To think the lift is for anyone who needs it

[EeyoresEars]

Queuing up to use the lift at a busy station this week. There were about 6-8 people in front of me and I’m not sure how many behind. I waited for lift as I’m pregnant and couldn’t have carried my buggy down the long flight of stairs.

A woman who was using a wheelchair was a couple of people behind me in the queue and I heard her starting to complain, not directed at anyone, just talking loudly so everyone could hear. She kept saying she was going to miss her train because of all the lazy people who should carry their cases down the stairs instead of using the lift.

Then she started complaining about people not carrying buggies down the stairs. I kept ignoring her, as did everyone else, which I think made her more angry. She shouted to a staff member and asked what she was going to do about the lazy people in the queue. The staff member said there isn’t priority access for the lift and it’s safest for people not to carry heavy luggage on stairs if they don’t feel able to. The woman using the wheelchair kept on complaining and saying she was taking it further.

Aibu to think anyone who needs the lift can use it and if you have to queue then that’s just life?

There are signs up at our station that say don't use the stairs with buggies and heavy luggage. The woman had no idea if the person could physically pull up a pram up and down the stairs and even if they could it's dangerous.

Myself and my daughter have invisible disabilities and are regularly tutted at by people in wheelchairs coming out of disabled loos or facilities and my daughter had someone have a right go at her on the bus for twenty minutes of a journey in the style of the woman in the Op. My dd is actually registered disabled.

Just because she was disabled doesn't mean she wasn't being a cow!

but bishop she's allowed to be upset and she's allowed to post about it online if that's what she wants, not up to her what anyone else posts.

you could say oh don't post that thread you know how it will end up, about so many topics. if everyone took that advice mumsnet would be shit.

You might not win that argument parking, feisty

Disabled people should seriously read this shit all the time? Lovely.

Disabled people should seriously read this shit all the time? Lovely

if that was aimed at me, try reading my post again.

I've read it.
So because posters think threads slating disabled people are entertaining it's ok for these kinds of goady thread to exist?

erm, quite clearly no. Stop looking for an argument.

Its nothing to do with it being entertaining. Op was upset by a disabled person and wanted to share that experience and get others opinions. Why should she not be allowed to do that just because the person in question was disabled?

It's not goady. The woman was horrible to OP. is that ok because she is disabled? should OP put up and shut up?

Scribblegirl

If I’m going on a train journey and a disabled person is going on a train journey then it’s pretty obvious that it’s more likely that the person with disabilities will find it more tricky than I would so if I was in a position to make their journey a little bit better then I would. I thought that was normal polite behaviour. If they didn’t want to go to the front of the queue or whatever then that’s ok too! I wouldn’t force them.😕.

Its a shame your Dad would might feel patronised by such a gesture. I would only ever offer in subtle quiet way in the same way I’d offer people with pushchairs to go first. 🤷🏻‍♀️

Op isn't slating disabled people. She's having a moan about a rude woman who yelled and said she should lug a buggy down stairs, and that woman was a wheelchair user.

Individual people are responsible for not posting disabilist posts and MN are responsible for enforcing that.

If you are getting on a train on a wheelchair, it takes longer to get on a train. You have to get staff to get the wheelchair ramp and help you on. So yes she probably did miss her train.

Yanbu op. The lifts are for everyone.

I'm 38 weeks pregnant and really suffering in the hot water - I am constantly weak and feel faint and I have to walk very slowly while pushing my 1 year old's buggy.

However, I would give priority to a wheelchair user as this situation is only temporary for me but people with disabilities have to manage everyday, forever in a world that isn't really set up for them.

Ideally the woman should not have been angry and rude - but sometimes when you see someone acting like this its because the particular event is the straw that broke the camel's back.

Gryffen I often allow an extra half hour. Generally if you've pre booked assistance they require that anyway. Not that the assistance ever turns up 🙄

I did say earlier it's taken up to an hour to use the lift before due to people pushing in, lifts being full etc.

So I really wouldn't appreciate your lecture.

You might not win that argument parking, feisty

I know . I'm too disabled to drive any more, even an adapted vehicle; in a way I'm glad I don't have to go through that again.

@PureColdWind thanks for understanding. I don't think I've ever said it's ok to be rude but I don't see this woman being rude. I live my life in a similar way to her and have the same frustration.

I'm wondering why disabled people aren't allowed to vent frustration at all? Is it because it makes able bodied people feel bad?

Still think it's very mean minded of the OP to then come and start a mean disability slating thread on Mumsnet

She did no such thing. Just because someone is in a wheelchair doesnt make them.a saint. A rude demanding self important person is the same whether they are in a wheelchair or not. Just cos you are in a wc doesnt give you the right to be obnoxious and rude to other people.

That's a shame, feisty. It's my only way of getting out now as assistance on trains is dire and the buggy crew on buses makes life impossible.

I think you don't need to automatically prioritise someone with wheelchair at busy station.
People who patiently waits for it all need it for some reason. People who look able bodied may not be. People with heavy suit case can be dangerous if they use stairs. No way you should use stairs when you are pregnant with a buggy.

Yes it's nicer to let them go first if you are in no rush, but you can't wait forever.

I don't see this woman being rude

you really think this She shouted to a staff member and asked what she was going to do about the lazy people in the queue is not rude?

calling people you know absolutely shite all about lazy? a heavily pregnant woman with a buggy included?

I would say that was very clearly, rude.

I'm wondering why disabled people aren't allowed to vent frustration at all? Is it because it makes able bodied people feel bad?

anyone is allowed to vent their frustration. calling strangers lazy and shouting is not venting your frustration its being rude and thoughtless.

its nothing to do with making able bodied people feel bad. that's goady in itself.

gryffen. That’s disturbing that it makes you smile to tell wheelchair users that they should leave extra time for travelling.

Hmm, My guess is that they already know that their journey will take longer than it would for someone that doesn’t use a wheelchair. 🙄

Ywnbu, in a hospital yes I would let anybody in a wheelchair in front of me or at least make sure they're in first. If the lift was sign posted priority for disabled then yes, Anywhere else.....if your queing for it then you obviously need it, and are entitled to use it end of. Would she of expected to jump the que at Sainsburys for the same reason?

@PureColdWind

The world isn't set up for pregnant women either. Now that I have more time to look around at my world I'm astonished at how little support there is for women and children. The two-income family is the norm now? How can that be possible? Better not get started on that argument, Feisty.

I would of l let anyone in a wheelchair go first.

Whether it's a rule or not it's just good manners.