When I was 17 and a virgin I dated a man older than me. I had decided to lose my virginity to him, but when he put his penis in me I decided I no longer wanted to. I asked him to stop straight away, but he just said ‘no’ and carried on until the end.
Later I found he had done the same and worse to other women.
It never bothered me, in fact I put it down to just one of those unfortunate things women have to go through, until a couple of years ago when it did start to affect me. I can still only discuss it IRL when drunk.
The other day I went to the cinema with my DS and the new mamma mia film was advertised; I had flashbacks to going watching the first one with all my family and being so happy and hopeful for the future then a couple of weeks later this happened.
I still feel immense guilt if I ever think or talk about this because I feel like I am over dramatising it and compared to what some women go through it’s nothing.
Thoughts?