola · 07/07/2018 20:59

It's not pleasant but it doesn't actually hurt.

This isn’t universal.

Mine are extremely painful. Like someone pinching my cervix hard, although it’s even worse as I’m not sure exactly when it’s gonna happen and as it’s internal it sets my teeth on edge knowing I can’t grab or hold it afterwards or make it any better, if that makes sense. And I bleed.

I still have it done regularly, the pain isn’t a good enough reason not to have it done imo. But I would never tell someone it doesn’t hurt, as they might be in for a nasty surprise.