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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

To think parents really should put some clothing on kids in public?

172 replies

somesetmeadow · 20/05/2018 08:47

At the beach, water fountains in parks and so on, there’s always at least one parent who lets their children charge around without a stitch on.

I just find it really inappropriate. Prepared for a flaming but I do!

OP posts:
DragonMummy1418 · 20/05/2018 11:45

"Of course naked toddlers aren't offensive and in an ideal world it wouldn't matter but what if that guy with the iPhone who seems to be playing a game is actually taking photos of your children in the nude to wank over later?"

He could also be aking a photo of your fully dressed child to walk over later.

So lock up your sons and daughters. Never allow them out of your sight. ever.

Yeah cos that's the same thing.
Why don't we all wander around naked then? 🤷‍♀️

00100001 · 20/05/2018 11:52

Yaou re thinking there are paedophiles everywhere ready to take snapshots of your kidSure.

But the reality just isn't so. The paedophiles you need to worry about are your family. Your friends. The family friends. Any person who can develop a relationship of trust with your child.

The "pervert on the corner" will get their jollies from kids naked or otherwise.

Should I not wear certain clothes in case someone is getting their rocks off looking at me? Should I not be allowed on a nudist beach just because one person might get a little aroused???

Dietcokebreak1 · 20/05/2018 11:53

I was talking about this with my mum yesterday. Kids were always naked when I was young. She said because you didn't really get swim / waterproof nappies. I was always naked on the beach so was my brother and there are millions of pictures of us 3 and under naked. It's not a big deal, we're babies.

I don't really see an issue with it, if you think children's nakedness is offensive then I think you have a problem. Girls have literally nothing and boys just a little pee stick, it's not the same as adult genitals.

Perves will perv swimming costume or not. Having your knickers off does not confuse the issue that you don't let people touch you.

crispysausagerolls · 20/05/2018 12:03

Obviously it's personal preference where people draw the line - i can see why in your own garden or sometimes the beach it might make sense for a toddler to be naked. I don't think it's acceptable in the park or supermarket etc or swimming pool. BUT I find it weird actually OP that you equate the innocent private parts of children to adult genitals! For goodness sake they are hardly offensive, and it's not something that would cross my mind to be "offended by". And I agree with a previous poster who said you can't go through life expecting nothing to "offend" you and have the attitude of "why should I have to look" - for what it's worth I find grown men with their tops off walking around on the street much more offensive than a naked baby splashing about on the beach.

Tors33 · 20/05/2018 12:07

I agree its totally inappropriate we need to teach our children about privates to be kept private letting them run round naked in a public place is not teaching them

Mousefunky · 20/05/2018 12:09

Agreed. There’s a big water fountain in a city centre close to me and the parents often let their DC just roam around in it naked or sometimes will put them in swimming costumes... it’s a water feature in a city centre, not the beach! Irks me.

cardibach · 20/05/2018 12:14

My DD never wanted to be naked, so she always wore something. I’m confused about this idea that wearing a swimming costume/pants will stop sand in crevasses. It really won’t.

HellenaHandbasket · 20/05/2018 12:16

Dunno really. My older kids are 6 and nearly 8. They will both strip on the beach for the purpose for changing, but are past the age of running around naked. I'm trying to think when they stopped, probably in the last year or so? They would still swim in their pants quite happily, and were certainly still naked on the beach etc at times at sort of 5ish.

DragonMummy1418 · 20/05/2018 12:45

001 - you of course should wear what you want but if you were going to a nudist beach then you as an adult have the ability to make that informed decision knowing that people may look at you in a certain way, if a man looked at you and got aroused then that would be ok but for anyone to look at a naked child and to get aroused is obviously not ok.

It's not a case of protect against one or the other, I take precautions against abusive relatives / friends at the same time as protecting my child in public from strangers.
There ARE paedophiles out there taking photos and I wouldn't want anyone to have a naked photo of my child. I just wouldn't take the risk.

wtf2018 · 20/05/2018 12:53

You don't always have clothing free to get wet I've discovered.

I have let DS run around naked in water fountains

To keep his clothes dry when we've come across one we didn't know about on a hot day

Now he's older I do tend to say keep your pants on and get them wet but couldn't do that before

Bambamber · 20/05/2018 12:58

I don't think kids should play starkers in public places. If they're playing having fun they're hardly going to find an appropriate place to go for a wee or a poo.

Otherwise I don't have a problem with nakedness. I give my DD as much nappy free time as possible at home when it's just us and I keep her in the shade. I wouldn't really like to use suncream on genitals, and let's face it, No one wants burnt genitals

GreenTulips · 20/05/2018 13:57

You don't always have clothing free to get wet

Leave their pants on to get wet then swap for shorts or dress they had in before

It's not rocket science

Chocolatecoffeeaddict · 20/05/2018 14:15

No chance on earth would I let my children run round naked in public. Inappropriate.

HappyLollipop · 20/05/2018 14:22

I think as long as their privates are covered they should be fine but I am wary of pedophiles as I had to call the police on a man who was hiding behind a bush watching topless boys playing when I was a teenager so I know perverts are out there.

Chocolatecoffeeaddict · 20/05/2018 14:27

And in reply to someone upthread who compared it to men looking at her in certain clothes, that is wrong. Adults can wear whatever they like, but we as parents have a duty to protect our children.
We teach children that their bodied are their own and privates are private.

SadieHH · 20/05/2018 15:22

My 6 yo takes her clothes off as soon as she gets home, rain or shine. She goes out in the garden naked but I would insist on pants at a public paddling pool or whatever. We do use the underpants rule thing so it's more reinforce that than anything else. But at home I'm not bothered.

Zbag · 20/05/2018 15:26

Im with you OP. I feel uncomfortable when i see naked children in public and never allow my children to be out naked.

Sparklingbrook · 20/05/2018 15:35

I would not have let my two run around naked in public. The underpant rule and all that. Plus they never asked.

I don't much care if other people do, it's up to them and it doesn't offend me.

Frogscotch7 · 20/05/2018 15:47

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Bbbbbbbb2017 · 20/05/2018 16:28

It's a weird UK thing to be so pervert over the top. Really noticed it when on a holiday in mainland Europe

00100001 · 20/05/2018 16:47

"There ARE paedophiles out there taking photos and I wouldn't want anyone to have a naked photo of my child. I just wouldn't take the risk."

Yes... And there are paedophiles taking photos of fully clothed children. If a child is in a public place they stand just as much chance of being photographed by a paedophile.

The amount of clothes has fucking all to do with it. No parent allowing their children to run free is putting their child at more risk than the paranoid parents who cover them up.

toomuchtooold · 20/05/2018 16:48

I don't get all this stuff about how you have to teach them to have clothes on by making them always wear clothes. My kids, just turned 6, are perfectly capable of understanding when customs like this are explained to them and in any case they're starting to be a bit self-conscious about nudity so they would be very unlikely to forget.

VioletCharlotte · 20/05/2018 16:55

I really wish we lived in a world where it was totally fine for young children to run around naked on the beach or at an outside pool. However sadly there are so many pervs around, it does make me uncomfortable as you just don't know who's watching them. I think it's best to pop a swim suits on them. Or even pants if it's a spontaneous beach trip. Did this a many a time when my DC were little, they just go home in the car commando.

LartenCrepsley · 20/05/2018 16:59

What about sunscreen? I wouldn’t let my two strip off (aged 5 and 3) because I’d be worried about them burning. They’re both very fair and pale (like me) and we all burn quickly. My younger DC is ginger and her skin is so pale she’s practically transparent! I’m not even keen on short sleeves for her, in case I miss a bit with the Factor 50! So how do you maintain sun safety with a naked child? Possibly I’m being a bit hysterical about it, but rubbing suncream on a child’s genitals seems weird, and could be easily avoided by wearing some clothing.

00100001 · 20/05/2018 17:03

"However sadly there are so many pervs around"

How many paedophiles do you think are around?