To want more money

[yellowdaisiesgreengrass]

I know I am well off compared to most of the world and indeed country.

But as a single parent and have been since I had a three year old and a one year old, I just never have enough money.

I know I’m moaning. I just wish I could do more enjoyable things - always held back due to lack of cash.

There are many things you can do to get more money. Work more hours, get a second job, secure a promotion, move jobs etc.

It depends how much you want it and your work ethic.

Well, yes, and I have done two jobs in the past and have secured promotions but still, there’s a huge limit on what one person can do.

Try getting a plan in place with the overall aim "to earn more money" then break down the options you could do in order to get some, how you'd achieve each option.

Thank you - really though, that’s not exactly what I mean My earning powers are limited and even so, there’s only me.

Was speaking to a friend earlier and it just made me feel a bit low.

I think what people don't realise is that when you're a single parent, you pay the full cost of the bills, whereas if you're living with someone (and you're both working) you pay half. And yes, you get a bit off your council tax, but every other cost apart from food is the same.

I was in your situation; 24 with 2 toddlers kids and single - no contact with their father.
I worked in the NHS but pay is low (I know higher than many jobs but I considered it low considering how much my parents had and the life I was raised in).

I didn't want to settle for that, although I loved the work. I retrained in an artistic job that is always loved as a hobby and started my own business. I now earn around 16 times what I earned in my job. If I stuck with it, I'd have got promotions etc but would have capped out well before I reached the amount I earn now.

You don't need to settle.

Thanks hollow

I’m a bit older than you Roc and I’m sure you appreciate not everyone can set up an artistic business which earns you 16 times what you did.

We do ok. Small house, but it’s mine, old banger of a car, a few days out.

But. There’s a world out there I doubt I’ll ever see.

I’m sure you appreciate not everyone can set up an artistic business which earns
you 16 times what you did.

No........... but you can still put some effort in instead of moaning about it. If you are reasonably intelligent, determined and willing to slog your guts out for a few years, you can better your financial situation.

My ex boss was a single mum with minimal qualifications. She studied like mad to get qualifications in her desired field and now she’s a well paid manager.

Do some OU courses (I’m sure there are loans / grants to cover the costs). By the time your youngest is at school FT you will have a degree and can enter the world of work based on what you’ve been studying.

You need to focus on the positives in life and create experiences on the cheap

@yellowdaisiesgreengrass

It doesn't have to be that specific field you move into. But if you have something you're passionate about, and there's a way to build a career from, then it's never too late for that.

I didn't get successful overnight. I'm 29 now - it took 5 years but I had a loan from my parents to get it started. Without that loan, it would probably have taken around 8-10 years. I started on my own website, then I got into one shop, then some galleries, then 10 shops, then sent some images off to every stylist's email I could find until I started getting my pieces worn by celebrities. Then I was in hundreds of shops. But it took working 15 hour days, 5 days a week and living on 5 hours sleep. And it took non-stop determination. I know a lot of artists who are much better than me, but they don't put themselves out there so don't get the recognition. They're just happy to plod along.

My point was, if you're not happy then you can try things.

I do have a university degree and my job isn’t badly paid. However, it is one persons salary. That’s the rub of it really.

Can you still not do some more home based study with the aim of promotion / pay rise?

really though, that’s not exactly what I mean

What do you mean?

You are young enough to have toddlers so I’m going to guess you aren’t yet 50. Your childcare costs will reduce significantly in the next 4-5 years. You have a brain, you can put it to good use while your DC are so small creating a plan and putting steps in place to facilitate increasing your income once they are at school/a bit older.

With all due respect Roc I think the key thing in your post is the loan from your parents, not everyone can get this and not everyone can get a bank loan.

Two wages will always bring in more than one but you need to work out what is reasonable. You could be earning 100k but have high outgoings and it's not as much as two puerile earning 100k or you could earn 20k and have scope for earning more or you could be in a relationship and one of you unable to work and paying out fpr two adults

@BusterGonad

As I said, without the loan, it would have taken longer. My savings paid for all my training, equipment etc. The loan paid for my first advertising campaign to launch the business. Without that, I'd have had to do smaller campaigns and built up enough for a big push. Their loan allowed to a large campaign, which gave me a good first year and I paid back the loan and had enough to invest in all my new designs etc.

Without that loan, I'd have had a slower rise but would still have a successful business. It was definitely not the key point. Throwing money at something won't make it a success without the hard work the job actually takes.

Actually OP I think it's allowed to just have a loan.

DH and I are expecting our first child: were not rolling in money but we're comfortable, when working out future budgets for childcare etc one of the main thing that was obvious to both of us was how impossible it would be on one income.

It's just more of a burden. And yes, it is sometimes difficult seeing friends who can buy things easily when that's not your situation.

I do think it's worth thinking about some of the things you want and seeing whether they're potentially realistic in the future/ there are lower cost ways to achieve similar. A lot of our friends are v high earners and I've realised now we're financially stable there's v little I really envy: a lot of it is about choice and while we don't have anywhere near as much choice in some areas, we do now have enough disposable income we can buy some things we couldn't previously and being able to do that really strips any envy away.

Sorry- first sentence should be moan!

Ok you keep coming back to being a single parent. Was that through choice? Do the children have a father who pays maintenance? Does he have caring responsibilities, which frees up your time?

God, just let the poor woman have a moan!

I’d like more money too Yellow. Might nip out and buy a lottery ticket 🤣🍷

Does the father of your dc pay maintenance?

You can yanno, take in ironing or like be a childminder.

Just getting in there first before someone else does

You have your moan, it sucks doing it all yourself.

I know what your saying Roc but it's still an advantage. I get what you're saying Op, life can be hard.

There’s a world out there I doubt I’ll ever see.

That’s generally how it is for most people though.