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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

AIBU bloody “dog people”

711 replies

mumof2exhausted · 03/06/2018 17:05

Ok so I know there are some decent, responsible dog people out there but AIBU to say that there are some absolute arseholes who genuinely don’t seem to understand that not everyone loves dogs?? My 4 year old was recently bitten by a random dog so understandably is little nervous around them. A huge dog has just ran after him in the park (double the size of him) and he was petrified. Dog obviously thought he was playing game of chase. I don’t blame the dogs, I blame the owners. They didn’t call him off immediately just laughed and shouted “oh he’s just being friendly”. This happens all the time. Another big dog jumped up and pushed over my 2 year old couple of weeks ago. And no sorry or anything. Again a “he’s just being friendly ha ha” and off they walked without so much as a backwards glance to check my crying 2 year old was ok. I don’t have a dog but if I did and this happened I would be mortified and would apologise immediately and dog would go straight on a lead. Nearly lost my shit today with the owners but honestly don’t think they would have even cared.

OP posts:
Beansonapost · 12/06/2018 20:39

How can you prove I gave your out of control dog chocolate deliberately?

I was having a picnic and it ran over and ruined it...

Good luck proving my family and I weren't having or intending to have that chocolate.

You deserve the hefty vets bill for having your animal ruin other people's enjoyment of a public space!

I kicked an out of control animal who as far as I could tell was a threat to a one year old. Doesn't matter if it wasn't a threat or is friendly... my instinct said protect your child, so I did.

And yes I'm a charmer Smile.

I would never kick a docile dog, but I'd be sure to give you a piece of my mind about keeping the animal under control.

You love your dog, I don't & I shouldn't have to tolerate your rudeness and invasion of "my space". These are the reasons I go out of my way to avoid dogs! I cross the road when I see people with dogs!

ChardonnaysPrettySister · 12/06/2018 20:47

Those of you revolted by being licked by a dog, have you ever considered the kind of bodily fluids on every single surface you touch every single day?

Train doors, traffic light buttons, door handles, supermarket trolleys or baskets, tube and train seats and so on.

Being licked by a dog is nothing compared to that.

reallyanotherone · 12/06/2018 21:02

Being licked by a dog is nothing compared to that

I always want to say ORAL SEX to people who witter on about animals being unhygenic :). As for anal sex..... you think it’s sterile up there?

CoteNoir · 12/06/2018 21:05

albafloss Serious question, are you capable of reading? I mean, do you actually read anything before you respond or are you always so clumsy with your replies? I've already quite clearly stated my dog is always under control, did you miss that bit? Did I at any given point say my dog wades through picnics? Next time you want to fire off a factually inaccurate and poorly written response, stop and read the post a second time before you type.

As a dog owner, I can guarantee that myself and other dog owners are in environments where adults, humans and dogs will merge several times a day I will be in these environments significantly more often than someone who does not own a dog, because of course owning one naturally requires you to spend more time at parks, nature reserves and outdoors in general. This is why I can say with certainty and accuracy that the majority of dog owners are very considerate people, because the rare occasion I see a dog out of control is just that, RARE. I completely agree that dogs should not be permitted to approach others without the owner checking that it's OK first, but surely that is common sense. It certainly is for all the many, many dog owners I know and encounter daily. I won't, however, allow myself and all the other responsible owners out there to be lumped in with the minority of owners who are less considerate by a group of people who clearly simply cannot be bothered to accept their dislike of dogs might contribute to their perception of the situation. And let's be honest, most of the posts on here are from people who have a wide and unscrupulous distaste for all dogs, regardless of how responsible their owner is.

Would you like to know what is much more likely to ruin a picnic than an over-friendly dog? A loud, noisy, shrieking child allowed to run "out of control" by it's parents. Children thoughtlessly and inconsiderately kicking footballs into people's picnics. Toddlers, allowed to totter over to your picnic and clumsily topple into your midst upsetting your goods whilst their beaming parents watch on indulgently because little Timmy is so sweet and surely everyone adores their child? Judging from the responses on here perhaps next time an unwanted child comes over, unwatched by their parents, they should be treated in the same way that a pp has treated someone else's beloved pet. A swift, knee-jerk reaction is called for surely rather than taking a split-second to assess the situation with a rational head? But isn't it just amazing what parents are allowed to get away with, all under that useful blanket excuse of "parental instinct".

And for the record, children who grown up in dog owning households have been repeatedly shown to have stronger immune systems, fewer allergies and a more active, outdoorsy lifestyle I can guarantee you those children will have at some point received a friendly lick to the hands or face whilst playing with the dog. Might be worth thinking about the benefits of healthy immunity before you start shrieking about germs.

Thesearepearls · 12/06/2018 21:10

May I sum up?

Dog lovers maybe don't take enough care over people who may be phobic about dogs. Dog lovers maybe can be irresponsible about their dogs and their dog shit and their dog saliva

But dogs are generally good and loving and can add to families. And kids/people who are scared and/or phobic about dogs should be helped and supported because like it or not there are loads of dogs out there.

Can we just all make friends now?

CoteNoir · 12/06/2018 21:17

ChardonnaysPrettySister it really makes no sense. Presumably the type of people who have no concept of what germs actually are and the role they play in keeping you healthy?

I'm very house-proud and keep an immaculate home, but some of the reactions to dog licks on here make it very clear why allergies and health problems are on the rise in children who are not exposed to healthy bacteria.

aaronburr · 12/06/2018 21:24

I've heard it all now. Allergies are on the rise because people don't want their children to be licked by random dogs.

Is there no limit to the lengths people will go to to justify the selfishness

ChardonnaysPrettySister · 12/06/2018 21:26

I certainly find the competitive revulsion strange.

Also, I find it very odd that a dog would just go round randomly licking people.

But what do I know....

aaronburr · 12/06/2018 21:26

I always want to say ORAL SEX to people who witter on about animals being unhygenic :). As for anal sex..... you think it’s sterile up there?

Well why don't you say it then? Is it because you know it's fucking stupid?

I assume you are talking about consensual sex. I do not consent to me or my child being licked by some random filthy animal.

PandaCub · 12/06/2018 21:27

Cotenoir I'm jealous. My house has a constant sprinkling of dog hair. I Hoover everywhere. I even Hoover the dog (he's cool about it). It can't be conquered.

I actually found a dog hair in my bra at the weekend. Confused it was a low point.

crazycatgal · 12/06/2018 21:29

@Beansonapost You'll soon stop kicking dogs when an owner turns around and does the same to you.

ChardonnaysPrettySister · 12/06/2018 21:33

I've heard it all now. Allergies are on the rise because people don't want their children to be licked by random dogs.

Just because you haven't heard about it doesn't mean it's not true.

Allergies are on the rise because of lack of contact with farm animals and dogs and because of the increase in use of cleaning products.

BasiliskStare · 12/06/2018 21:37

I shall post this again
BasiliskStare Tue 12-Jun-18 19:47:03
"In my experience, most dog-owners are arrogant, ignorant, clueless and selfish. "
I cannot speak for where you live but my experience is different.
I really should not have bothered replying should I grin

  • I would love to know where people live that they have pavements / paths etc covered in dog mess & they are daily bothered by a dog. But Hey ho. irresponsible dog owners should be treated as such. I cannot see a time soon where a well looked after dog with a responsible owner is not allowed. They are a joy IMHO - live and let live

www.spottedinely.com/coni-dog-helps-ely-st-marys-children-reading/

Wolfiefan · 12/06/2018 21:42

Random filthy animal?
And you wonder why your child is so scared of dogs? Hmm
On a thread about dogs the only rabid and frothing ones are the dog haters.
The actual dog owners have time and time again said how they go out of their way to ensure their pets don't cause a bloody menace, a mess or scare members of the public.
Be angry with irresponsible twats.
Stop being so rude about the rest of us and our beloved pets.

aaronburr · 12/06/2018 21:44

This reply has been deleted

Message deleted by MNHQ. Here's a link to our Talk Guidelines.

Wolfiefan · 12/06/2018 21:46

My "beloved pet" is a well trained dog who wouldn't go anywhere near you or your child.
You seriously can't see how your attitude to this animal may make your child more afraid of them? Really?

aaronburr · 12/06/2018 21:50

No, I don't. I do everything in my power to help DD. I remain calm, I reassure her, I distract her, I have bought her dog toys, books with puppies in, found films on Netflix about dogs. I do everything I can. It's a fucking nightmare living with her phobia and it's not my fucking fault.

BasiliskStare · 12/06/2018 21:55

aaron - most people do keep their dogs away from other people and children. Not your fault if your child is scared of dogs and may have had an experience which contributed to this. If it is a phobia then I get that. I could no more walk past a person taking a couple of tarantulas out for a walk on leads than fly. But , really , unless you live somewhere where there are a great many irresponsible dog owners , then I do think a little live and let live approach would be helpful. I bet most dog owners and their dogs you come across are trying to do that.

Wolfiefan · 12/06/2018 21:56

I didn't say it was your fault entirely but you can't imagine for a moment that she doesn't pick up on your hatred of dogs and that she isn't influenced by this.
Kids pick up on micro expressions. Changes in body language. Tone of voice. Etc etc.

BasiliskStare · 12/06/2018 21:57

& if it is a phobia - then I do understand that. I have one. I would love all spiders to be shot into space - aint going to happen , so I avoid them

rogueone · 12/06/2018 22:08

chardonnay you are correct about the increase in allergies. Research has shown that an increase in antibacterial products and an over the top attitude to cleaning has led to an increase in allergies. Although both my DS and dog have allergies and not to each other... I have spent the last ten years with my DS under the care of an allergy consultant so do feel able to comment. My allergic dog on the OH well that’s another story!

reallyanotherone · 12/06/2018 22:17

Research has shown that having more than one pet in the home reduces the risk of excema and asthma.

We have an awful lot of auto immune diseases around. As pp have said, some is linked to the over use of antibacterials and almost sterile living.

As an aside, i wonder if animals are ever allergic to humans?

Slanetylor · 12/06/2018 22:19

Allergies have increased because we’re too clean. You can choose how to introduce dirt and bacteria into your lives, pets, messy play in the garden, step disinfecting everything in your house, encourage nose picking , whatever floats your boat.

ChardonnaysPrettySister · 12/06/2018 22:25

Yes, and being in close contact with dogs and being licked them is great way to do that.

Also, stroking your dog has been proven to release oxytocin, the happy hormone and to help regulate blood pressure.

Having dogs also means regular walks and increased social contact, both beneficial for your health.

The only thing the buggers are bad for is your wallet.

Slanetylor · 12/06/2018 22:31

Dogs aren’t always great for social interaction. They allow isolated people the opportunity to say hello to other dog walkers but they don’t always allow deep friendships to develop.
Workmates who have to run home to walk their dogs miss after work social events. Relatives who can’t visit family who live further away ( or don’t want to or can’t afford to use kennels). My own relative has decided that her dogs are more important than a relationship with my daughter for example. She won’t put dogs out if we visit so I no longer do. She won’t visit here because she won’t put dogs in a kennel. We meet half way rarely for lunch but there’s no relationship there any more. I suppose I find it hard to see why you’d prefer to spend Christmas with your dogs than your family but that’s her choice and she’s happy- but it hardly increases her socialization.
But I know several people who have antisocial dogs. They seem to think it’s funny that their dogs keep visitors away.