Mother in law always brings her own hand towel: AIBU?!

[whoknowswhattocallmyself]

So my mother-in-law always brings her own towels (to save on washing...) when she comes to stay.

But AIBU to be irritated that she leaves her hand towel in the bathroom until the second she leaves so she never has to use mine?! My hand towels aren’t perfectly clean (I always put a fresh one out for her as now I feel paranoid) and I don’t have any diseases.

Trying to remain zen about it but feeling rather insulted!

Could she have some kind of skin condition?
My mother always bought her own pillowcases, towels etc... with her which she would tiptoe around trying to hide (made no difference to me, I put clean bedding on the bed & a fresh set of towels out for her when she arrived & they all get washed when she leaves regardless)

It turned out she had some kind of infectious skin thing going on & used a greasy cream on it which she didn't want to stain my pillowcases or have other people use a towel she'd wiped her infectious skin on.

I just let her get on with it to be honest, at least she was visiting (she's too sick to now)

In the scheme of things ...

The scheme being there is a nutjob turning Turkey into a dictatorship, Donald Trump is president of the USA, we are Brexiting and sterling is tanking in consequence, Putin is turning the Middle East into even more chaos, Merkel is about to fall to fascists, Austria has already fallen to fascists, I don't even want to tell you about the new president of Ethiopia, there are wars famine and civil disorder everywhere ...

Just let your MIL bring her own towels and don't sweat the small stuff

At least she'll use your toilet. My mil wouldn't!

I always pack towels when I go away, and didn’t realise until nn that I was committing a mistake.

I think things like this are cute quirks - when she is long gone you will look back fondly at her visits with her own towels.

I’d give my left arm for my FIL to turn up for 1 more visit with his own pint glass in hand. (And yes I had plenty of clean pint glasses to offer)

There does seem to be a trend with some posters to find things to be offended about and use this as a way of mocking, belittling other women. I think this is a shame.

My mum brings her own bedding and changes the bed. Tbf she also washes my (clean) spare room bedding and irons it. So that's nice for my next guest since I don't iron...

Yes. It is a direct reflection of how she thinks I keep my home but...meh...

Have stopped changing sheets for her now and appreciate her efforts

If I suggest she naps on my bed I get that bedding cleaned and ironed too. Seeing it as a win

Mil are a breed all of their own! I can say this now i am one 😁!
I bought 3 sets of matching towels identical to the ones we have at home (for me dh and dd) and took them to my ds and ddil's home. We all have different colours so we only use our own anyway. Also i took sheets and bought new pillows and quilts for us to use when we stay over.
When they got their house they needed their money for their things, they didnt need to be worrying about things for us too.
They live 300 miles away so it always means staying at least 3 or 4 nights. Dil always washes things and they are always lovely and fresh for us.
I also take washing up gloves with me as she doesn't use them but i do.
I would just let your mil do as she likes and if this is all you have to moan about think yourself lucky! 🤔😊

My MIL used to do this. Potato peelers, knives, vegetables and god knows what else used to be lugged over on the ferry from mainland Europe when she visited too .No skin conditions, or having to share hand towels with others - she was provided with a freshly cleaned guest room and en suite and pile of freshly laundered towels.

It was a combination of not wanting to impose/put me out, together with an ingrained suspicion that we might not be providing what she needed, despite the fact that she had visited many times. Plus I suspect a dose of still seeing her son as a nineteen year old student who needed to be mothered, despite him actually being a married man with children in his late thirties.

It made me feel like a rubbish hostess, like a demeaning comment on my housekeeping, but I tolerated it knowing it came from a caring motivation until one time she caught me on a bad day and I snapped “We’re not savages you know! We have towels! We have knives! We’re not students living in halls!” and this finally curbed it. Mostly...