WTAF? 'Using sex as a weapon'

[InspMorse]

I was waiting for my DC at an event yesterday and two young women (early 20s) sat close to me and started up a loud conversation.
There was a lot of laughter as each one described how they manipulated situations at home with their DPs/DHs. One said (word for word quote):
'You've got to use sex as a weapon... if I want him to do something for me, give me a lift, buy me something, take me out...He gets sex and I get what I want - it always works'

AIBU to think WTAF???
Do women really do this or is this unusual?

Some women do this. Lots don't.

It remind me of an episode of Frasier. Daphne accuses Frasier saying men use sex to get what they want...Frasier says "how can we use sex to get what we want? Sex is what we want"

Whatshall
Haha! It certainly wouldn't work for my DH!!

The vicar who married us essentially told us this was fundamental to a happy marriage. He even mentioned it in the ceremony. Was mortifying.

I think it works for some people. And I’m sure some people are also work to the assumption that if they do what their partner wants they’ll be ‘rewarded’ with sex too.

Actually seems a bit clinical to me.

I tried rewarding my partner for good behavior with sex.

But in the end I deside it was less effort to just do the housework myself

The vicar who married us essentially told us this was fundamental to a happy marriage. He even mentioned it in the ceremony. Was mortifying.

Wow.
I really don't want to believe that men are kind and thoughtful only when they are being 'rewarded'.

Grumpy
and more enjoyable??!!

As Woody Allen said "the most expensive form of sex is free sex"

Yes sex is often used to manipulate so is affection

For some it makes them feel powerful

Is it healthy to be in a relationship like this probably not

Ok, I think I kind of get it... You invest time, money into your relationship. You share your life, your family/friends, your home and by doing so, in return you have a 'loving' relationship?

Enthusiasm
Its the obvious (or not so obvious?) manipulation I don't like. Do men not see that they're being played?

.

I think it's a fundamentally unhealthy view, because it feeds into the idea that men are entitled to sex from women, though women don't like it. It's what underpins the mindset of all these scumbags who think that if they have been 'nice' to a woman often enough, she is not fulfilling her end of the bargain if she won't open her legs.

Horrible

It's a depressing idea, because it perpetuates the idea that sex is of its nature a thing that rampant men 'do to' passive, resisting or uninterested women, who have been socialised into trading sex they don't really want to have for commitment/a ring/money/security.

I think it's a fundamentally unhealthy view, because it feeds into the idea that men are entitled to sex from women, though women don't like it. It's what underpins the mindset of all these scumbags who think that if they have been 'nice' to a woman often enough, she is not fulfilling her end of the bargain if she won't open her legs

And yes, this.

Sex wouldn't work with my DH but chocolate would

How utterly depressing.

I think it's an unhealthy view that women have something men want (sex) and have to earn it as if it's some sort of prize.

And threads about lack of sex drive in women always prompts replies about how he should do more housework, take her out for a night or away for a weekend, give her a massage or a foot rub..

Replies on threads about being concious about your weight or appearence naked or shaving elicit responses about how he should consider himself lucky or grateful to see you naked or get near your genitals.

It can't just be me that thought of Pat Benatar when I read this, can it?

I’v never heard of it being phrased in terms of a man rewarding a woman with sex. Nope, always the other way round. As if a woman can’t just enjoy sex for its own sake, but as a means to an end (affection/ money/ help with something). Because a woman that just likes shagging, there must be something wrong with her, right?

Pretty worrying to hear this attitude from people born in Northern Europe in the ‘90s, or the vicar (assuming otherwise CoE-type)...

There was a thread on here once by a woman who offered her husband a blow job in exchange for a lift into town. I think she posted it as a lighthearted thread expecting to get giggly reciprocal stories but was met with pretty much universal revulsion.

It's what underpins the mindset of all these scumbags who think that if they have been 'nice' to a woman often enough, she is not fulfilling her end of the bargain if she won't open her legs

THIS ^

This is what men who justify using prostitutes say about women...that we use sex as a trading system anyway so might as well be honest and just pay directly for it.

Wouldn’t work in this house, I have a far higher sex drive than my partner... probably because he is so good at it...

He would be happy for twice a month, I want every day... we settle on once/twice a week