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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

to not get the morning after pill?

131 replies

Sidalee7 · 04/06/2018 19:45

Argh! Had sex on Saturday and used the withdrawal method. Just checked my dates and I would have been at my most fertile - day 12.
I really, really don't want to get the MAP, I hate the thought of it but I really don't want to be pregnant. Anyone ever got pregnant from withdrawal? I'm in my late 30's.

OP posts:
DameLillyTillicut · 04/06/2018 20:11

Oh x-post sorry. If it's not for you, it's not for you.

Griefbacon · 04/06/2018 20:11

The MAP is a must here if you don’t want a baby and even then isn’t guaranteed. Copper coil was great contraception for me until husband got the snip

Shiftymake · 04/06/2018 20:12

Remember talking to a mum in her 40s, she was sterilized so her last addition was a huge surprise! Anything is possible when sex is in the picture, MAP would be better then risking an unwanted pregnancy.

DanielCraigsUnderpants · 04/06/2018 20:15

If you're going to take the MAP do it sooner rather than later. You're already nearly 48 hours in and efficacy reduces as the time goes on.

I also used the withdrawal method. Took the MAP. And was pregnant but miscarried early on. Everyone's body is different but if being pregnant is a no no for you please don't put yourself through that

Tawdrylocalbrouhaha · 04/06/2018 20:16

If you genuinely don't want to be pregnant, you take the MAP.

shutthedoorbob · 04/06/2018 20:17

My coil hurt the second time I had one put in (first time was not long after I'd had a baby so was easier to get it in) but it hurt a lot less than giving birth lol.

donquixotedelamancha · 04/06/2018 20:18

Anyone ever got pregnant from withdrawal?

Many, many, many people.

I should make contraception more of a priority but no condoms/a lot of wine made me feel invincible (until the morning)

What a coincidence, they all said that.

But I want to weigh up the risks.

The chance is relatively low, no way to quantify it without more info about your fertility, but your 2% guess is probably the right ballpark. Thing is, it's a small chance of a very large danger, hence the actual risk of not taking the pill is large.

Been where you are, trust me: be a grown up- take the bloody pill.

specialsubject · 04/06/2018 20:21

so many on mn think withdrawal is contraception, scary really. you are ruining a good shag to no benefit.

Foodylicious · 04/06/2018 20:23

Is you being late 30s relevant because you might actually want to be/get pregnant?

If not, then I would get the MAP but unless you go to a 24hr pharmacy tonight, by the the time you get it tomorrow it will be alot less effective.

angryburd · 04/06/2018 20:23

"Anyone ever got pregnant from withdrawal?"

Fucking hell.

jade9390 · 04/06/2018 20:24

It is pretty simple, if you do not want to be pregnant, take it

OutsideContextProblem · 04/06/2018 20:30

It is a form of contraception, it’s just a fairly unreliable one. That figure of 22 women in a hundred pregnancy after a year of using withdrawal with average levels of competence is not good at all, but it’s a lot better than the 80 who’ll be pregnant after a year of using nothing.

Fruitcorner123 · 04/06/2018 20:30

You haven't really explained why you don't want to take it.

mimibunz · 04/06/2018 20:31

How can you not know the answer to this at your age? Ffs!

Mumoftwoyoungkids · 04/06/2018 20:32

I don't want to be pregnant. But I want to weigh up the risks.

Ok - this is what I’m good at!

Annually 22 out of 100 women get pregnant every year. You have roughly used it for a month (as it is the bonk during ovulation that counts!) So

1 - 0.78^(1/12) = 1 - 0.9795 = 0.0205.

So your 2% chance was pretty bang on.

According to this random site that I felt solely by googling (ie I have no idea if it is accurate or not) tonic.vice.com/en_us/article/3kk78v/youre-screwed-if-you-wait-too-long-to-take-plan-b

Between 24 and 48 hours it is 85% effective. Between 48 and 72 hours it is 58% effective. As you are probably pretty much bang on the 48 hours if you take it pretty quick then you are probably somewhere between those two figure. So maybe 70% effective.

So....

Don’t take it - 2% chance of pregnancy (1 in 50)
Do take it - 0.6% chance of pregnancy (1 in 167)

Does that help?

laptopdisaster · 04/06/2018 20:32

Depending on how old you are, the pills available in your late teens may have been SC4 which made everyone puke. EllaOne, which would be the right one for you now, doesn't make you feel sick.

Leopoldstotch · 04/06/2018 20:33

Jesus calm down mimi it's not that serious Confused

NorthernLurker · 04/06/2018 20:35

If pregnancy would be a disaster you would probably be better with a coil. Getting a bit late for the map 48 hours plus afterwards

Anotherdayanotherdollar · 04/06/2018 20:38

Anyone ever got pregnant from withdrawal?

No, I hear its foolproof. said no-one ever

Freddiepurrcury · 04/06/2018 20:39

The copper coil is an emergency contraception option as PP say however it does often make your periods heavier.

mirialis · 04/06/2018 20:41

Take the MAP and grow the fuck up. Did you not read any of the debate over abortion law recently, and all the people saying how abortion should be banned because women use it as contraception?

Take the MAP.

FASH84 · 04/06/2018 20:41

@Mumoftwoyoungkids just wanted to say I really enjoyed your maths. It's like a MN version of Radio 4's more or less!

Mumoftwoyoungkids · 04/06/2018 20:44

Fash

Thanks. I love that programme too!

Irksomeness · 04/06/2018 20:51

OP, I think you should take the pill. It’s only a small risk that you might be pregnant but it’s too big a risk to take.

BlueJava · 04/06/2018 20:53

MAP isn't anything like as bad as it used to be. If you don't want to be pregnant take the MAP.