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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

Was your daughter on a school trip at Alton towers today?

675 replies

Zzz1234 · 29/06/2018 18:42

Was she late for her bus? did the teacher lose his rag at her in the middle of the entrance area? If so is she ok?

Can’t believe what I saw today, two girls were 20 mins late back, yes they should be in trouble but they did not deserve some teacher screaming at them, I was 75 metres away and could hear everything I felt so sorry for the girls. I was in a queue and I wasn’t talking about it to the other people in the queue, I was about to go over, but another teacher did.

Would love the name of the school to make a complaint to. Heat is not an excuse, I have lived in hot countries and never saw a teacher lose it like he did.

I know it’s not Aibu but posted here for traffic....

OP posts:
Iamtryingtobenicehere · 29/06/2018 21:33

I don’t feel bad for a child getting a severe telling off after making an entire bus wait for 20 minutes. 5 minutes, forgivable, 20 minutes, selfish, thoughtless and hopefully won’t repeat that now.

siwel123 · 29/06/2018 21:34

20 minutes is a hell of a long time to be late.
It isn't just running a few minutes late is it?
Imagine the panic the teachers must have been in wondering what to do etc?

Also think of all the other kids sat on a hot bus wanting to go home.

And think of the parents and carers that may be on a tight schedule and need the bus to be on time to fit into the routine.

And think of the teachers and bus driver who may want to get to their own families who they haven't seen all day and who now will be late back by at least 20 mins if not more if they hit traffic they hadn't planned to hit.

crispysausagerolls · 29/06/2018 21:35

Zzz1234

What would you have done though? Gone over and said “stop shouting at those girls!” ?

Alibaba87 · 29/06/2018 21:35

What was he saying to them?

Thecrabbypatty · 29/06/2018 21:35

If that the PP whose daughter was there and said the girl decided not to come is right, then she did so safe in the smug security that the coach couldn't leave without her. Selfish, entitled and leveraging the situation for her own gain. If all the other kids did this the coach would be there until closing time so yes, she had to publicly be made an example of. Given the limited options for disciplining students in a theme ground car park I would say a thorough, public and embarrassing dressing down was justified.

NotTakenUsername · 29/06/2018 21:35

But sometimes we don’t always act when we should

Oh the irony!

BoneyBackJefferson · 29/06/2018 21:36

mathanxiety

Most of what has been made up about the girls has put them entirely in the position of victim.

We don't know anything about the girls, teacher or situation in general other than what the OP has said and then drip fed in to the thread.

And we certainly don't know what the second teacher said to the first.

There are a whole load of scenarios that could be put in place with this.

But as a teacher I can tell you this what the OP saw was just a snap shot.

As someone that went on these trips as a child/teenager I can tell you that teenagers pull this sort of stuff all the time, they always have done and always will. I have no doubt that what has happened will give these two bragging rights through out what is left of their schooling.

Beehiveyourself · 29/06/2018 21:36

Iamtryingtobenicehere At our school that would be dealt with in s completely different, thoroughly professional, manner. Not by being screamed at in public so loudly that it’s put on the internet.

Should have recorded it OP! (I bet someone did...)

Original poster
Zzz1234 · 29/06/2018 21:36

nokidshere stuff about what rides they had been on, time etc, not abusive, but enough to humiliate something how it was said, espically when heard by so many people. The physical area wasn’t crowded, there is a piece of grass in the middle, shops either side, when someone is shouting next to the grass it could be heard by all around, there was another group of older teenagers/staff nearby saying ‘this is better than Jeremy kyle’

OP posts:
Cheekyandfreaky · 29/06/2018 21:36

If you as a parent were waiting at the school to collect your child and the coach arrived an hour or so later than expected because you find out your child had come back 20 minutes late would you really mind that they were shouted at? You wouldn’t be the only one waiting- there would be other parents, some of whom might have other children or shift work or care for a parent or whatever else goes on in the world. Shouting teachers has always and will always be a thing- you cannot compare it to parenting. Parents generally don’t have 30 kids with them whilst one is pratting around. Parents wouldn’t have to fill out risk assessments and get consent slips, money, coach info blah blah. Parents wouldn’t have to worry about their own family at home waiting for them. Teachers are loco parentis not literally the child’s parent. Hands up if your teacher shouted at you at school- mine did, probably because I was being a tit. Chill out OP.

mathanxiety · 29/06/2018 21:36

ScrommidgeClaryAndSpunt Fri 29-Jun-18 21:19:09
Mathanxiety Yet only one of the two teachers thought this.

Scrommidge - So what? Do they have to reach a consensus before either can act?
That wasn't my point. My point was that almost every poster here was applauding the loud public bollocking, with accompanying despairing noises about how hard teachers' jobs are, and how unacceptable the students' behaviour was, yet one teacher clearly stepped in and moved the situation along while immediately reducing the decibel level.

Doesn't alter the point I was making. Those 20 minutes must have absolute, potentially career-ending hell.
If a school doesn't have a protocol for dealing calmly with situations like this, it has no business taking students on a trip. There are ways of making sure groups stay together and in touch with teachers/chaperones.
If a teacher is so gripped by terror in this situation that he explodes as described at students, then maybe he should sit out the next school trip with the students who elect not to go? Finding yourself short a few students is the classic end of trip scenario. The vast majority of teachers take it in their stride and nobody loses an eye.

Cheekyandfreaky · 29/06/2018 21:37

Apologies for the lack of paragraphs!

qwertyuiopy · 29/06/2018 21:37

NotTakenUsername OP said “when”, not “as”. No irony.

Original poster
Zzz1234 · 29/06/2018 21:37

That’s nearby to me not the girls/ teacher

OP posts:
BoneyBackJefferson · 29/06/2018 21:38

qwertyuiopy

I haven't said that the OP can't post.

They were unprofessional and not fit to look after children.

Good job that we don't hold parents up to such high standards then.

qwertyuiopy · 29/06/2018 21:39

BoneyBackJefferson If doesn’t matter that it was “just a snapshot”. It was enough for members of the public to notice. The teacher is an ambassador of the school and they made the school look shit.

mathanxiety · 29/06/2018 21:39

BoneyBack I can tell you that teenagers pull this sort of stuff all the time, they always have done and always will. I have no doubt that what has happened will give these two bragging rights through out what is left of their schooling.

Then somebody needs to sit the first teacher down and tell him that this was something he need not have got his knickers in such a twist about.

Maybe he has little or no experience of school himself, or teaching teens, or taking groups on trips?

RolyRocks · 29/06/2018 21:40

but I think have said the second adult (I assumed it was a teacher) went over and shouting stopped

Yes and?! So you automatically think the second teacher did so because something was wrong? As I have already said (and another poster) that it is also likely that the other teacher came over to remind of the time.

The fact that the teacher stopped shouting when the other teacher came over highlights the fact they they had not lost control. If they had, they would have continued.

NotTakenUsername · 29/06/2018 21:40

qwertyuiopy I’m happy there is irony in the fact op is looking back at the afternoon and giving herself grace for not intervening... but no grace for the teacher who temporarily lost his cool.

mathanxiety · 29/06/2018 21:41

We don't hold parents up to such high standards because they are not professionals being paid to do a professional job.

qwertyuiopy · 29/06/2018 21:41

BoneyBackJefferson Ah, here we go. The crap teachers’ last stand... insult the parents.

BoneyBackJefferson · 29/06/2018 21:43

qwertyuiopy
The teacher is an ambassador of the school and they made the school look shit.

And so are the two girls.

mathanxiety

Then somebody needs to sit the first teacher down and tell him that this was something he need not have got his knickers in such a twist about.

Maybe he has little or no experience of school himself, or teaching teens, or taking groups on trips?

What is sad is that the teachers involved will have volunteered for this and due to the behaviour of the two girls will most likely not do another trip again.

qwertyuiopy · 29/06/2018 21:43

NotTakenUsername It’s the teachers fucking job you numpty lol!

Thecrabbypatty · 29/06/2018 21:44

Well qwertyuiopy I'm not sure if you have heard or not but there is a teaching crisis at the moment, perhaps you could retrain and show all those crap teachers just how it's done?

Teateaandmoretea · 29/06/2018 21:44

Yabu if my dd rocked up 20 minutes late then tell her off. Jeez the snowflake responses on this thread explain why kids play up in school