Aibu or is this disrespectful

[Alwaysadramaaa]

Long time lurker here...first time poster. Scrolling through my Facebook feed earlier to see a selfie posted by a family at a grave side of a grandparent, headstone in the background. Aibu to think some things should be private, grief bring one of them & this is just attention seeking or is this a nice way to remember a loved one?

Not something I would do but each to there own!

What difference does it make to you?

Did they do #sadface ? A whole family selfie? Wow.

I don't think we should dictate how anyone else grieves.

I also think we're fairly shit as a nation at talking about and dealing with death. It may be attention seeking but that person may not feel able or have the vocabulary/confidence to reach out in a different way.

No difference at all costa I just personally find it disrespectful of the deceased so wanted opinions of others

Victorians used to photo dead relatives propped up with the living relatives or laying on a bed. This is not new and actually i think its a good thing. Its not making death taboo which is great.

Why on earth post something like that on Facebook. Such bad taste

No I don’t. They are dead-they won’t give a fuck.

Op asking this politely but how is it disrespecting the dead person?

Its including them in their daily lives despite the fact they are gone.

not something I would do personally but times are changing and everything has to be documented.

Saying that the Victorians dolled up their recently deceased loved ones and hired a photographer so maybe we're the ones who aren't traditional.

It was just the headstone, right, not the actual body? Was it at the service, it did they just stop by to visit and took a picture? I take cemetery pictures all the time, and post them in an album on FB.

No, it’s fine.

Is thinking about and Rembering a loved one really disrespectful? If may not be how you would do it but that doesn’t mean it’s disrespectful

Not something I would do but each to there own!

Agree with this

Unless the photo is them flipping the vs at the headstone theres no disrespect. Graves arent secret.

Too much.
Is it a recent death?

Yes but I also think that c paying wedding photis is weird.

I just would never dream of posting pictures of my loved ones graves online but like has been said previously each to their own

I wouldn't do it but if it's their relative and it won't offend anybody else then so be it.

Really? When you're dead you don't have to worry about social media. It really doesn't matter to them any more. You're being judgy.

When you say a 'selfie', is it a photo of the relative standing beside the grave, giving a thumbs up or suchlike?

Is there no accompanying text to give the photo context?

I wouldn't do it personally. but my SIL sent her brother (my XH) a photo of their mum's grave in his birthday card one year - which I thought was a bit weird (and so did he), but it wasn't done with any malicious intent she just thought he'd like to see the photo.

So I guess if the person doing it has good intentions it's not disrespectful.
Sometimes people put things like that up and get messages saying things like 'your Mum was a lovely person' etc. And maybe that gives them comfort.

I have a photo of a relative's gravestone. I am glad to have it as the person died abroad and I probably would never visit the country. I would never put it on any internet site.

It’s a family pic butchy with gravestone in the background. Mum, dad & children smiling for the camera