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AIBU?

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Original poster

To think she’s faking?

670 replies

Appleofmypie · 27/05/2018 14:34

One of my team at work is 14 weeks pregnant. She’s been off sick for 5 weeks with severe hyperemesis and still has a week left on her sick note (she’s being signed off for 2 weeks at a time)

By complete coincidence she is Facebook friends with a friend of mine.

My friend has put some pictures on Facebook this morning of her Greek holiday she’s still on, and my work colleague is in most of them - sunbathing, eating, swimming in the sea, playing volleyball. She has obviously blocked me as she is tagged in the pictures but her name is unclickable.

I’m gonna sound like a complete cow but I think she’s faking her sickness.
She’s on full pay from work and we’re having to pay an agency temp to cover her work too. It’s a small company that is struggling and I doubt we’re going to make any profit this month due to this.

My questions are:

Should I tell/show our boss?
What evidence of hyperemesis does a GP need to see to sign you off or Could it just be on her say so?
Is she actually doing anything illegal?
I know that pregnancy sickness is covered separately to normal in terms of disciplinary but if it’s proven she’s faking could it still be gross misconduct?

Thanks

OP posts:
Teddybearonthewashingline · 27/05/2018 21:50

If she had blocked you you wouldn't be able to look at her page unless you went on another profile

llangennith · 27/05/2018 21:52

I couldn’t have gone anywhere when I had 24hour ‘morning sickness’ the first five months of my pregnancies.
Report her.

SteveMcGarrettsBudgieSmugglers · 27/05/2018 21:53

it is the op's concern if she is likely to loose her job first, she was right to send the information to her boss.

Original poster
Appleofmypie · 27/05/2018 22:03

She came into work, said ‘I’ve been signed off for 2 weeks as i have hyperemesis’ then gave the sicknote to our boss, who was standing next to me.

I am looking for another job but I do love my job!

The business was just about keeping its head above water but now the agency fees for the temp is adding to the worries. If colleague is actually well enough to be in work then the boss wouldn’t have to be paying these fees. I know for a fact that my boss isn’t paying herself a wage this month to compensate for this.

I don’t know what I want to achieve by ‘snitching’ or throwing anyone under the bus (Grin)
I just saw something that I didn’t think was right.

OP posts:
numptynuts · 27/05/2018 22:07

Good for you OP.

LetsGoFlyAKiteee · 27/05/2018 22:11

Maybe a considence but does seem a bit to much to be
Maybe she should've asked the friend not to tag her in photos..if you hadn't seen it someone else might have.

bitzy12 · 27/05/2018 22:14

From someone who currently suffers with hypermesis and has done in my previous 2 pregnancies...report her 100%.

A lot of us HG sufferers do our best to raise awareness for HG. It's people like this woman that make it look like nothing when actually it's hell on earth. I've never known anything compared to HG and others will agree x

RebootYourEngine · 27/05/2018 22:16

Good for you for letting your boss know what you saw. It is now up to the boss what they do next.

applesandpears56 · 27/05/2018 22:16

I agree bitzy - I couldn’t make a cup of tea - never mind pack, go on holiday and play volleyball!

bitzy12 · 27/05/2018 22:18

HG = hospital admissions. HG does not = to holidays to Greece. If you can get out of bed and do your daily routine, you don't have HG. If you can get on a flight and go on holiday.....ooo this makes me angry. You've done the right thing op

AngeloMysterioso · 27/05/2018 22:22

The fact that she came into the office and announced she had HG suggests to me she’s been fibbing from the start. From what I’ve seen of HG you can barely fucking move, much less go into work to hand over your sick note in person. A neighbour of mine had it at the same time I was signed off with depression a few years ago, I ended up picking her kids up from school and buying her groceries (willingly, fwiw) for over a month. In the end her DH had to take time off work to be with the kids as she had to go into hospital. She was very gravely ill. Think you did the right thing OP.

FlapAttack23 · 27/05/2018 22:22

When I had HG I didn't have the strength to.open the stair gates! I couldn't even watch TV or listen to TV as that make me sick. Sunlight made me sick. I lay in a dark room for months and one went 10 without a.full bath/shower 😂 I am.7 months post giving birth and am.still building back up. y fitness and ability to eat normally! If she had hg I don't think she would be in Greece no!

BakewellTart01 · 27/05/2018 22:25

Good for you OP. I had HG in my pregnancies. I spent more time in the hospital on a drip than at home. A holiday in Greece would have been a horrific prospect.

wineoclock1 · 27/05/2018 22:29

If you told your boss do you think he / she would let on to her that you were the source of the info? Would f/b screenshots have any link to you? If she wasn't fired and you had to continue working with here, it could be extremely awkward. Is there any way of letting you boss know without it being linked to you..

Joboy · 27/05/2018 22:29

Why is your boss paying a temp if the business is going down .

tenbob · 27/05/2018 22:30

I'd love to see the travel insurance quote for that and whether her doctor deemed her fit to fly.

But she is only 14 weeks
Any standard travel policy will cover any pregnant women with no pre-existing conditions. You don't even need to tell them, it's just standard cover

And you don't need a fit to fly certificate until you're past 30 weeks

reachforthewine · 27/05/2018 22:32

I had HG. I could barely lift my head off the pillow never mind get a flight somewhere.

I was really unwell with it and had a few hospital admissions because of it. Some days were better than others but I never had a full week of not being sick. I would sometimes have a couple of hours without being sick and that was progress.

Neverender · 27/05/2018 22:32

He's paying a temp and you're worried about the business and your boss but you're leaving too? Byob.

GladAllOver · 27/05/2018 22:35

Any standard travel policy will cover any pregnant women with no pre-existing conditions. You don't even need to tell them, it's just standard cover
But no travel policy covers you for pre-existing conditions. If she's been signed off for HG then she is not covered.
But of course if she is not actually suffering from HG then she won't be worried about having to claim.

GladAllOver · 27/05/2018 22:37

He's paying a temp and you're worried about the business and your boss but you're leaving too?

Whether the business is in trouble or not is irrelevant.
Would anyone say that the woman can be OK doing this if the business can afford it? It's just wrong.

dinosaurkisses · 27/05/2018 22:44

People commenting that OP is “snitching” or “throwing her under the bus” - seriously, get a grip. This isn’t school- colleague hasn’t been caught cheating on a maths test, she’s potentially defrauding her employer and putting other people’s livelihood at risk.

OP has done the right thing by giving her manager the photos. I’ve only ever worked for large businesses, so if I’d seen similar I’d roll my eyes safe in the knowledge colleague’s actions didn’t affect me one bit. In a small business where you can see the direct impact, and potential harm that can happen to you, your colleagues and the business owner because of one person’s dishonesty- it’s much more personal.

It would be a good idea for your boss to look into getting some advice from a HR consultancy or employment solicitor- any action she takes must be followed to the letter.

MaisyPops · 27/05/2018 22:55

She came into work, said ‘I’ve been signed off for 2 weeks as i have hyperemesis’ then gave the sicknote to our boss, who was standing next to me.
And then magically ended up having the same week off work as her friends and the solution to all her medical issues was sunning herself and volleyball.

People who take the piss make life harder for everyone elsen

Sparklyshoes16 · 27/05/2018 22:56

OP you definitely did the right thing!! Your colleague is taking the Mick! I hope things pick up at your work and it doesn't go under.

overduemamma · 27/05/2018 22:58

I suffered with hyperenesis, it was awful and some days left me bed bound. There is no way I would or could of gone on holiday. Yes tell your boss especially if you are going to lose your job x

CoughLaughFart · 27/05/2018 23:02

What does that even mean? She has a sick note - what further proof will she or should she produce?

People who pretend they are virtually immobile but then go on holiday have sicknotes. Sicknotes can be questioned.

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