To ask what your quality of life is like compared to your parents'?

[Echobelly]

Do you think you have it better than your parents or not? And will your kids have it better than you?

We are fortunate to have a good quality of life, owning a good sized home without too massive a mortgage, money left after bills. But (though I expect no little violins whatsoever to play for us) at our age my parents in the same position could regularly go to the opera, my mum could buy designer clothes (I twitch at spending over £40 on anything), they could buy new cars (we've never owned a new one), could send my brother to private school (wouldn't want to pay for schools, though) and so on. I guess this is a lot to do with that they bought our family home for less than 1.3 times their household income... our one was over 8 times, although we were very privileged in having two properties to sell. But still a much bigger proportion of our income goes into mortgage than it did for either of our parents.

I do worry for our kids... unless something majorly and permanently gives with the housing market, it's going to be impossible to own somewhere. The best hope seems to be that a decent corporate-run rental market emerges and they buying a place is less of an issue. I hate debt and I'm almost inclined to advise them not to bother with degrees if their main impact on life is a 5 or even 6-figure debt to start your adult life... maybe it'll be better to work your way up after leaving school!

A baby boomer bashing thread. Original.

Why is the observation that houses are less affordable now than they were in the past necessarily bashing baby boomers? It is simply a fact.

Will you not ultimately inherit your parents’ hone, though?

I am “not so happy, yet much happier.”

Erm... no, that wasn't actually my intention, as you might notice if you read my post and noticed the lack of criticism of my parents' generation? I'm just interested in the degree of difference people have experienced as a continuum to our kids' generation.

As to whether we'll inherit our parents' homes (where that's an option), and our kids some benefit from that, well that begs another interesting point, as it can't be considered a given anymore either given potential care costs.

My DM lived in a council house until she died, didn't want to buy and didn't really have the money either. We have bought our house, mortgage now paid off, general lifestyle better as I have always worked. Children of wealthy parents seem to assume they will have that lifestyle too and children of poorer parents generally have nothing to lose...

Our lifestyle is actually better than both our parents was at the same age.

My kids are too young to say what their lifestyle will be like. A lot depends on their own choices.

I think my quality of life as a parent with young children is better than my parents was in the 80’s. They didn’t have much money when we were growing up but they saved, were frugal and we did camping hols etc.
By contrast, I got married later in life and had children later, dh and I are both professionals and had bought a house before having kids so our income is much bigger than theirs was, although due to high housing costs we don’t feel the benefit as much as we perhaps should.
I think their retirement is much more comfortable than ours will be as my dad has a final salary pension and their house was bought for peanuts so they haven’t had a mortgage for years.
I don’t begrudge this, it’s just the way it turned out and I like that I don’t have to worry about them in their old age.

Our quality of life is definitely better than our parents and if all goes according to plan, our son's quality of life will be better than ours.

Our parents worked very hard for very low pay for many decades, in fact, my father couldn't afford to retire and died on his way to work at the age of 69. Both sides owned their own homes, but both had initially lived in their parents' homes for their first few married years in order to save the deposit. My OH's parents both died relatively young in their 70's and didn't really enjoy their retirement due to lack of money and poor health.

What we both have is work/saving ethic, so we ensured we got ourselves good jobs, saved like mad before we got married and bought our first home, and enjoyed a good quality of life, though never wasting money. Neither of us went to Uni, so we studied alongside full time jobs to get qualifications for fairly decent careers. We're now comfortably off and are starting to reduce our working hours in the hope of retiring early( maybe 60) as we've managed to save and invest in pensions etc (neither of us had occupational pensions).

We've instilled the work/savings ethic in our son, and all signs are that he will get very good GCSEs, go on to get good A levels, and then hopefully get a good degree from a good Uni, which will enable him to get a good profession, which will facilitate a decent lifestyle for him too. If there's any money left from our retirement, he'll get that too, but he won't need it if he gets a good profession and good salary.

I think we're one of the few families where each generation will have a better standard of living, but then again, neither us nor our parents really benefitted from the "boomer years" of plenty, i.e. no gold plated pensions, no buy to let properties, no endowment payouts, average sized homes which we still live in, etc.

Much better off than my parents. My dad worked up to 80 hours a week and worked his way up through a major firm, my mum was a SAHM but later did some fairly low paid jobs to help put me and my brother through uni. We had a four bed semi that was average and always had a car in varying stages of repair. Had a couple of amazing holidays. We never went short of anything but got the feeling that there wasn't that much spare cash until my brother and I had left home and were supporting ourselves.

I did two degrees, got a good job and married someone who turned out to be a high earner. We have a lovely house that is worth 4 times that of my parents, a buy to let, savings, pensions and no debt bar the mortgage.

Even though the hours my husband and my dad worked are comparable, my husband earns way more than my dad did as he is in a skilled profession. Knowing how hard my dad worked, it seems unfair.

Mine is worse than my parents. And my children's (the older ones) is worse than mine. Dd is doing a law degree and is only interested in money so out of all the children, she's the one that's more likely to have a better quality of life compared to her siblings.

My parents bought their house for a pittance yes but they couldn't have afforded it otherwise. We are much better off annual foreign holidays, coffee and lunch out, several U.K. Holidays. My parents were lucky to afford one weeks uk holiday a year. I think as a nation we are better off than our parents but mostly because they scrimped and saved to help us get there. They have a good life now though that we are gone.

I'm worse off. My parents could send us to private school, we had nice holidays, ate out a lot, had a cleaner and an ironing lady etc... I feel lucky I own my own home but can't afford all those extra luxuries.

Better than my parents but not as well as dh's parents. Ill health decimated my family and it gets in the way of buying your status.

I think our quality of life is better but we aren’t paying school fees and they were.

I’m much better off than my parents were at my age. Mostly due to taking the hit for childcare when the DC were small and keeping going with a FT job. This has led to career progression, which means I’m now earning £100k (DH earns about £70k).

When I look at the life my DC have, I often end up with a severe case of childhood envy. My upbringing was nothing like theirs. Growing up in the North during the Thatcher years wasn’t much fun.

I don’t know whether they will be able to afford the sort of lifestyle we have when they are our age. They might - but only because of the head start we will have given them (e.g. they both already have pensions which we pay into each month).

Mine is worse than my parents. They both own their own house each and comfortably well off while I'm renting and can't afford anything apart from rent, bills and food.

But, I'm happy in a long term relationship with the man I love and they are both alone and still arguing with each other 10 years after divorcing.

I'd like to say I'm currently better off than them.

At my age, my parents had two children and a home that would now go for over £1m. I’m renting, hoping to start a family this year because we haven’t been able to afford it till now, but utterly happy. Everything I have is partly because of how I grew up and the resources I had access to, so to an extent I’m still benefiting from it. On the other hand we’re doing far better than my ILs now, let alone 35 years ago. No idea what life future kid will have, but even if we don’t have much materially I’m going to raise ambitions children. Their definition of success might look different to mine, but I’ll make sure they’re equipped to meet it.

Just noticed I've completely contradicted myself in the first and last sentences

Financially I'm worse off but I think I'm happier is what I meant to say.

Neither my parents or DH and I are baby boomers (them too old, us too young).

They didn't go to Uni, but DF did go to Grammar school, and therefore got a good white collar job, and made a very comfortable living. DM didn't work once she had children. They live in a large detached house in the SE with big grounds/tennis courts etc. DF worked locally 9-5, until retiring in his late 50s with a final salary pension. They sent DB and I to private school. Life seemed relatively stress free for them. They are still very wealthy to this day.

DH and I did go to uni (old enough to be fee free). We both work and have a modest suburban semi with a postage stamp garden. We both have long days commuting to London and just about manage to send our DC to private school. Money is tight, though. We're very frazzled and stressed and I think our quality of life is poor. We have low pension forecasts, and will be working til likely 70 plus. Our lives are very stressful between demanding jobs, long commutes, caring for the children, and latterly, caring for our elderly parents.

So yes, I think our quality of life is far worse than our parents. Equally, I suspect our children's quality of life will be worse than ours.

That said, my parents are very generous, and have helped us in many ways - financially, with childcare, with support in general. Their good fortune has definitely benefited my DB and I and all their grandchildren too. The only thing that I feel sad about is that the necessity to work stops me spending more time with them and caring for them as they approach the end of their lives.

We are better off than our parents. My parents had a house but rates were higher, no benefit top ups, no subsidised childcare. Our needs were covered but we didn't have lots of clothes, we never ate out & we didn't get any toys or extras unless it was Xmas or birthday. Our books were from the library to save money & we went camping holidays.

We have spare cash, we don't have to budget for every penny, we can go on holiday abroad every year, we eat out or get take away atleast once a week. We don't have a new car but we can afford a newish car. Our kids get clothes because I like them, they can chuck £5 toy in the shopping trolley without much thought. We have hundreds of pounds of kids book.

Rubbish, totally rubbish.

When I was in my twenties I was accused of remembering it all wrong, but we honestly were hardly home, as we'd be at one GP or another, or down the pub / social club, being baby sat by younger family members.

When we had children, we were afforded none of the freedoms that either of my parents had. I swear that's what led to the break up as we literally never got to go out unless DC were there. I think it's the guaranteed death of any relationship if you never really get to have time together. I'm not talking about going crazy but it really is the little things. Although I remember my Mum getting in some right states.

But they had a super life as parents, they had freedom. When it came to acting saying like their siblings do, who have the GC over frequently, it's ultimately their loss.

I recall there was a gig we wanted to go to, tickets were hot, as we never went out we didn't think we'd have trouble finding childcare. The ironic thing is until recently I had siblings who were still at school, so it wasn't like they were childless and letting their hair down.

It's the baby boomer rhetoric. I'm nearly 40 but bla bla snowflakes expecting the world. No bla bla your child wanting just one night off.

I don’t know needing, some people just can’t access help if it’s non existent!

I would say different rather than better.

My parents had a huge detached house in a posh part of London. We live in an over extended 30s semi in an average part.

My father was self employed and worked 7 days a week with very few holidays. Absolutely relentless. My mother was a SAHM.

DH and I have professional well paid jobs and 5 weeks holiday and weekends.

DH parents were refugees - literally came here with shirt on backs plus a small case. So we are definitely have a better quality of life than them. (For a start our parents were not murdered by Nazis and we can stand in the middle of the street and shout whatever we want with no fear).

Looking at some of these posts makes me sad, the ones where people feel that their children will be worse off than themselves. Surely what most people want is just for their children to have a better quality of life?
Having said that I suppose it’s all relative. Dh and I have less money than his parents did but they did very well for themselves so I would still regard us as having done ok. Also they sacrificed quite a lot in terms of family time when dh and his siblings were growing up so I suppose it’s all swings and roundabouts...