to be absolutely fucking terrified?

[PereyButton]

I've posted twice already over the past few and will continue to do so until we get our results. Apologies if the serial posting is annoying however I'm in turmoil and find that mn support helps me through.

I'm due an amnio tomorrow. I'm absolutely terrified. Partly because of the miscarriage risk, partly because of the risk of illness in our baby. Partly because I don't know how I'm going to function with a three week wait for the results.

DSD is here at the weekend and she's baby obsessed. She normally sits with her hand on my belly, talks to her brother/sister, asks lots of questions. I just don't want to hear it, and can't stand the idea of potentially having to tell her we aren't having a baby any more (worst case scenario).

AIBU to not know what to do? I'm completely lost. I'm still working and can't focus. I'm catastrophising everything. How can I cope? I've had miscarriages in the past and have convinced myself that I am just not meant to have children. How do I get through the next few weeks?

@Littlechocola to be honest, my midwife is too busy to deal with it properly. She said she would call me twice and both times I never heard from her. When I did finally speak to her she was really awkward and didn't really know what to say. Lovely lovely lady but she's not been the most supportive. She knows about my anxiety but didn't offer any sort of solution or help. I feel a bit lost. I'm going to ask more what support there is tomorrow at the clinic. They're all brilliant there.

The results may come back quicker than you expect. I had cvs (similar to amnio but earlier) and expected the results to take 2-3 weeks but they came back after 5 days.
I hope all goes well

@FutureFairyCrayon thank you. They didn't see anything at the 16 week scan, but at 20 and 21 weeks they saw a severely echogenic and dilated bowel. Both of these together give us a 17% chance of CF. We've both had tests to see if we are carriers but there's a back log at the lab so likely to take a long time.

ARC were great, such a big help. Thanks to everyone who suggested I call them as I had never heard of them before.

Thank you. Fingers and toes crossed.

Good luck, Perey. Thinking of you

I found this forum and the tone seems positive and reassuring;
www.whattoexpect.com/forums/complications/topic/echogenic-bowel-605.html

Try not to stress out too much.

Cf life expectancy is now 60/70 years where once it was 40 which Is A massive difference as that means worst cast scenario that your baby does have cf then he/ she will be dying AFTER you. Sorry to be so blunt but you need to be informed of the facts. Medical advances are happening all the time and I know of one little girl who is on new meds and hasn't had a hospitalisation for several years.

Bless you, that wait is horrendous. We opted for amnio at (I think) 16 or was it 18? weeks) due to a 1 in 5 chance of Down's - like a PP has said, we hadn't decided to terminate in case of a positive diagnosis but needed to know in order to make plans etc. My intial scan gave a 1 in several hundred chance, a blood test took it down to 1 in 80 and a further test to 1 in 5, that's when we opted for amnio. I have never been so fucking terrified in all my life. The 3 week wait for the results was awful but the outcome was that our DD had no abnormalities at all. No advice at all really but just wanted to say I know how you feel, I've been where you are and I'm thinking of you xx

PereyButton That’s sad. Keep pushing it. Do you have any other help for your anxiety not related to your pregnancy? Might be worth looking in to.
I know it won’t help the outcome but could make life so much nicer for you.
I had awful anxiety when pregnant. Midwives aren’t always given enough training around mental health or wellbeing of the mother. I really hope everything works out for you.

@Nofunkingworriesmate I understand the risks of CF. There are lots of different grades. My friend's son died of CF last year and he was only 19. My friends sister is 7 and gets out of breath when she runs and can't take part on sports days etc. Don't think I haven't already thought about all of this because I really have. Only half of people with CF live past 47 and many, many die much younger. It's something we have thought long and hard about.

Thank you @Doremisofarsogood x

@Littlechocola I've tried so many times to get help but usually just have meds thrown at me. I tried counselling but found it very tick boxy.

Bless you, it’s such a worrying time.
If it offers any reassurance, I had a twin amnio at 30 weeks last year as twin 2 had echogenic bowel and also fetal ascites (fluid in abdo)
Had a million scans and we were told to prepare to lose one or both babies. Had CF screen and we were not carriers. Like you, we wanted all the info to make any onward decisions.
The chromosomal Analysis was back within 3 working days and the rest a week later. Thankfully all was fine and (much to fetal med professor’s surprise) the echogenic bowl and ascites resolved by 32 weeks.
I have two healthy 9 month old boys.
I must say it was one of the most stressful periods of my life and my heart goes out to you.
There’s such a range of things this could be and there’s also a chance this might resolve itself, or be an insignificant finding. I really hope so and wish you well with whatever decisions you make X

I had an amnio and the results for the main 3 trisomies (21,13 and 18) were back within less than 48 hours. The others took a bit longer but it was as efficient as it could be. As others have said,1% was the figure quoted but I had a fabulous consultant and felt very safe in her care.

@Offerdecisionneeded thank you so much. Do you mind me asking, did the echogenic bowel show up in more than one scan? I was really hoping it would have resolved itself but it doesn't seem to be...

Thanks @SadMummy85 - I really hope mine come back as quick. We have the weekend to contend with which is a shame but fingers crossed we will at least know something by the beginning of next week.

My house is a mess. I have ironing, cleaning, etc etc to do. I just can't function. MN is getting me through!

I used to work in genetics. Am I right that you are having an amino due to the risk of CF? Why can’t they prioritise your bloods? Samples from ongoing pregnancies should be prioritised/urgent. Have you checked the lab will even analyse an amino for CF without first doing parental bloods? I guess I mean the doctors need to have checked?! The lab can refuse to perform tests.

I think I posted on your other thread as my DC2 had this.

DP and I were screened to see if we were carriers (we weren't) but we weren't offered anything else?

I guess at least the amnio will give you th answers. Are they primarily testing for CF?

So sorry, my intention was to give you some positivity and hope. Your friends son must be very much on your mind. My dd was tested at 2 for cf ( turned out to be another condition I've never heard of)
Apologies again for jumping in with my personal experienced which are " positive"
Wishing you all the best for a healthy outcome

@IkaBaar we were offered amnio because of how late I am in my pregnancy. They have done the CF bloods but we were simply told they might take up to three weeks taking me to 24 weeks. This was far too late for us to be potentially receiving bad news and then having to go through another long wait with amnio. Does this sound incorrect? I presumed they did this regularly but I'm a little concerned now. Surely they wouldn't put someone through an amnio and say no to analysing results, only for me to potentially need another amnio putting me at even higher risk of miscarriage?

@Crunchymum cf, chromosomal abnormalities.. that's all I know. It was booked on the phone so I'm hoping they will explain more tomorrow

Twin 2 had a completely normal 20 week scan and then the echigenic bowel appeared at 22-34 ish weeks. I had almost weekly scans at this point and it increased up to 30 weeks then tailed off.
I always wonder if he had some kind of bowel perforation around 21 weeks which then healed itself leaving ascites and echigenic patches.
I think we pick up too much almost these days by scanning - our ultrasound scanning machines are v advanced and I wonder if we’re picking up ‘pathology’ that is actually insignificant in the long run.
I’m not saying scanning is pointless but it does make you wonder - had I not had an emergency scan at 22 weeks (as thought waters had gone) would we have even known about this? I digress....

I guess I’m trying to say to keep an open mind and try to take each day as it comes because you just never know...

Oh and sod the housework. I wasn’t capable of doing stuff at all during that time, I was a wreck.

Thanks @Offerdecisionneeded - I'm so glad it all worked out ok for you. I'll most definitely update my threads tomorrow, if anyone is interested! I've never had a scared feeling like this in my life. I've had miscarriages which were tough, but nothing like this. I can't describe it. My baby is a little person

You’ll be fine.
The procedure itself is painless and straightforward.
I had mine done after my anomaly scan doubled the risk of DS, was at hospital on my own and just went ahead. Rested for the next couple of days. Got the result the day after.
I was quite anxious but my dd gave me a reassuring first kick the day after I had my amnio and I just took it easy til the Monday (had mine done on a Thursday).
Everything turned out fine- no problems and dd is a smart funny 9 yr old.

I was on your other thread, will be thinking of you tomorrow xxx

Please do come back and let us know. Will be thinking of you.
If you’re in the Midlands, I hope you are at the same place I went to, they’re amazing and looked after us every step of the way.