Active discussions

Meet the Other Phone. Only the apps you allow.

Meet the Other Phone.
Only the apps you allow.

Buy now

Please or to access all these features

Talk
AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

Family photos on desk at work - yay or nay?

111 replies

ParkerPen · 30/06/2018 16:17

Context - My dh works for an investment management firm in London. I popped into his office yesterday (we were meeting to go out for dinner) and I noticed that he didn't have any photos of our family on his desk, whereas the desks on either side had several photos of children.

I have loads of photos of our girls and family on my desk at work (I work for the NHS, not in London, and not private sector like dh), so thought this was a bit strange. I like having photos of lovely holidays to look at during the day.

Dh said that when you put photos of your kids on your desk, it's basically saying, "Don't sack me, I have a family to support." He thinks it's a bit pathetic.

Who is right?

OP posts:
megletthesecond · 01/07/2018 10:15

yy, the "do it for her" episode goes through my head at work often.

User46942 · 01/07/2018 10:19

I don’t understand why anyone would need a family photo when they are seeing family either ends of the day.
What do you do within the nhs? I think if you are seeing patients I’d say best not to have photos. Could be a talking point but equally you may be seeing people who have recently been bereaved. They may have lost a child or husband and it would kind of feel inappropriate to have your smiling family there imo. If you have no patient contact less of an issue.

megletthesecond · 01/07/2018 11:03

user because the job is so miserable and isolating it helps to remind myself why I'm there. I'm not doing it for "career progression" or because it's stimulating, quite the opposite. I'm doing it so my dc's have a roof over their head and food to eat and the odd day out. When I'm at rock bottom and struggling a photo pulls me through.

megletthesecond · 01/07/2018 11:03

user because the job is so miserable and isolating it helps to remind myself why I'm there. I'm not doing it for "career progression" or because it's stimulating, quite the opposite. I'm doing it so my dc's have a roof over their head and food to eat and the odd day out. When I'm at rock bottom and struggling a photo pulls me through.

Grasslands · 01/07/2018 11:13

It goes against lean and 5S principles for those companies and professionals that subscribe to that way of thinking.

HappenstanceMarmite · 01/07/2018 12:06

My husband has two large pieces of framed ‘artwork’ by the children and a large portrait of the children and dog on his main office wall. He likes to present as a family man, he likes there to be no doubt he’s married, he likes to be surrounded by family.

I worked with a man who decorated his desk this way. “What a lovely family man” people would say. All the while he was shagging the woman in Marketing two desks away...who also had a family-bedecked workspace 🙄

CherryPavlova · 01/07/2018 13:09

Luckily HappenstanceMarmite, he doesn’t have anyone else in his office (apart from the dog occasionally).

holasoydora · 01/07/2018 14:10

When I had DD I worked in a company where there were suspiciously few part-time working parents and was politely told that I might perhaps wish to clear my desktop of any distractions. I had one photo of my toddler on it.

The two colleagues in my office were childless full-timers who had photos of their partners, 'ironic ' quotes, and posters. Their 'distractions' were not commented on... Hmm

BarbarianMum · 01/07/2018 14:40

Dh has a picture of our kids on his desk at my insistence. The message behind it is "You have 2 kids you love, remember to leave work in time to see them tonight."

He's a reformed workaholic and is out of the house 12 hours a day as it is.

auditqueen · 01/07/2018 15:15

In my experience, those who have photos of family on the desk, talk non stop about their children. But have no interest in their colleagues at all. However, I accept my experience is not the rule

No, it's mine as well. And all those artistic staged photos of cute smiling babies was actually really upsetting a few years ago when I was still coming to terms with being infertile. My manager's wife had a late miscarriage after a long battle with infertility and they are now coming to terms with the fact that they will never have children, so now it's him that's struggling with seeing the photos day after day amd listening to the constant conversations about potty training and school plays. You'd think they had a bit of sensitivity as he told everyone and we could all see how devastating this has been for him, but no. Totally oblivious.

BlueJava · 01/07/2018 15:35

No. I'm not sure why people put them out - although inclined to agree with your DH.

New posts on this thread. Refresh page