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Original poster

To expect my kids to play in their bedrooms more?

61 replies

NotAnotherHeffalump · 17/06/2018 09:05

I have DS1 aged 9, DD1 aged 3 and DS2 aged 2.

Any tips to get them away from the screens and up in their rooms playing with toys? Younger 2 DCs aren't really into screens apart from the odd cartoon. We have taken the Xbox and iPad off DS1 except for an hour or two at weekends and we are limiting TV to an hour in the evenings.

I need inspiration in how to get them interested in playing upstairs though. I don't want them all just hanging around my heels all day, DS1 does tend to just lurk around me when he's bored.

OP posts:
MinorRSole · 17/06/2018 09:07

The younger 2 are too young really and the older one would probably prefer being outside with his friends. My dts are 6 and don't play upstairs much but will happily play outside for hours so maybe try the garden instead

UpstartCrow · 17/06/2018 09:09

A 2 year old cannot be left to entertain themselves.
The older one shouldn't be left with the younger 2 wandering in to his room and dismantling his things, olus things that are safe for him to play with such as felt tips and scissors are destructive in the hands of toddlers.

They need toys and activities they are interested in.
Music, audio stories, a radio. Your older DS might like to experiment with tuning it in to different stations.
Books.
Lego.

Sevendown · 17/06/2018 09:09

Ime 9 year olds don’t ‘play’ much anymore.

What kind of toys are you expecting him to play with? Some Lego might keep him occupied for half an hour but not all day!

That is why most kids are on screens a lot!

The weather’s good- take them out and about more?

Ilovecamping · 17/06/2018 09:11

Why play upstairs? I had the toys downstairs and bedrooms for sleeping.

Yogafailure · 17/06/2018 09:12

Just wait until they are older. Then they live in their rooms and you sometimes you can't lure them out even with the promise of food. Then you long for the days when they were under your feet and you know, had the odd conversation with you.

Bananarama12 · 17/06/2018 09:14

Do some messy play, colouring, cooking, making mud pies in the garden?

megletthesecond · 17/06/2018 09:15

Do you have a safe garden? Colour chalking on the path is popular with mine. Hoop games, building a wildlife patch with a margarine tub for mini pond etc.

happymummy12345 · 17/06/2018 09:18

The younger 2 are too young for that. You can't just shove them in their room and leave them. If you didn't want them round your feet all day as you so nicely put it, perhaps you shouldn't of had them?

ProperLavs · 17/06/2018 09:20

some kids play on their on some don't. My experience of my 6 dc is that they preferred to be where you are when they are younger. Mine never played in their rooms unless I was with them. As teens they are never downstairs.

keepingbees · 17/06/2018 09:22

What about some clubs/ hobbies/playdates with friends for the 9 year old?
Younger 2 need you to stimulate and play with them, they shouldn't be up in their rooms on their own at that age.

Sevendown · 17/06/2018 09:24

What are you doing all day in the house that you don’t want them around for?

Ok to send them up for 20 mins while you cook dinner but we are long past children ‘being seen but not heard’.

Can the 9yo read? Do you have lots of books? What about arts materials?

Miladamermalada · 17/06/2018 09:26

If you didn't want them round your feet all day as you so nicely put it, perhaps you shouldn't of had them?
Oh do fuck off.
Having kids is hard. However OP I think you are unrealistic in expecting your younger 2 to be upstairs for a couple of years yet. I would also relax your screen time policy.

I feel the same but mine are much older. They still don't go in their rooms though. I'm getting one of them a games console for their birthday which they will hopefully play upstairs.
I get that being around kids all day is awful at times. You need space, and I think that's the issue rather than the kids being downstairs. Do you ever get a break from them?

Redgreencoverplant · 17/06/2018 09:26

My DS is 2 and with Duplo can manage 15-20 mins of solitary playing but by and large he wants to be with me. We go out and about most of the time but if I want a break at home I use the TV. I don't think toddlers can really be expected to play in their rooms, give it a couple of years and you will probably have more free time 😀

sarahsnail · 17/06/2018 09:38

The younger 2 are too young for that. You can't just shove them in their room and leave them. If you didn't want them round your feet all day as you so nicely put it, perhaps you shouldn't of had them?

Wtf???

What about making a “den” out of a few bed sheets and cushions downstairs, mine used to play for hours with their toys in the “secret hideout”. Close enough to be near you but they feel like they have their own space to let you have 5 mins peace.

BarefootHippieChick · 17/06/2018 09:40

What yoga says. I will happily put up with any amount of youtube and boy band crap on my tv just so I can see my dcs and remember what they actually look like.

Passmethecrisps · 17/06/2018 09:46

What is your eldest into? It might be that he needs some guidance or inspiration. Maybe set him a task for half an hour - draw something or create a Lego model for example. I don’t have a nine year old so I am not sure about the time but I know my 5 year old would cope ok with that for maybe 20 minutes to half an hour as long as she had purpose.

The wee ones are just too wee I think. I would go with the den downstairs idea if you are needing some time to cook or get on with things. I wouldn’t leave the big one responsible for the wee ones

And saying that people shouldn’t have had children because they parent differently to you is offensive bullshit happymummy.

Flisspaps · 17/06/2018 09:48

@happymummy12345 if you're going to be a dick, at least be a grammatically correct dick.**

It's not of, it's have.

BeyondThePage · 17/06/2018 09:50

When mine were little and under my feet and I'd had enough - they got given a pot of water and a paintbrush and went off merrily to "clean" the outside of the shed for me. Or the fence...

but for day to day, we had a sheet on the floor - lego and "people" and "animal" toys on it (so at the end of the day it got gathered up) and some music on the stereo or on the telly - it puts a pic of the album cover on the amazon music playlist - so they feel they are watching telly Wink - whilst playing.

Butterflykissess · 17/06/2018 09:59

yikes! some of these comments. my 4 always play together in their rooms including the baby (13 months.) a lone parent i wouldnt be able to do anything otherwise. maybe i shouldnt have had them eye rolls.

Jasmina456 · 17/06/2018 10:04

Your oldest is too old to 'play with toys in his room' - surely he'd rather play outside in the garden or in the street with friends.

And your youngest two are too young to be able to entertain themselves in their rooms.

WaggyMama · 17/06/2018 10:07

There'll come a day they never leave their rooms!!

BoxsetsAndPopcorn · 17/06/2018 10:10

Why bother having children?

The youngest two need adult supervision at all times and most nine year olds don't play with toys.

Maybe if you did something with them they wouldn't be bored.

yikesanotherbooboo · 17/06/2018 10:40

I never achieved
'Playing in their room' . My two who were close in age did however play together a lot with or without friends. My third DC needed company and either tagged along or was kept company by an adult. It's not that long in the greater scheme of things ... they are soon teenagers.

SeaToSki · 17/06/2018 10:50

To the 9 yr old, if you are bored, I can find you some jobs to do.

For the little ones, lets go and build some lego in your room, then nip off to get a cup of tea and pop back to check on them/inspire them every 20 mins or so.

The 9 yr old will need some time to re find his imagination if you have cut back on screen time suddenly. Maybe you can help him make a list of things he could do when bored, stick it on the fridge and point to it if necessary.

Miladamermalada · 17/06/2018 10:56

Why bother having children?
As usual another flammatory critical comment from Box.
Perhaps because she didn't realise how shit it can be having 2 toddlers stuck round your feet when you are still expected to do the wifework, probably when she still gets broken sleep.
Never have sex do you? Because it's always a risk of pregnancy.
Perhaps you are perfect.
OP there is something in playing with them when they are good. It rewards good behaviour.
Looking after little kids can be shit even for the best mothers.