is it unreasonable to leave someone for their political views?

[MrsCD67]

DD's boyfriend is far-right and it concerns me that he has such intolerant beliefs.
However, they are his beliefs and just as he respects our beliefs, is he entitled to respect for his beliefs even though they seem completely wrong to me?
Obviously this is DD's decision but it does concern me.
What does everyone else think?

But who is in detention? asylum seekers who have done nothing wrong by arriving by boat to seek asylum (and in most cases have done nothing wrong at all!), and have in fact, just exercised their rights!

The people in detention centres are not asylum seekers. They are people who applied for asylum and were refused. And yes, they normally have done something wrong. Applying for asylum when you don’t need it, lying and exploiting a system designed for those in huge need, discrediting it and bringing it into disrepute, is not just harmlessly exercising your rights.

I don't think that people have to have exactly the same political views to be together. I know two women who are fairly staunch lefties who have married Tory boy types - they challenge each other a lot, and have changed each others views on certain things, its quite interesting to watch actually!

However, far right is a different kettle of fish, if you are talking about an EDL/British First type. I could never go out with someone like that, I just couldn't. Apart from anything else, I would just think they were too thick.

Frankly, Danci you have no idea what you are talking about, detention is where processing happens, so they couldn't have been refused, in fact, very recently the US resettled people who were in detention on Nauru, they would have hardly done that if thy had failed their assessment, would they?

detention is mandatory in Australia for boat arrivals, all of them, and BEFORE their claim is assessed, so yes, they are asylum seekers, Australia simply refuses to take them in on the basis of discouraging people smuggling

there are children in detention, there have been deaths in detention, pregnant women have struggled to access care while in detention

it is an appalling and inhumane system, and I would urge everybody to seek more detailed information about what is going on in Australia, it is not hard to find

for example, have a look at this, it is accessible

www.researchgate.net/profile/Azadeh_Dastyari/publication/256056847_Detention_of_Australia%27s_Asylum_Seekers_in_Nauru_Is_Deprivation_of_Liberty_by_Any_Other_Name_Just_as_Unlawful/links/5564192808ae8c0cab36f7ea.pdf

I don’t think a relationship can go the distance if partners have totally fundamentally different world views. Can’t imagine how to navigate bringing up kids etc.

No-one is entitled to have their beliefs respected. This is not to be confused with a mandate to lay into someone at dinner/a propos of nothing.

Respect is extended to their right to hold those beliefs, i.e. I respect your right to think Hitler was right.

The moment someone opens their mouth is where I would draw the line because their belief is no longer safely confined in their addled heads, but out there ready to be discussed and thoroughly disrespected if necessary.

That’s in Australia. Not here.

Political opinions shape your attitude towards other people and underpin all your values. I would never ever date someone with far right views.

I’d ditch someone for being far right or far left. I don’t like extremism.

I would be concerned that, if she has leanings to the right, then hearing someone talk about things constantly could normalise it in her thoughts; that she might start to agree with some of the things he says

^^ This with bells on.

Petitepamplemousse

You have to be trolling, surely? Do you not see how laughably hypocritical and self-contradictory you are being? Saying everyone is NOT entitled to an opinion re politics unless it's along the same vein as yours, and then referencing the Nazis who thought the same thing you are saying.

Of course people are entitled to believe whatever the hell they like. I wouldn't want my children to date anyone far right OR far left, because I think both ideologies are dangerous. It really depends on his exact beliefs and whether or not he is just young and trying to find an identity using politics, as many do, or if he really means this stuff. It is difficult to date someone with different fundamental values though, and usually that does tie into political views.

echt

I strongly disagree with this - I think it's much better for people to say what they are thinking so that debate and discussion can happen. Shying away from debate and preferring to ignore people's opinions is the sort of attitude that ended up with Trump being elected! You shouldn't be allowed to police people's opinions like that. It seems well and good when the beliefs being policed align with your own, but what about when they don't? People on here would generally agree that racism, homophobia etc is wrong, but have no issues discussing trans issues. What about when that is widely accepted to just be transphobia, and people aren't allowed to discuss it for fear of being labelled phobic and intolerant? It's a really slippery slope.

crispy I'm finding it hard to read you read my post so I'll break it down.

Where have I said people shouldn't say what they think?

Jesus. Autocorrect.

1. Anyone can think what they want. I respect their right to think.
2. The moment they speak it's public, so open for debate.

Far, militant or fundamentalist anything is a no no for me. I feel very sorry for any children brought up by extremist parents of any kind.

I have a friend who was brought up by a racist DF. He used to tell them that the English were superior to everyone and them being blond meant they were the best. By primary school age her and her brother were throwing things at a house down the road screaming insults at the Spanish family who lived there. Telling them to get out of their country and calling them dirty etc. Their upbringing got them into trouble at school too.

Eventually her DM left their DF because he was also a violent alcoholic and they started mixing with people different to them. Her views changed. She’s now one of my best friends and I’m mixed race. She really resents her father not only for the violence but for tarnishing her world view with his twisted mindset. She sees that as being abusive also.

echt

Sorry, I misread your OP a little bit as people shouldn't say anything! Not sure why because having re-read it it's obvious what you are saying. Completely agree with you (sorry!)

Depends what you define as ‘far right’. It is a term that has been so abused it has become almost meaningless. To some on here voting conservative and reading the Daily Mail get you labelled ‘far right’ .

crispy

No one is entitled to respect for their beliefs but they are entitled to hold them. When people are very passionate about something like politics, i envision lots of arguing and frustration on both sides. It doesnt sound like a great atmosphere.

Dh and i support different parties and sometimes we debate but its never over dealbreaker issues. If i found out he was anti-choice or or pro something racist then it would be very contentious in our flat.

If your dd is holding back on her opinions then i would be worried. If she is challenging his then i would think it is less likely to work as a relationship but not be worried.

IT will be the drip, drip, drip of fascist bile until her "moderate" right wing beliefs chime with his. I'd be concerned and upset if my DC hooked up with such views. And all those people saying "everyone has a right, blah, blah, blah" there is no place in a civilised society for hate speech and violent views.

Erm what's the difference there Kursk?

Libertarian: individual liberty, small government, personal sovereignty and minimal taxation.

Liberal: progressive and social intervention by the government.

I think it depends what their beliefs are.
My first love totally ruined it for me by telling me that it was a real shame that I would be slaughtered 'when the revolution came.'

He is just as entitled to his views, however abhorrent they are as you all are. Who says you are right and he is wrong? He sees things differently and that is his right. It is called a "free country" for a reason.

I don’t understand this post. It’s utterly irrelevant yet people post like this time and time again. Bizarre.

No one said he’s not entitled to his views. Everyone understands it is a free country- why you even writing that?

It is perfectly normal to be disappointed and worried that your dd is dating a neo-nazi.

It is perfectly fine to dump a neo-nazi.

Free country innit.

Thanks everyone for your opinions- DH and I are going to discuss it further with DD but of course it is her decision. We don't want to push her further towards him by kicking up a massive fuss and cutting him off.

@Snugglepumpkin omg!!! Why on earth did he say that?