Meet the Other Phone. Only the apps you allow.

Meet the Other Phone.
Only the apps you allow.

Buy now

Please or to access all these features

AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

See all MNHQ comments on this thread

To think you shouldn't be better off a single parent living with family than being in a working couple? **Title edited by MNHQ**

376 replies

CallingAllLovers · 16/06/2018 17:36

In a nutshell, I'm working 17 hours a week and getting £700 take home salary, plus £82 something Child Benefit. I have one DC.

On top of this, I get about £800 it so in tax credits.

I'm now separated from my husband so living with family.

I'm far better off financially than I was when both myself and H worked and ran a home together.

I have a friend who's really struggling, her DH and her both work full time with one DC. Another friend in a similar situation with two DC.

I was incredibly panicked when leaving H, I often kept staying when things were really tough due to being petrified of how skint I would be.

But it's not the case.

I did wonder why the money I get was so high, then I was told tax credits don't care about your bills/outgoings, just your childcare.

AIBU to think I shouldn't be better off than someone working full time, or a hard working couple working full time?

I realise this thread sounds really goady, but I'm not trying to be.

It just seems like people are penalised for working more/having a partner.

OP posts:
CallingAllLovers · 16/06/2018 17:51

Bump x

OP posts:
GrannyGrissle · 16/06/2018 17:52

You get HOW MUCH? Bloody hell that sounds good to me!

CallingAllLovers · 16/06/2018 17:53

Granny the figures are correct.

I guess it would be extremely difficult, even with all of that, if I was running my own household and doing it all whilst paying out for all the bills that come with living independently

OP posts:
siwel123 · 16/06/2018 17:57

I think it's the other way round. If one person in a couple earns more they can transfer so much to their partners tax threshold which Emma dthey avoid spying as much tax etc.

siwel123 · 16/06/2018 17:57

Means they avoid

Tangled59 · 16/06/2018 17:59

People should be "penalised" for having a partner (i have one). A good relationship makes life 100 times easier practically financially and emotionally.

TragicBoozyFlaccidClown · 16/06/2018 18:03

Ooh a other one of these threads!

‘I’m single and claim tax credits and now I have too much money!!’ wrings hands and beats self with a stick

TragicBoozyFlaccidClown · 16/06/2018 18:04

If it makes you feel better, I know of plenty of people struggling to make ends meet on tax credits. Maybe cos they don’t earn around £40 an hour like you do, who knows

CallingAllLovers · 16/06/2018 18:06

Tragic I earn around £9K a year

OP posts:
RebelRogue · 16/06/2018 18:07

You are annoyed about how much YOU are getting? Give some money to your struggling friends. Stop claiming if you have too much. Burn it in a bonfire praying to the Gods so that others get less.

Do you pay (going rate) rent?

You're not being goady,you are being a dick. Maybe stop and think about other single parents that have high housing,childcare and living costs. Single parents that don't have any family anywhere near them,much less family they can live with and rely on for support. Think of single mums that had to flee with just the clothes on their back and had to start over again all alone,home,job,furniture etc. Think of single parents that need to work a lot more hours (or stupid shifts) to only get paid a few hundred pounds more than you. Think of single parents that have a disability,or their kids have a disability.

NapQueen · 16/06/2018 18:12

Presumably you are better off because you are living with family and dont have living costs.

If you had to pay the average rent and bills would you still be rolling in it?

VioletCharlotte · 16/06/2018 18:13

I'm assuming you're paying child care and a large chunk of the tax credits is to pay for that?

You're very lucky that you're living with family. If you had to rent a 2 bedroom house/ flat you would be paying £800pm in rent, plus bills on top. You wouldn't think you were so well off on benefits then, would you?

ohreallyohreallyoh · 16/06/2018 18:14

Jesus wept. It’s hard enough as it is for single parents and you come out with this shite. Work harder if it bothers you.

I take massive exception to the idea that two,people should be better off than one. Plenty of single people earn very good salaries. You seem to be suggesting that should ‘t be the case.

You also seem to suggest that only couples can be hardworking. That’s really not the case, is it?

thatmustbenigelwiththebrie · 16/06/2018 18:14

You get EIGHT HUNDRED QUID A MONTH? Wtf.

CallingAllLovers · 16/06/2018 18:15

Oh shit, didn't include in my OP about single parents with no living costs

I should have, obviously. Sorry, currently feeding DS.

Basically, I mean single parents with no living costs. Surely we shouldn't get the same amount that someone who has real living costs to pay, does?

I'm very happy with my lot and can afford a lot of nice things for myself and DC now.

I wouldn't if I had to pay living costs!

OP posts:
VioletCharlotte · 16/06/2018 18:19

Well don't claim then if you don't think it's right!!

Child tax credits are based on income, not outgoings.

OpalIridescence · 16/06/2018 18:22

I'm a single parent, two small children, work about same as you, pay going rate rent and I have nothing at all left at the end of the month after bills. My life is a struggle financially.

Your situation is unusual which you should realise. You live with family, this means you are lucky. Why did that motivate you to light the touch paper of this discussion to bash single parents and benefit claimants in one sweep?

Thank you for starting yet another ugly thread encouraging vile attitudes against people like me.

68Anon · 16/06/2018 18:22

So your monthly 'income' is in excess of £6000 and you're living with family? With that income why are you not living independently?

liverbird10 · 16/06/2018 18:23

What on earth?

VioletCharlotte · 16/06/2018 18:24

@68Anon where did you get that from?? She said she earns £700 a month and gets £82 child benefit and. £800 tax credit.

OP, presumably you won't want to live with family forever. I'd be saving this money for a deposit on a rental property, furniture, etc. And have some money out by for when you do have outgoings and are struggling to make ends meet!

DontTouchTheMoustache · 16/06/2018 18:24

Not all single parents have maintenance payments from exes. I currently wprk 16.5 hours p/w with 1080 salary topped up with 720 UC. this only just covers all of my outgoings (including large debt repayments).

CallingAllLovers · 16/06/2018 18:25

Well don't claim then if you don't think it's right

Oh ffs, can no one have a conversation anymore without be shouted down?

It's just a discussion.

As I said just how, I should've said single parents who live with family.

Obviously single parents doing everything on their own and paying all the costs of living will have a much worse time.

I've asked MN to edit the title so it reflects that

OP posts:
Caribbeanyesplease · 16/06/2018 18:26

Op I think exactly the same

Especially as child maintenance isn’t factored in to benefit calculations and I receive a lot in CM

Caribbeanyesplease · 16/06/2018 18:28

How come £800 op? What’s the breakdown?

I get £138 Child Benefit (2 children)
£475 tax credits. I was told that was the max

VioletCharlotte · 16/06/2018 18:29

@CallingAllLovers the problem with starting discussions like this is that it really upsets single parents who are struggling to make ends meet, as it adds fuel to the argument that single Mums are living the life of riley on benefits, which is simply not the case.

Your situation is very unusual. Tax credits are based on income. DWP couldn't possibly also factor in every claimants living costs in their calculations, it wouldn't be manageable.

As I said in my last post, make the most of having the extra cash while you're living with family, and save it up to prepare for when you get your own place.

Swipe left for the next trending thread