to ask what you would do if...

[user7469322]

...your husband had another woman’s hair on him?

Bit of a brief story to go with this.

Husband was out all weekend at a convention.
Took female friend, brother and uncle.
Husband and friend spent a lot of time together.
He had to drive her home (30mins both ways) half way during the convention and back again (eye problem)
He arrived home late Sunday p.m with a long hair stuck to his sweater
Was a bit cagey when I pointed it out and removed it
Was all over me the rest of Sunday like a rash

AIBU to ask what you’d think/say if this was you and your husband/partner?

I remember your other thread too. Have you got legal advice yet? I doubt this started out as anything other than a hobby, but if it hasn't crossed the line yet, it probably will before too long.
The hair isn't a problem, long hairs cling to everything. The rest of it is awful, especially treating you like you are imposing in your own home.

OP, if she stays up so late at your house, next time when it is about 21:00 ask your H "are you done yet? We can we watch a movie?". If he looks surprised you do the same and say "I am bored, you can't expect me to stay up all by myself ". And if she looks as if she is finally going home (which I doubt) tell him "and pleaaaase, don't turn a 10min drive to a meeting as I am getting bored".

I am shocked that what most posters got from your OP was the single hair, which in itself is ridiculous but ignored his suspiciously close behaviour the next day.

Thanks for comments. Sorry it was vague. Didn’t want to spoil too much incase of outing and the fact the post won’t be deleted.

@DontDribbleOnTheCarpet

I’ve been to the cab.

sometimes she’s here till 2am and that’s too late for me especially if I need to be up at 7.15 fir the school run.

And your DH? Is he getting up in the morning? If he gets to lie in every day maybe it's time he started splitting the school runs with you...

Yet another fully grown adult obsessed with gaming. I find it unbelievable how common this is. Get rid of the pathetic man-child asap.

OP, are you Dr Foster?

Maybe the root cause of this is the discomfort of having someone in your home every night and feeling excluded due to the gaming.

I'm struggling with it though. For me the issue is less is he having an emotional affair more he seems totally uninvolved in family life. If you've several kids and he sits gaming every night, that's shit. Does he not have a job?

@CristalTipps

Usually his head is stuck under a pillow filtering out the noise of the kids getting ready. Completely ignoring my requests fir help.

@GruffaIo

Yeh I’m dr foster

@Bluntness100

Yes, full time job. 90% working from home.

If I stood next to your husband there's a very good chance he'd be wearing at least one of my hairs.

His total lack of commitment towards his own wife and children, his own blood is so very depressing

And please OP, don't metnion him the hair as he will find an excuse to call you everything you have already been called on this thread and much more. I think you already know what is going on anyway.

For what its worth I had a similar situation which involved just one long blond hair but my gut was telling me something was wrong with this picture. I was told what an idiot/crazy/paranoid person I was because of this one hair. Turns out he was cheating.

My hair falls out all the time. I have not yet noticed strands of it on any of my friends though.

Well to me there is a much bigger issue here and I'm surprised your focus is on whether he is having an emotional affair or not. For me it would be his lack of involvement in family life which would be a deal breaker. No way I'd want my husband sitting gaming every night with his mates, especially not if we had kids.

It's very strange, from both of you, I have to say.

The hair is a red herring, mine gets everywhere.

BUT, this woman is coming into your home and they are both treating you appallingly by the sounds of it. It looks suspicious to me. Even if it’s not, the fact that their relationship is making you feel like this, should be enough for it to stop.

My DH had a crush on another woman last year. I confronted him, they haven’t been in contact but it has massively affected the way I feel about him, so much so that I ended up changing my will over it (I owned my own property before we met and have DC from previous relationship) and I still have a contingency plan if it ever happens again.

Trust your instincts, do something about this situation and don’t let it eat away at you.

Er, I'd be suspicious. I never end up with random hairs all over me. He's obviously been close to her.

She's there till 2am?

Yeah,that's not gonna work.

A hair on dh’s coat? I would think nothing of it. On a previous boyfriends coat.... evidence of what I already knew. If you trust him and know him and he wouldn’t behave like that, you wouldn’t be posting this. I’ve had a man in my life, very nearly married him, who was NOT to be trusted. My husband? I 100% KNOW he wouldn’t be unfaithful.

Only you know, OP.