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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Aggressive woman in softplay

147 replies

Thewheelshavefallenoffthebus · 20/06/2018 20:27

So, went to softplay today (go all the time with my two very young dcs)

Another lady (i’ll call her Waynetta) was there with her gc.

Her gc was throwing food in the toddler area, crunching it on everything, everywhere and the woman was wearing her dirty shoes in the baby/toddlers play area. A member of staff told her to take her shoes off and remove the food as it is not allowed in the play area and is unhygienic but she hadn’t.

My youngest (1) climbed up to the top of the ladder and ended up on the platform and beside the woman’s gc. He put his hand in the girls bag of puffs (because he is a baby and saw puffs!) and I took it straight back out again and said no, not your puffs. the woman went mental - said my child had no manners and needed to ‘gerrof her (gd) puffs’ and be taught some manners (!)

I told her that my child is a baby and there is nothing wrong re my child’s manners thank you and that her gc shouldn’t have food in there anyway and that I had heard her being told to take it out. I also said I heard that she (grandmother) had been told to remove her own shoes yet still had them on in there where babies crawl around and it was unhygienic.

Waynetta went ballistic. Member of staff had returned and witnessed this and told her to take food out, take shoes off and that they don’t tolerate aggressive/abusive behaviour. Waynetta then said she’d be bringing her daughter to ‘floor me’ and the member of staff too and that we’d both Be knocked out.

My response was wtaf?

I took my dcs and went to find manager.

Manager tells me Waynetta has been caught stealing drinks from them, has been rude etc and could see I was shaken and upset.

Manager returns with me and Waynetta keeps on

Manager doesn’t make her leave!

Waynetta leaves shortly after but again threatens member of staff that her ‘daughter will be coming with her next time and so she will see what happens!’

I get upset and in my view this woman should be banned.

I’ve never experienced such a violent personality in a soft play place.

Should I be taking This further? Waynetta goes there as often as I do but I’ve previously been warned off her as she is odd.

I feel I can’t go there but I don’t have any other one to go to! Why should I have to stop going when I didn’t do anything wrong.

OP posts:
Thewheelshavefallenoffthebus · 20/06/2018 21:11

Waynetta was rude to me about my dc. I replied but wasn’t aggressive. She then went ballistic.

OP posts:
GabsAlot · 20/06/2018 21:13

can you go above the manager is it a chain?

if not go on sm detailing the hygiene situation at least

RebeccaBunchLawyer · 20/06/2018 21:19

Absolute chav lowlife scum. I was at the McDonalds Drivethru thing last night and saw probably the same family park up, eat their food and then throw all their rubbish on to the ground, which although bad in itself, was a few steps away from a bin. I called after them to pick up their rubbish but they zoomed off.

Some people are disgusting, and quite frankly, I fear for the future of humanity and our planet.

GreatDuckCookery6211 · 20/06/2018 21:21

Oh Christ not another soft play thread.

Bearfam · 20/06/2018 21:27

Urgh the woman sounds really common and uncouth. I would be put of going there again. I also think the manager should have done more to protect other customers. Deff should ban her.

Thewheelshavefallenoffthebus · 20/06/2018 21:43

Thank you. So the overwhelming majority agree that she should have been banned.

Thank you.

I’m anxious over going back and feel very sorry for the member of staff who wasn’t backed up by her manager. Not good.

I will speak with the general manager and see what he says. He seems to be a nice and reasonable person and I think he would be mortified that this has happened.

OP posts:
Samewitches · 20/06/2018 21:50

Irrespective of the incident with the GM, I wouldn't return to a soft play with my very young DC's in which there was a child running around with food and an adult with shoes on that the staff knew about and did nothing. In my most local small one the staff would have stood and waited for her to take her shoes off/ kid out with food. If they do nothing when it's empty do they even notice when it's full? I'd leave a review on their SM about that on it's own and leave the GM's behaviour out of it. I would expect a reply via email about the aggression though. And make it clear I wouldn't be returning and would be telling all my friends who go there about it unless they reply satisfactorily.

Thewheelshavefallenoffthebus · 20/06/2018 21:57

Thank you.

I had previously thought it was a clean place and I like to go as it’s quiet. This incident has shaken me if I’m totally honest and I’m still upset about it now as it was totally unnecessary and really unpleasant.

The shoes and food should have been addressed more firmly by staff which could have meant this situation was avoided....but I suspect she was just wanting an argument regardless and I copped for it.

It was the duty manager who dealt with it, by saying she didn’t witness the incident and therefore couldn’t take any action, which will have undermined the member of staff who did witness it and told her. I am speaking with the general manager (her boss) tomorrow.

It’s spoilt the place for me to be honest. I feel let down. My eldest starts nursery in September and then I think i’ll do something else with my youngest.

OP posts:
bobstersmum · 20/06/2018 22:00

Shumpalumpa you are waynetta aren't you!! Come on tell us why you were so nasty to the op? Had too many Stella's?

Thewheelshavefallenoffthebus · 20/06/2018 22:03

Thanks bobster. I suspect you may be right 😉

OP posts:
ThreeIsACharm · 20/06/2018 22:03

I would also write a letter to your local council. This is a safe guarding issue since her behaviour was so inappropriate in a children's environment and was not controlled sufficiently by the staff.
Even if it is a private company they still have to follow certain safe guarding rules.

Aeroflotgirl · 20/06/2018 22:05

My goodness poor you op, of corse it is a non event. The woman sounds nasty and aggressive.

LOliver123 · 20/06/2018 22:08

Not a place I would go to again with my child!

Awwlookatmybabyspider · 20/06/2018 22:09

A non event. ODFOD.
I think to be honest management are too scared of the repercussions if they do ban her to be honest.
Hopefully one day she'll meet her match.

Thewheelshavefallenoffthebus · 20/06/2018 22:10

I think what upset me most was that my eldest dc (very engaging and happy) visibly flinched and cried when another woman addressed him in the soft play after this incident (she only said Hello) - he was clearl unsettled and upset by what Waynetta has done and seemed to be expecting the new lady who had just come in to shout too.

OP posts:
flippinthebird · 20/06/2018 22:14

Shump are you waynetta?

APlaceInTheWinter · 20/06/2018 22:20

The woman sounds horrendous but as a PP said if my DC put their hand in someone else's crisps, I would apologise not give them grief for having the crisps in there in the first place.
If you frequent places where the management are too frightened to act against other customers then you need to consider how important it is to you to be in the right. Being in the right won't protect you if someone decides to 'floor' you and I imagine you being right won't be much comfort to your DCs if they end up witnessing shouting and fighting.
If I were you, I'd find another soft play.

Awwlookatmybabyspider · 20/06/2018 22:24

Sugar perhaps if op had ha very said that
Waynetta would have shit herself. Bullies often do when theyre stood up to

BrendasUmbrella · 20/06/2018 22:30

You sound very superior. And it's sounds like a non-event.

I won't tell you what you sound like...

junedaze · 20/06/2018 22:31

What's with the Waynetta comment then, OP? Are you trying to paint this woman a chav?

What would YOU paint her as?

gryffen · 20/06/2018 22:33

Complain to a head office (if soft play is a ckmpany) or write a letter with a FOI for CCTV and say you and staff were threatened and action will be taken for failure to safeguard vulnerable adults and children from violence.

Had to do same in company up here and it fast shifted her and passed onto police two years ago.

If she actually touched you or child then you also have grounds for assault.

Hope that helps
(Security 10+ years)

Hoopaloop · 20/06/2018 22:33

Really? Waynetta sounds like a complete bullying cacker.

Thewheelshavefallenoffthebus · 20/06/2018 22:40

Thanks x x x

I asked about cctv to be told it doesn’t record as they aren’t allowed to record children.

So, you can do anything and there’s no record?!?

Absolutely ridiculous

OP posts:
cherish123 · 20/06/2018 22:42

Waynetta! That's great. I can just imagine her. I've used that term to describe undesirables.😆On a serious note, this is aggressive and awful behaviour.

tillytrotter1 · 20/06/2018 22:42

You sound very superior. And it's sounds like a non-event.

I would certainly feel superior when confronted with this type of person, you make it sound like a bad thing being superior. It simply means that one has more civilised standards.

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