To wonder why nobody told me about post pregnancy body

[Muse84]

Maybe I was just naive

I'm talking about the whole body changes here (down below... Let's not even go there!)

Pre pregnancy, I honestly thought that the extent of my worries would be a saggy belly (fixable with diet and exercise) and possibly saggy boobs (manageable with bra)

I'm lucky that I don't have a saggy belly and no stretch marks. Thank you universe.

But my god, my hips are wider, my ribcage is wider. My boobs currently stick out either side on my sides, if facing mirror.

Basically, I look like a frump

Why did nobody tell me about the general width expansion????!!!

I know this is superficial, but I'm so sad and tired of feeling like a big wide frump. Clothes don't sit on my like they used to (All I see is boob and hip. My grandmother, basically) and I genuinely don't feel as if I recognise my old self anymore

It's a little hard to take with crap post pregnancy hair and massive dark circles.

I'm just a bit sad. Sigh

Moan over. Sorry! I know it's a minor worry in the grand scheme of things

The rib cage thing took me completely by surprise. I'd never heard anyone mention it. I had some gorgeous empire line evening dresses too. Sigh.

@mybabystilemysanity

Every mums group I’ve been to I’ve mentioned my piles (have little-to-no filter) and everyone is so relieved someone has mentioned that, that they start discussing the other “secrets” of having a baby, such as how tears are healing, what are these white things on my nipples, where had my ‘real’ self gone??

My stomach will forever have a bit of extra skin, stretch marks everywhere, undercarriage stretched and shredded.
The beauty of childbirth

@mybabystolemysanity managed to spell your name wrong as well!

My feet went from a 7 to a 9 and I lost my beautiful shape as they are now flatter and much wider.

Ribs spread, hips spread although my shoulders got smaller for some reason? I have a small but irritating section overhang like a flap of skin there and I went from a pre pregnancy 32D to a 36G on a size ten but have to buy stretch tops or wrap tops a size bigger.

I had a typical English rose completion/ blemish free face as well but have gained a cluster of freckles on my nose now and my hair has thinned a bit after the last baby (no3) but have masses of baby hair all around my hairline that is cowlicked so I look like a lion.

There's a lot they glossed over about pregnancy, child birth and post birth and over the years I've said the same as you. I've even phoned my mum before in moments of despair asking her why she never told me x, y, z would happen etc.

I think if people where much more honest about the shit bits we would reduce the teenage pregnancy numbers and people may be a bit more cautious before planning a family, I know I would have.

Nonstop Ha ha!

My filter went to the same place my placenta did! I have no shame talking about it to anyone who's in earshot. Felt terrible at that antenatal class. If the midwife could have kicked me under the table to shut me up, I'm pretty sure she would have.

It's tough, but you may feel things start looking better in a few months. I have a 1 year old DS and in the first few months I felt I looked like crap. Could hardly recognise my body. It was only from about 9 months pp I felt I was back to normal (bar the saggy boobs which are never going to be the same!)

Now a year on, I find myself considerably slimmer and smaller all over than I was before.

I've been fortunate in some ways and not so fortunate in others. I had a c-section so downstairs is intact with no pelvic floor issues. My hair, skin, feet, etc are roughly the same. My main issues are a couple of piles, weight gain and a ruined stomach. Three months post partum I'm still two stone overweight, my clothes don't fit and my stomach is saggy and covered in stretch marks. I'm reserving judgement until I lose the extra weight and the stretch marks fade, then we'll see what I'm left with. I am totally intending to save up for a tummy tuck if necessary because I can't spend the next 40 years with this awful flap of a belly on my front.

I'm feeling the same 9 months pp. All kinds of saggy skin I fear I'll never lose. Fat I can manage because I know I can burn it but my boobs will never go back and I'm really struggling with that. They really are disgusting to me, now I have to scoop them up into my bra

My weight gain wasn't much during pregnancy. About 12lbs. I got back into my size 12s a week after birth. I then went on the pill and I'm now a lot heavier.

I dread my weight now.

By the time my daughter was 1 I was feeling really confident about my new shape. By her second birthday I loved it even though I was a totally different shape and down stairs has never been the same! And now I'm 5 months pregnant with no.2 and feeling like a frump again

Yes!
3w pp and I'm hoping my body goes back to how it was before!
My stomach is slowly going down but the rest of me, ugh! I feel pretty crap tbh but oh well.

I’ve had two large babies in 4 years, and with each one I’ve put on and subsequently lost 4 stone. As I lost the final pounds after DC2, I realised my body has lost all its firmness (arse and face most badly affected). My shoulder area and upper body has increased in size, probably the rib cage thing as well as lifting babies/toddlers several times a day. My feet look wider and my joints and back feel terrible, probably again from all the weight gained and lost. I have on/off problems with piles.

On the plus side I’ve not had any incontinence, and I did lose all the baby weight fairly easily. I didn’t get stretch marks. But I do feel like I have aged 10 years in 4 years.

My feet never changed either.

Everything changed, my feet are a size bigger too. Stomach is still on the big side with the overhang, you cannot exercise excess skin away. I've always gained more after giving birth then during pregnancy, the cost of suddenly being able to eat without feeling sick and being emotionally drained.

My feet have gone up a size, and are flatter than before. My main gripes however are the ruined undercarriage after DS1 (foreceps, shoulder distocia, episiotomy and tearing), and the MASSIVE flap of belly after DS2 ELCS. I've lost 20kg over the past 6 months, am lighter than before i got preg with DS1 and its still flipping well there. I am going to have to have a tummy tuck. :(

3w pp is really fuck all!

My feet grew a size, had to chuck all my gorgeous shoes, highly pissed off.
Wider ribcage - check.
I grew little moles and skintags EVERYFUCKINGWHERE. I still have about 50% of them.
Undercarriage shot to shit.
Boobs point to my elbows.

DS is 6yo.

I have learned to live with my new body

I think one of the key things is not to put on too much weight during pregnancy - so no eating for two - I think that really makes a huge difference.

partpooper40 my birth experience was the same as your dc1. I had no idea - none - how awful birth could be.

Just to add, for me the major change was my boobs nearly diseappearing... but I guess I can live with that....

When DS1 was almost 1, I was in a lift with him plus another woman. She looked at him, then me and said, “my goodness! You’ll have your hands full!” Took me ages to realise that she thought I was pregnant again! A couple of months after that incident, we were having a bit of work done on our house. One of the builders asked how old DS was and after I told him said “and another one on the way!”

Nobody warned me about diastase recti and that I would look permanently pregnant for the next 10 years until a bloody amazing Pilates teacher took me in hand and started to sort my stomach out.

Nobody warned me that stretch marks (which appeared overnight at 36 weeks and made my stomach look like a dartboard) meant that 10 years on my stomach would still look all crepey and wrinkly.

Ribs. Sob. Mine flare out at the bottom now. I had teeny tiny ribs and so they had to give to make room. Means my waist is much bigger and it isn’t just the extra two stone. Feet half a size larger, and wider, when they were like flippers anyway. C-section shelf escaped me the the first time but is horrible after having had a second. As I get older and saggier it is turning into an overhang rather than a shelf. Boobs are much bigger and not just due to weight gain. Softer and lower too. Varicose veins. I may have an undamaged vagina but everything else is a disaster ! Minimal stretch marks but with everything else really who cares. Doesn’t help that my dd is 13 and has a younger, girls version of my pre-baby body. Sigh.

My feet didn't expand which was annoying because reaching adult sizes would have been a nice perk.
Breasts were quite resiliant to their 2 rounds of 5 cup growth/ shrinkage.
Periods lighter and less painful

But...

DS1 was a humungous bump. The type where strangers argue about your "imminent" due date at 6 months pregnant. The type where you gained 50% of your bodyweight in less than 5 months, and you remain looking like a normal size 8-10 from behind, and look like there's a swiss ball shoved up your jumper. That makes for a lot of wrinkly loose skin... combined with a CS overhang, trust me... planks are a cruel, cruel exercise!

DS2 was a messy forceps/ 3rd degree tear. Running has improved unless I sprint, but trampolines or skipping ropes must not be approached without personal protective accessories. Some other niggles around there too.

Slight diastasis recti. Normal range. Just enough weakness that I'm only ever a hearty meal away from a pregnancy rumour.

Not so long ago, in a mixed age group of friends, we had a no holds barred discussion about pregnancy and its aftermath. Some of us have younger kids, some have teenagers. Two novice adults in the group... one is now a mother despite our honesty!

Eight months pregnant here and reading with interest. Can I ask the posters who’ve had issues with leaking afterwards, did the pelvic floor squeezes they tell you to do help at all? Wondering if it’s worth it!

Oh the c section overhang, no one told me about it!!! I still get a fright every time I see it.