Mother in law always brings her own hand towel: AIBU?!

[whoknowswhattocallmyself]

So my mother-in-law always brings her own towels (to save on washing...) when she comes to stay.

But AIBU to be irritated that she leaves her hand towel in the bathroom until the second she leaves so she never has to use mine?! My hand towels aren’t perfectly clean (I always put a fresh one out for her as now I feel paranoid) and I don’t have any diseases.

Trying to remain zen about it but feeling rather insulted!

My mum always brings her own hand towel but it's because she uses it for more than her hands, when she washes her face she uses that towel to dry it, and wouldn't want to use a shared towel to do that.

Well if your towels aren’t clean then maybe she just wants to use her own? I wouldn’t be offended.

Did you mean ARE perfectly clean? You've actually said 'My hand towels AREN'T perfectly clean?!

My dm brings her own duvet covers and pillows covers etc. to save on washing, I know it's all done from a place of trying to be helpful, I'd take what your MIL says at face value

If that's her only idiosyncrasy then leave her be! It keeps her happy, it's harming nobody.

No I think OP did mean that because they go on to say I always put a fresh one out for her now indicicating they weren’t before. That’s just how I’m reading it though

my dm may well take her own too, saves on your washing

Does she have eczema or a sensitivity to certain soaps etc? Or maybe she's using it for her face as well?

If not then I agree it's a bit weird!

I expect she uses it when she washes and dries her face?

Does she leave other towels in the bathroom too?
Some people don't like to have damp towels hanging in bedrooms

My dd has to use special detergent for sensitive skin. For something she uses on her face/body she would rather bring her own towel than ask you to change laundry brand.

My MIL brings sheets, pillowcases, duvet covers, towels, etc. She says it is to save me washing.

I think it is a signal of little regard she has for herself as a person because she is a woman. It would only be worth my while to do laundry when FIL stays as he is 'worth' more in her eyes. She constantly keeps busy 'getting on' when she is visiting because women doing nothing is wrong. Scottish Presbyterianism in action.

I bite my tongue.

Personally I can't stand fabric conditioner of any kind. Could it be this?

Yabu to be insulted over a towel. It's just a towel.

My mum does. I think it is to save washing and maybe just how things were - households wouldn’t have spare towels in past and you would take own on holiday if staying in caravans holiday flat etc. I wouldn’t bother about it.

She probably uses your towels for other areas.

In the grand scheme of life this isn't even on the radar for things to get upset over. It's an odd little thing to do, but if it makes her happy why do you even care? I fail to see how this affects you in any way.

My MIL brings her own towel, soap and kitchen cloths when she comes to stay!

(She says she can’t get on with my kitchen sponges - but she always makes a performance of getting out her own cloth and wiping things down. All whilst saying ‘You aren’t offended, are you?’ - that I suspect she’s trying to make a point!)

Still, she’s helping with the washing up/wiping down so I’m not actually complaining.

My MIL does this to save our washing. Makes me laugh at she has these tiny, very old and stiff bath towels and we have nice big fluffy ones.

This would annoy me actually. As I would rather someone say what they would need when they come to stay at my home. Wouldn't like anybody to feel the need to bring their own towels etc. A hand towel doesn't really save on washing, does it!?

Op I think I would ask her what it was she dislikes about the hand towels you have? And would she like you to get a set for her to keep that are just used by her, but washed by you as a hand towel doesn't cause a great deal of extra washing and you are more than happy to wash them

Considering how many MNers say they wash their towels at 30 or 40 degrees, I think this is an excellent idea to store away for when I’m a MIL, in the event that DS’s excellent towel boiling habits don’t prevail

Although I will be tactful and claim a laundry powder allergy

It's because your towels aren't clean and so who can blame her?

My mum always brings her own towels when she stays with us. She never wants to put us out at all.

Considering how many MNers say they wash their towels at 30 or 40 degrees

You don’t think that gets a towel clean enough?

I don't see the issue? I take my own towels everywhere if I'm staying. I have sensitive skin and the last time I used MIL towels nd slept on her bedding I ended up with a rash all over me from her fabric softener. Her house is immaculate its just I can't tolerate her products.

That aside she might just think her towel is used anyway so doesn't want to dirty yours before leaving?