To feel shaken about this driving incident?

[Art3misZeee]

So, I’m a relatively new driver (R). Passed my test and had a gap of five months before getting my car (production error).

I’m still learning, I make stupid mistakes sometimes but I learn from them. Though this one really got me.

Was on the way back from dropping the kids off at specialist unit daycare on the left on a two lane one way road, not busy but there’s a huge truck in front of me that stopped suddenly and switched the hazard lights on.

Ok, I break but I’m a little close to the truck, reverse a little because the road is so narrow and hard to get around even more so with the size of the truck. Indicate right to go around truck, inches out a little and do all checks, fine and as I’m half way round truck the only other car who is a white Audi and a good bit away speeded up as soon as he saw me in order to not let me pass first.

This didn’t exactly work because if I accelerated to get around quicker I would have hit the truck but this guy came right up the back of me and started beeping. I literally had no where else to go. I pointed to the truck and motioned about reversing. He was having none of it so I was stuck between the truck and his car, which he kept moving forward.

I don’t know where he thought he could go to get around me because there was literally no room. So I had to go forward, when we got moving he moved into the left lane beside me and rollered down the window to start screaming at me. Saying I almost crashed into him 3 times. I drove on to the traffic lights ahead and he sat beside me in order to continue calling me a stupid bitch and how I needed to “Wise the fuck up and get off the fucking road”.

He sped off before I could compose myself enough to say anything. Honestly, who was wrong here? I understand he had priority but I had dictated and inches out early on, he was far enough away that I would have gotten around the truck in time so he wouldn’t have needed to slow down. It was only when he saw me he speeded and went right up the back of me this all happened.

I do have bad anxiety so this is going to be stuck in my head all day and i’ll more than likely agree with him that I shouldn’t be on the road because I feel shit.

Since we’re talking about safe driving. Could people please help out?

petition.parliament.uk/petitions/208008

Sorry, meant to add. This is to Increase the sentence for failure to stop after a fatal road traffic collision

Yes he shouldn’t have been so aggressive but I think I’d have been pretty incensed if someone pulled out from a standing stop and crawled out despite seeing me coming. She should have waited until it was clear.

I agree with this.

The OP did clearly stop too close and reverse to get round the truck.

Ok, I break but I’m a little close to the truck, reverse a little because the road is so narrow and hard to get around even more so with the size of the truck

The OP should have initially seen the truck was slowing down and overtaken, failing to do that she should have stopped with plenty of room, failing to do that she should have waited until the road was clear.

I misunderstood the thread completel. Dual carriageway in the op would’ve helped.

To be honest, shit happens. I live in a buy city and have to drive through it every day. It's mental, I have things like this happen all the time. You get used to it and need to learn not to get so shaken up every time something like this occurs. There are some idiot drivers on the roads.

Look you might have been in the wrong but every driver makes mistakes when they are starting out - and often long beyond that, too!

The other driver was absolutely awful but unfortunately there are a lot of awful drivers on the road. You just have to try to develop a thick skin; never get involved in an altercation, just move on.

Not too long ago I got followed for some distance by a driver who drove alongside me ie. wrong side of the road, screaming and gesticulating. Eventually I reached my driveway, pulled over and phoned police. My situation was a little similar to yours in that a bus stopped in front of me and I edged around it (restricted vision) and the angry driver came flying up behind me and wanted to go around me and bus. She was 100 percent in the wrong and in fact I can only think maybe she was on drugs because her reaction was so dangerous and extreme.

I've driven for years but I still found that to be unsettling. But it happens more and more frequently these days bc we have become more impatient and it seems as though there is a new underclass that simply has no concept of manners or appropriate behaviour.

Hello everyone,

Thank you for the advice, both constructive and supportive. I realize I was in the wrong when I drove too close to the truck and in that I should have waited for the Audi to pass before going around. I did genuinely think I had time but that was a misjudgment on my part which I can only learn from. I have booked a bulk set of lessons with my previous driving instructor, he was more than happy to help!

Yes I do have anxiety which goes hand in hand with another mental health condition. I can’t help it, troubled childhood and all that comes with the aftermath of it.

Next time, regardless of anyone shouting, I’ll wait and judge the situation appropriately instead of panicking. I’ll try to treat everyone as if they haven’t seen me, I like that mentality for driving. I hope I’ll gain a thicker skin later as I know sometimes road rage is there regardless of the slight.

So, you were so close to the truck you needed to very slowly edge around it into a fast moving lane of traffic, which you started doing with a car in view travelling at speed behind you. He (possibly, I don't see how you can judge this, especially when misjudging your distance to the lorry so much) increased his speed to clear the carriageway for you with out having to take evasive action himself however despite knowing a car travelling at speed was travelling in the next lane you continued the turn you didn't have room to make in one go, into his path, forcing him to come to a full stop.

You then needed to reverse to clear the lorry, causing now 3 vehicles blocking both lanes of a high speed road, and possibly meaning he also had to reverse?

Advise from the Highway Code is:

"If you need to change lane, first use your mirrors and if necessary take a quick sideways glance to make sure you will not force another road user to change course or speed. When it is safe to do so, signal to indicate your intentions to other road users and when clear, move over."

It really does not sound like you allowed enough distance between you and the lorry and you should have waited to come round the lorry until the Audi had passed, so he didn't need to break to allow you to make several adjustments to your position including reversing.

And we are shocked the Audi driver reacted to this why? What is the relevance that it was an Audi? Theres bad and aggressive drivers in all makes of car. I think most people faced with this situation would have had an adrenaline led reaction.

I agree that maybe some extra lessons, especially for dual carriageway driving might be in order but you need to let the emotions on this one go. I really don't mean to make you feel worse, sorry.

Cross post OP.

I'm glad you're ok. Please don't take his reaction to heart, tbh I would have reacted too because I would have been scared in his place if that makes sense.

I hope your lessons go well and you get more settled with driving. It took me a good while as I had bad anxiety about driving too, but the. more you do it there you settle and your judgements get better.

Un mumsnetty xx and a hug.

Next time, regardless of anyone shouting, I’ll wait and judge the situation appropriately instead of panicking. I’ll try to treat everyone as if they haven’t seen me, I like that mentality for driving.

Good plan - my dad used to tell me "driving a car is easy; it's all the other people on the road that make it so much more difficult".

I've been driving for nearly 30 years and may advice would be this - better to wait until you have no doubt that it's OK to go/pull out/park/overtake. Don't chance it as it's not just worth it.