To despair? Please tell me positive stories of your DC whose A levels went horribly wrong.

[MargoLovebutter]

DS is going to tank his A levels. I’m not exaggerating or hedging my bets or anything like that. He is going to do really badly.

I’m struggling to understand how a boy who is academically able and hasn’t gone off the rails is going to do this badly but that’s another topic.

He needs 3 Bs for his uni course (biochemistry) and realisticly, he is looking at 1 B if he is lucky in music and there is a strong possibility that he won’t scrape Ds in two of his subjects: biology and chemistry! He is getting Es in all the practice papers and the teachers assure me they aren’t marking harshly.

He is despondent and I’m worrying myself into a small hole.

Please can I have some stories about DC who turned around from doing much worse than they were expected to.

I got A's and B's at GCSE, and then got to college and a levels and went quite a long way off the rails. I quit college two months before my a level exams, because I was predicted D's and F's. I told my mum I was quitting, and she said fine, but if you want to live here you have to get a job. I managed to land an entry level job with the civil service. That job was the making of me, I got promoted 4 times over 12 years, did my a levels in the evenings eventually, then left to travel to the US for four years. I went to university in San Jose California, then came back to the UK and am now doing a second degree with the open university for the fun of it. At no point have I ever regretted leaving college, I've had to work hard since, I didn't take the easiest route sometimes, but it was definitely the right choice for me.

Some people really don't take to A levels and (at least in my day) they required a person to have very good exam technique as well as understanding of the subject, maybe even more so.

I also knew a lot of people with poor or modest A levels who did well at uni and people with all As who went to pieces.

Write it off. Find a way of getting him to love biology again if he even wants to. By the sounds of it he really doesn't any more.

I think 17/18 is a really silly age to choose something you want to do for the rest of your life. The rest of us don't figure it out until late 20s if not mid 30's.

At 17 I wanted to be a solicitor. College knocked that out of me within 4 months. I hated everything about AS levels and A levels. The teaching method was totally different to GCSEs and the teachers were awful.

I instead got a full time job at 17 and by the time I was 25 I was a national H&S and Facilities manager for a bluechip company with billion pound turnovers and I now have several other qualifications that are more relevant and important to the real world.

I did however jack it all in at 28 and took a few years off to figure out what I wanted to do. I got pregnant instead though and decided to retrain in a totally different field.

I now have potential earnings of £43kpa and that's accounting for 2 months 'annual leave' if I want to take it.

I don't do this at the moment though. I'm focussing on my son for now but still do some part time and earn enough for pocket money and holidays.

My dentist said that when he went to pick up his (first) A-level results he was met by the head: "Harrison," he said. "I thought we were going to be looking for a new goal keeper next year. We're not. See you next year."

I know someone who did terribly in her AS levels, then moved from our grammar school to a college to re-do them and then went on to A level there. She didn’t do well then either. But she managed to get on to a foundation / access course at a god university. She then went on to study genetics there. She got a 2:2 and then didn’t know what to do with her life. Realised she’d always wanted to be a doctor, but had always thought she couldn’t do it as not academically bright enough. She worked for a time as a carer on their staff bank, (so zero hours contract), while also studying for her GAMSAT. She did the exam a couple of times before she got a high mark and got interviews at some medical schools. She is now, finally, studying medicine and about to go into her final year.

Another person I know TANKED his a levels but got into university based on his sports ability. If your ds is musically able, he might get a place somewhere that way? Even if he has to take a gap year first.

Sometimes it can be a case of adjusting to new teachers - and in my view whether the subject is liked really depends a lot on the teacher. One DS had a terrible time with physics but maths and other subjects pretty good - I went to see his teacher with him and found I counldn't understand his English that well due to the teacher's accent. My DS said "Well I didn't like to say!" I quickly found him an excellent tutor and now he seems to have turned it around with her help.

Regarding success stories - no A Levels myself (left school too early) but did a foundation at Uni in Electronic Eng and got a first class BSc in Computer Science. Have since got an MSc and MBA... good luck to your DS.

It's not the end of the world OP. It really isn't.

DS2 who got As and Bs in hIs GCSEs bombed spectacularly in his A levels and came out with a D in geography. He seemed to struggle right the way through 6th form and the Assistant Head at the time explained there is a world of difference between GCSEs and A levels, and also said some boys are just not mature enough to cope with the transition. We were told science and maths were particularly difficult subjects at A level.

DS2 went to college and did a public services course for 2 years, where he excelled and and got distinctions across the board, getting more UCAS points in his first year than in the whole of his 2 years in 6th form.

He graduated from Manchester Uni last year and is now working for the NHS.

DS academically very bright but hated school (marginal Asperger). Eventually dropped out of A levels. lived at home, worked in a shop, saved up, moved away, got a job in a call centre in a bank, now doing really well: happy, independent and stable. Our education system is round-holes-only: great if you are a round peg but best to move out of it and take a different route if you are anything else.

If he really doesn't like Biology and is also struggling with chemistry, it's maybe time for him to have a rethink about what he wants to do. Biochemistry isn't easy... I did Chemistry at uni and had done very well at A-level and got a first in the end but I absolutely hated the Biochem modules and did badly in them.
You say he is academically able and he hasn't gone off the rails so there must be something else causing the lack of progress - maybe he has just chosen the wrong subjects and his talents lie elsewhere.
There are lots of stories on here of people who have gone on to be very successful - my cousin wanted to do something related to Biology but struggled with the Biology in Year 12 and ended up changing subjects. She now has a fantastic career after getting a first in a completely different field. A friend completely flunked her A-levels and didn't get in to Dentistry but she got a place on a speech therapy course through clearing at a uni not highly related but has ended up in a managerial role as well as doing research into aspects of speech and publishing papers.
Just see what happens in the summer and then look at the options with him. Someone else upthread said these things that look like disasters are actually a blessing in diguise.

I was told by my daughter's housemistress that she was going to fail ALL her exams and that she would then have to leave the school,as they didn't allow children to stay with failed GCSE results. She got an A*, mostly Bs and a C. To say I wanted to go and shove the results in that vile woman's face was an understatement!

My niece got an E in one of her GCSE's that she was predicted an A in and her friend was predicted an A* and got a C. After months of hassle they all got remarked and all was ok.

Not A levels as in Scotland but I failed two out of three highers in one year (we do highers in 5th year with a second set the year after).
TBF the history teacher was so crap that only three people in a class of 28 passed and there was a big investigation.

Anyhoo - I enrolled in evening classes, passed what I needed (fantastic teacher who got more across in one lesson a week than others at my school had in five lessons a week) and actually got a better grade than needed for uni.

Not A- levels, but DS2 did appalling in his GCSEs last year (only 1 C grade). I was besides myself with worry last August when the results came out (in fact I believe I started a thread very similar to this one).

Anyway, he went to college and did a level 2 course in a subject he really enjoyed and is now ready to start a 2 year, level 2 course in September.

With your DS, the most important thing is that it's not that he's not working or has gone off the rails, it's just that the course is not right for his learning style. If he doesn't get what he needs for uni he can talk to the college and get some advice on what course to do next year that will suit him better and reapply for uni.

There's really no shame with doing an extra year, they don't need to 'keep up' with their year group (heard this so often!) Many teens take a year or so out before uni, it's totally fine. Just keep supporting him and don't put too much pressure on him. It'll all work out!

Sorry for rambling post... on a teeny phone

I know lots of kids who bombed their A levels.

It has been bad for some of them who have ended up doing nothing jobs. but it's not been an issue for others. The fact yo r son is clever even if he is underperforming is massive. That 'cleverness' isn't going to go away.

I've had friends kids bomb A levels then go to crammer colleges and do brilliantly. It's very expensive though and you son would have to be on board.

Other kids who have bombed have ended up at lower lever Universities but have then aced their time their time there - getting firsts and excellent work placements etc. Once you get a solid first degree then you can switch to a much 'better' degree for a masters.

I've hardly known any kids say they ended up at the wrong uni. It's also not the least bit unusual to go to Uni in your early 20's rather than straight from school.

I don't know much about apprenticeships etc but there are lots of other options.

I think it's important to make sure your son still know there are lots of opportunities for him to progress. He might be feeling absolutely awful and be thinking he is a complete 'failure'. - it's not good for young lads to feel like that.

You live and work a LONG time in life. Messing up exams at 18 doesnt have to matter.

BTW - I've four DC who have gone on to do difficult things at Uni (medicine, maths PhDs etc etc) and they all say that A'levels were the most stressful and were hard.

It's very much a student's market out there at the moment - I'm a sixth form teacher and lots of my students have received unconditional offers (the most I've ever seen) and lots of uni's are letting students in with less than the required grades. This seems to be because of there being so many other options now like degree apprenticeships etc.

Ps. I literally couldn't face doing A-Levels when I was 16. I got a job, and when I was 19 started my degree part time. Got s first class honours degree, then did my pgce and then my Masters! And I've never done a-levels

If he is hating biology then maybe a rethink in terms of what he wants to do may be best? Clearing may throw up something unexpected that appeals to him, or a year out with resits may give him breathing space.

My DH did badly in his A levels and missed out on the uni places he really wanted, took a year out and worked, went to uni, worked overseas, did a Masters and has had a good career.

He could take a year out, work to earn some money, and resit at an exam centre next year? Doing so badly this year might give him the kick he needs!

Alternatively he can apply through clearing to a uni course that will take him (though he might struggle with a B and 2 Es to get much). If he is flexible about the university and the course it could be ok.

Or he could look into careers which don't involve a degree - there are plenty and often well paid!

The main thing is for him to do as well as he can now and then assess his options when the dust has settled. He's still very young and has a huge range of options - poor a level results really don't mean his life is over!

Is a degree in biochemistry really for him if he has grown to hate biology?

Maybe he has lost focus because his interests have changed and he is realising he doesn't want to study some of these subjects more deeply. There seems to be a large discrepancy between his music and the other two grades.

Maybe it's time to have a chat with him about where his interests and passions truly are?

I totally, totally fluffed mine but my second choice Uni still took me!! Keep encouraging him to do his best and that whatever the outcome you’ll help him sort it when results arrive......people get obsessed with a particular Uni....there’ll be options when the time comes!

I'd also add that I think it's better to take a year out and reassess and try something different than it is to push onto a degree course if that isn't what he really wants to do.

I was going to flunk the whole lot after doing particularly well at GCSE (mostly As). I ended up pulling out of college just before the exams. My parents were horrified. I was led to believe by them, the college, anybody that thought that they were entitled to an opinion, that I’d never get very far without sitting the exams and resitting if necessary.

They were all so wrong

I went straight out to work and gained a wealth of experience in admin, finance and HR by working for big companies. Due to great GCSEs I went to uni as a mature student and gained a good honours degree. I paid for it myself because I was working and as a result have no student debt. I’m now an HCP For the NHS but also own and run my own business in something unrelated and employ staff. Plan is to do a masters at Oxbridge in the next 2 years. I owe almost all of my success to not sticking with college and going out and getting the experience I needed from the real world.

Thank you all so much. It is really encouraging to hear these stories. I am so stressed and you've really helped.

I think maturity is a massive issue. He has Aspergers, so is very behind on his emotional development. He definitely won't be doing Biochem anywhere now, so it probably wasn't the right course for him anyway. To be honest I'm not even sure how well he'd cope at Uni, but he seemed set on it as the right course of action, so I have supported him with that decision and he seemed to interview well and got offers from good unis.

It is hard watching him come undone at the moment. I know that life is full of twists and turns and things don't always go to plan but as a bit of a rigid, inflexible thinker he is struggling big time with all of that.

A levels are a HUGE step up from GCSE's and with my three it was clear that 2 of the 3 would not cope with this. Eldest went to FE college (which was allowed then!) and youngest went on to do BTEC

Its easy to say when its not your child but please dont stress too much - or allow him to stress too much. Hes very young still, at the very start of his life, he has plenty of time to try lots of different avenues, lots of different careers, he doesn't HAVE to go to university at 18! I know many people who themselves and their children have taken 1, 2 or even 3 years out, getting a job, earning money, not necessarily in their chosen field but just getting work experience and living . Those are the ones who get way more out of uni and find that their work experience actually helps them study better.

Unfortunately our education system is set up as a one size fits all (which I guess it has to be!) and not everyone fits that size.

Good luck!

My brother. As and Bs at GCSE, then Ds at A level. He never really talked about what the problem was, as there was no doubt that he had been bright enough to do better, but just couldn't motivate himself to study at all.

Took a gap year, worked in retail, got himself onto a foundation degree course in science (his A levels weren't in science subjects) and discovered he really enjoyed the chemistry elements of his course. Got accepted to a chemistry BSc course at a Russell Group university and graduated with first class honours. Then applied to study medicine as a post-graduate, and is now a junior doctor. A long road, but it really did just take him a bit longer to figure out his real interests and strength.

Me. Did well in GCSE's but A, C, D in A-level. I didn't want to go to uni anyway though. I did some temping for a year whilst I completed AAT and then worked my way up. I'm not high flying, because I don't really want to (maybe DD is older), but I'm finance manager at 25 with over national average wage so doing alright.