My chomping colleague

[Glowbuggy]

I work in a small office, only a few of us and EVERY SINGLE DAY, my colleague brings a bag of carrots to chomp on. I can’t even describe how loud her chomping is, and it makes me murderous with every single bite! How do I stop this without being an arsehole? I’ve tried hints about loud eaters, my misophonia and eating etiquettes. Hints don’t work! This is actually stressing me out and affecting my work 😢

"How do I stop this without being an arsehole?"

You can't.

Suck it up.

I know what this feels like! I personally have to leave the room if anyone starts doing this. It’s that or stay and stab them.

Can you wear noise cancelling headphones?

Just tell her, it doesn't make you an arse. Just say "is there anything less chompy you can bring to snack on because the carrot chompyness is really doing my head in!" She'll appreciate your honesty! I had a similar issue with a celery chomper... she now brings sliced peppers instead. Not silent but loads better!

It would annoy me too. Can you move desks, or turn yours so you don’t face hers? Headphones are a good idea. Be honest if she asks you why.

Send her photos of horses eating?

Bring in boiled carrots and switch them when she isn't looking.

What do you mean they've all gone soft and soggy?? I guess keeping them in your bag on your commute or in your desk draw isn't very good for carrots. Here, have a grape.

Or playdoh carrots

Change her screensaver to Bugs Bunny every single day

Use words? And verbalise your issue?

Boring, Trojan

Why is your first thought 'how do I stop her' and dropping hints rather than 'how do I work on my coping strategies for my misophonia'? Did the doctor that diagnosed it give you any information on those?

My misophonia is awful and getting worse.

BUT it's my problem so I have to leave the room rather than expecting anyone else to account for it.

I don't think it's reasonable to ask her to stop eating whatever she wants.

@pigeondujour When did the OP say she has misophonia, or even a diagnosis?

Many people are irritated by things without going to the GP about them.

If she's munching continuously you can't really leave the room every time she bites.

Head phones, and an explanation why is the way forward.

LynetteScavo Op said she has misphonia in her fourth sentence.

Is this the sort of job where you could wear head phones?

What about talking to your line manager? This is the sort of embarrassing conversation line managers are (in theory) trained to have with people - I had to tackle a colleague about their B.O. once. Gaaaaah but has to be done.

Wear headphones. Try and be jokey about it if she asks as this is your problem, and I don't think she should be made to feel self-conscious.

BTW- misophonia isn't an official psychiatric condition, and as such isn't diagnosable.

Urghh I've been in this situation, I feel your pain. Chomping should be made illegal IMO. I used to to from nice friendly person so sighing, agitated superbitch. I started wearing headphones! I'm blessed that in my new job I sit with other misophonics, total bliss!!

Start calling her Black Beauty /Shergar??

What about talking to your line manager? This is the sort of embarrassing conversation line managers are (in theory) trained to have with people - I had to tackle a colleague about their B.O. once. Gaaaaah but has to be done.

I think if I was the line manager I’D be the embarrassed one. B.O. is an issue that affects a whole office and is universally considered bad manners at the very least (I’ve had more than one job where the behavioural policy has specifically address it). Asking someone to stop eating something as innocuous as raw carrots - odour-free, no chance of spillage - because one person doesn’t like the sound would not go down well.

I would speak to her. I'd be super polite and would admit to having a thing about noise from people eating food but ask her to stop.

Does you office have any guidance about eating at your desks?

I can't stand it when my husband eats strawberries. Sometimes I stick my fingers in my ears. It's awful. It doesn't bother me with other foods but strawberries...: I suspect if he ate raw carrots I would have to get a divorce.

Just accept that working alongside people always has its irritations - things you do probably annoy other people too.

You're only option is to get your own bag of carrots and eat them at the same time and drown her noise out.

Tis the reason i eat crisps at lunchtimes...

I know the pain, colleague eats biscuits every.single.morning. for breakfast. I've learned to ignore, but DS knows to sit on the opposite side of the room if he's eating crisps.

Headphones.

Oh My god I'm getting the rage just thinking about it. Can you listen to music with headphones on to drown it out?

I sympathise op. My colleague has terrible misophonia which is a symptom of generalised anxiety. She also happens to be very good with people and when she had this problem with our mutual colleague, The Coleslaw Chomper, she tackled it directly. She explained how unwell it was making her and fully accepted it was irrational but could not cope with it any longer. Mutual colleague no longer snacks on coleslaw and with grace and equanimity. I couldn't have handled it so well as I'm terrible at confrontation but it is possible.

Surely colleague is turning orange by now?

Lots of Oompa Loompa comments and merchandise should sort this speedily.