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AIBU?

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Original poster

To wonder why people only do their own washing?

563 replies

sweeneytoddsrazor · 14/05/2018 01:03

Just that really.

I see so many posts where people say DP's or any child over the age of about 12 do their own washing. Surely it's easier to just empty the laundry basket and do one wash of everyones washing rather than have 4 people do 4 washes with not much in it.

OP posts:
longestlurkerever · 14/05/2018 08:06

Yes my washing machine has a quick wash too but I've only ever used it for washing the tablecloth or something. I always use the long cycles for normal laundry. That's why I asked if that was weird as I don't want to waste energy but I can't say I've noticed things feeling excessively clean.

@He11y- what's your system for returning laundry to the appropriate place then? My "system" would begin with individual piles, then sorting into the appropriate drawer when I get upstairs. Dd2 (2yo) tends to do the sorting and some of the carrying now, slave driver that I am "I do it Mummy BY MY OWN". Dd1 seems to have lost some of this enthusiasm.

BenjaminaBlue · 14/05/2018 08:08

I do my own washing and DP does his. He's not allowed to do mine as puts lights in with coloured stuff, shrinks everything, tumblr dries my delicates on high heat for hours at a time etc. It would be expensive to let DP do my washing!

I don't do his because if I did he would stop doing washing altogether as he's getting it done for him - lazy sod!

60sname · 14/05/2018 08:11

I won't go through the logistics again but just to say that DH and I do both laundry and meals separately (though we share toddler DS' stuff) and we are as boringly normal (and happily married) as they come.

LoniceraJaponica · 14/05/2018 08:13

@He11y DD has anxiety, depression, allergies and A levels in 3 weeks, and is struggling to find motivation to do anything. I am not going to put any more pressure on her just now. The house dust mite allergy was only confirmed a week ago, so I blitzed her room and wet dusted everywhere last week. She tidied it at the weekend, but I am just doing everything to support her over the next 6 weeks as there is a lot at stake.

He11y · 14/05/2018 08:13

@longestlurkerever Our children do their own now but, when they were small, we washed, dried and ironed, if necessary, it all together and then made piles on the table. Up to a certain age we returned it to their rooms but at some point they took it over - I can’t remember the individual ages - always when they wanted to, as everything is easier when you have willing participants! lol

Gwenhwyfar · 14/05/2018 08:13

"I don’t have to “go and get everyone’s washing” because it is all in the same place."

But you have to sort it back per person afterwards.

He11y · 14/05/2018 08:17

@LoniceraJaponica I would do all I could to help in your situation too. Hope her exams go well. Flowers

Gwenhwyfar · 14/05/2018 08:17

"To me it's a personal task, like brushing teeth. My dirty laundry isn't for anyone else to deal with."

This.

Backingvocals · 14/05/2018 08:17

I have no view on any of this except that this made me laugh:

Each to their own but please don't call my laundry habits a crock of crap

Identity politics meets liberalism meets Mumsnet washing machine chat Grin

Gwenhwyfar · 14/05/2018 08:18

"I was going to argue that point, given that I cooked for myself from the age of 12. "

So did I because I became vegetarian and the others didn't. My df got home later so wouldn't have been able to eat with us anyway and my dm was on a constant diet.

LoniceraJaponica · 14/05/2018 08:19

Thank you He11y. So do I.

gabsdot · 14/05/2018 08:21

My children have their own laundry baskets in their rooms and they do their own laundry. I see it as part of teaching them a life skill.

IfNot · 14/05/2018 08:23

I must be really sweaty because it doesn't take me ages to accumulate a full load of just my own washing. I do mine and ds's but he has his own basket and I usually do them separately (so his one day mine, his the next, towels a different day) but this morning he informed me had had no pants (major drama) and I said that from now on he can monitor his own pant supply and put his own wash on.
Dp is here so much he has his own laundry bag but I'm not delving around in there! If he wants to wash stuff in my machine he's welcome to.
It's not the putting the machine on that's a hassle, it's the hanging, folding sorting and putting away. Ds has been responsible for putting his own stuff away for years, so that when he asks me where his blue top is I can say "wherever you put it".
I do exist, honest.

IfNot · 14/05/2018 08:23

We do eat together though.

Sevendown · 14/05/2018 08:24

So it seems lots of people’s houses have only one laundry basket?

I’m surprised at that. I assumed everyone had one for every bedroom/ person.

I’d rather we did ours separately as that would mean they wouldn’t need sorted when they come out but dp does all the laundry so it’s his call.

I’d never do another adults laundry.
Of course you would always wait until there was a full loads worth!

AdoraBell · 14/05/2018 08:24

I stopped doing the DC’s washing after one asked me - how long does it take to wash one skirt one Monday morning.

This was because she had taken her freshly laundered and ironed school skirt from the wardrobe while playing with friends on the Sunday afternoon and left it screwed up in the linen basket.

Not everyone here does only their own though. DC were pooling their’s, one does the lights, other does the darks, and I did mine and DH’s, the towels etc. This has now changed as they dropped the attitude.

YoYotheclown · 14/05/2018 08:24

I’ve literally never come across a family who separated their washing especially for small children Confused. You’re all one family under one roof. I seriously don’t get it. Yes teach them how laundry should be done and even now and again ask them to put a load on. But they’re kids fgs. They have a lifetime of adulthood ahead of them. Give them a break.

Allthebestnamesareused · 14/05/2018 08:25

We do a family wash but everyone sorts their own darks and lights to bring down. And everyone (inc 3 teenage boys) know how to use the washing machine and hang things out so anyone can do it when asked to and do so without there being an issue ie. it is not Mum's job!

Shednik · 14/05/2018 08:27

We each have a laundry basket in our own room. It gets full very quickly.

Steeley113 · 14/05/2018 08:28

I have a ‘darks, lights’ wash basket and do a family wash. They all put their own washing in the basket (even the 2 year old with prompting) and me or DH do the laundry. I’ll carry on the same system with teens but they’ll all have a day to do washing themselves.

LorelaiVictoriaGilmore · 14/05/2018 08:29

Dh's clothes are very special and have to go round on a special wash with special laundry tablets at a particular time of the week... I cannot be doing with that level of specialness so he does his own laundry. The nanny does the kids' laundry because that's a whole load (or two, including bedding) by itself. Then I'm left to do my clothes and all other bedding. Seems sensible to me...

longestlurkerever · 14/05/2018 08:31

@He11y - I think our system is similar then - I just skip the ironing stage 😆

Sevendown · 14/05/2018 08:31

There are 5 of us.
12 loads pwk

LoniceraJaponica · 14/05/2018 08:35

"So it seems lots of people’s houses have only one laundry basket?

I’m surprised at that. I assumed everyone had one for every bedroom/ person."

DD's bedroom is too small for a laundry basket. She has a bed, bedside table, bookshelf, wardrobe, desk and chair. There is nowhere to put a laundry basket.

It might surprise you to know that not everyone can afford a house with large bedrooms for everyone Hmm

In households where everyone does their own who does communal items like teatowels, dishcloths, hand towels etc?

papaver · 14/05/2018 08:38

Same as ScoobyCan my hopefully soon to be ex on the very few occasions I was away and he did any laundry he picked through the laundry basket and only did his own and defn not a full load. Just another sign of what a selfish sod he is!