To expect my kids to play in their bedrooms more?

[NotAnotherHeffalump]

I have DS1 aged 9, DD1 aged 3 and DS2 aged 2.

Any tips to get them away from the screens and up in their rooms playing with toys? Younger 2 DCs aren't really into screens apart from the odd cartoon. We have taken the Xbox and iPad off DS1 except for an hour or two at weekends and we are limiting TV to an hour in the evenings.

I need inspiration in how to get them interested in playing upstairs though. I don't want them all just hanging around my heels all day, DS1 does tend to just lurk around me when he's bored.

I don't get why being downstairs has to be associated with screens. Just ban tablets and switch the tv off, and leave the kids play with toys downstairs. The little ones will be happy because they are near you, or they can help you with the housework.

The 9 year old can help you too, or play downstairs.

Unless you have guests or clients, it's mean to send the kids in their bedrooms for the day. It's their home too, limit toys in the living room to keep the house tidy, but it's nicer to be together

Thanks satchell. We have loads of toys, but they're mostly in a big toy box. I think I'll have to divide them out a bit better so that each activity is by itself and get them out one at a time.

I had thought that a 9 year old amusing himself without a screen wasn't a big stretch either Crusoe. Since telling him about the reduced screen time he has poked through the recycling and tried to make a parachute. Long may it last!

My eldest stopped playing with toys early...about 9. She preferred to make stuff....lip balms, jewellry etc. Maybe crafts might be more attractive? Fimo is good.

I too am baffled by the '9 year olds don't play with toys' comments. I assume that's why Toys r Us went bust because people didn't think their children wouldn't want Lego, K'nex, Racing cars, train sets, meccano, airfix, craft sets, board games, Sylvanian Families, dolls, Star Wars stuff, footballs, skateboards..... etc because they have reached the grand ol' age of 9. Sad.

That's a good idea she's, will definitely look into fimo.

I find toys like Lego, craft supplies, train tracks, car mats and cars, playmobil etc where they can set up their own play have much more success than just a car, just a toy that beeps etc. I have them split into boxes so some days we get 'the playmobil' out and have cities set up across the living room, other days it is Lego and building castles, zoos, cities etc whatever they fancy. My 6yo likes to play at 'being a...' so for example one day they will be a vet. They draw prescription pads, get the doctors kit out and have all the soft toys lined up as patients. They've been architects with the wooden bricks/Lego, drawing building plans then building them. Handymen, doctors, teachers etc. Anything they can think of!

My 10 year olds play lots, often only once I've told them screen time is done for the day. They like lego, small collector toys, drawing, making cartoons and reading. They also like crafts and science which due to the mess I like lessI think dc have to grow through a being bored patch sometimes before they start amusing themselves.

For smaller dc I would suggest physical versions of what they like, when smaller my pair had loads of Thomas trains, an aqua mat with a train, I loved aqua mats. Duplo was good. They liked play dough, I liked it less. Play kitchen and food. Outside sand box, water table and small play cube thing.

@Crusoe - your DS sounds lovely, that's how I'd like mine to be when he's older. Especially as my DS is an only child, it's nice to hear positive stories about boys entertaining themselves without being either in a group or glued to a screen.

I disagree that a 2 year old can’t entertain themselves. They most definitely can engage in solo imaginary play at that age, choose their own activities and “find” things to do.

They do need an eye on them, of course, but the idea that a toddler can’t- or shouldn’t - entertain themselves is, politely, bollocks.

In my living room, I’ve made an entirely child proof environment, we have a toy corner with a selection of different toys, a shared bookcase in the other corner of the room, paper, wax crayons and sticker books always on the coffee table, and big floor cushions along one wall for building towers/ dens/ running around.

And I would say I actively “play” with DS about 30% of the time, when he is playing. I chatter to him about what he’s doing if he seems to want that, and I get involved if he asks- but otherwise I think it’s my job to facilitate play- not to commandeer it.

Pinterest is full of activities to keep toddlers amused, could you get the 9 year old involved, get him to find a task and set it up? It maybe a chore but a rather enjoyable one? Hide and seek is a favourite with my toddler, and that also helps with counting.

Some kids are just more independent players than others.