To wonder why people only do their own washing?

[sweeneytoddsrazor]

Just that really.

I see so many posts where people say DP's or any child over the age of about 12 do their own washing. Surely it's easier to just empty the laundry basket and do one wash of everyones washing rather than have 4 people do 4 washes with not much in it.

It's easy to bung all laundry in together for one person to do if you have the suburban average family.

In our household there are way too many sporty people, guests, friends staying despite us having 2 eco washing machines being used daily.

I do my dh's but he will bung mine in and hang up mine with his too.

Each of my teenage dd's and ds like doing their own as then they are in control of what needs doing when, it also has stopped us losing socks for some reason!!

As they are very sporty and have horses etc, have lots of their friends staying over there are a lot of changes of clothes and it works so well knowing that they know they will have their uniform or sports bag ready.

2 of my dc are at Uni so bring home their laundry and do it all themselves before going back.

We never have ""WHERE'S MY...!" screaming matches in our home as everybody is responsible for their own things but also will help each other out if they are doing a 'white' load for example, just to make sure the washing machine is full each time (which it always is).

Many women in particular think they should do the bulk of all household chores not realising that actually, being able to do one's own laundry is a necessary life skill, like being able to cook, clean and tidy up and should be taught as early as possible so the transition to adulthood and an independent life isn't such a shock.

My dc are shocked at how many kids their age go to uni without knowing any life skills and end up living in a squalid tip because they have never had to wash up or tidy up after themselves at home or do their own laundry before.

It's particularly bad amongst young male uni undergrads. Why is this?

Don't mums and dads think it's important to teach their sons how to look after and clean up after themselves before they leave home?

“If you only have your own washing then it wouldn't build up into a huge pile before having enough to wash”

. Don’t be too sure... (looks down at mountain by side of the bed)

This is why In our house DP tends to be in charge of laundry. He does most of it and happily pegs it out and brings it in. We’ve both worked all weekend so there’s a backlog at the moment. Which I will do as I’m off today and he’s not.

I do the washing because I want to - lots of things which need particular settings/ironing or not ironing are MINE and I a. don't want them wrecked and b. I want them clean when I want them.

Chores training, yes, but I do that in a way which doesn't make life more difficult and slow things down. Or, in the case of washing, mean more unneccesary loads. Chores for mine are making own beds, clearing table, keeping rooms clean, washing in laundry basket, etc.

The thing isn't so much the actual chore as the wifework, though. I am in charge of washing because it is better and more efficient for one person to do it and it means fewer loads etc. BUT. No way would I be picking up his stuff in this way if these things weren't shared. So, for example, he does the majority of cooking and shopping and that doesn't just mean 'he cooks' - it means that I don't have to give headspace to whether we need tinned tomatoes or if there is enough milk or whether all the lunch stuff for school is in place for a Sunday night because he does all that thinking and planning, just as I am there making sure essential stuff is all washed over the weekend, etc.

Sorry 'he' being DH there!

We don’t split laundry. I’m a stahm, I do DP’s laundry. He does all the ironing. We don’t break it up. Kids are tiny but help with collecting it and transferring it etc. You can share it out without being individualistic about it.

Lonicera - I may well go in older kids bedroom to find something I think they have borrowed but woukd never tidy Hoover pick up washing do washing who. At some point they have to learn to do this shit themselves. And if they got allergies they know where the Hoover lives

My friend and her partner (of 5ish years) don't wash each other's stuff. I've been at theirs before and he's said 'am I okay to take your stuff out so I can get mine washed' they also have VERY separate finances. If they do a weekly shop and friend wants some bath stuff or other non food items he will itemise the receipt and confirm exactly how much she owes him. It's not done in a financially abusive way, they just genuinely think this is normal.

There are 6 of us, no way am I having 6 laundry baskets around the place, I would hate that! We have one upstairs and one downstairs. We all do our share, the teens included, however the teens are encouraged to muck in and help with everyone's, not just their own. I would hate to everyone doing their own bits, would be extremely wasteful. We prefer to operate our family like a community, all helping each other and pitching in. Not every man for themselves.

I do mine and the kids. Husband does his own and his own ironing too. When the kids are old enough they will do theirs too, not at 12 but older teens for sure. I’m no-one’s skivvy.

I find it odd. Even when i shared a srudent house we would pop bits in for each other.

We have 8 laundry baskets! and still the floors are covered in bloody clothes.

We have 3 laundry baskets - whites, lights and darks. If we separated by person too we'd have to have 9 baskets!

We put the laundry in together but it's shared as to who puts it on. When it's done, we share the ironing as well. I might do it one day then DH the next load. We also put it away together. I'd never just do mine. Seems odd to me.

I don't sodding we'll make my kids do their own washing. I don't want the e tra bills for water, electricity and washing powder.

It's really bad for the environment and your bank account to put in a piddling load. Everyone's goes in together here in a 9kg washing machine WHEN THERE'S ENOUGH FOR A FULL LOAD utter madness to do separate loads

Oh and after reading a suggestion on here in the Housekeeping section, I now use colour catchers and put whites and darks in together. Saved me a shit load of wash loads so far in the two months I've been doing it!

So - a question to all those who have loads of laundry baskets and/or loads of washing every day - do you & your family wash everything every time you wear it?

There are five of us but I probably only do a load every two or three days. Clothes only get washed when they are dirty, as in have marks on or are whiffy at the pits. Jeans and trousers are probably worn a good few times before needing a wash. Towels can be aired and used again (we have our own). Probably the only things washed every time are underwear.

It always amazes me how lacking in imagination people are with anything that deviates slightly from what how they do things in their lives. So, washing separately means everybody doing small bits of washing or people queueing at the washing machine.

DC have washed their own clothes since 13. I fail to also see like another poster, why i should do it for them. At that age i was doing my mum and dads washing including younger siblings never mind my own.

No need for queues, we don't all wear clothes the same way or wash on the same day. No need for tiny bits of washing, surely you just wait until you've got a decent pile before washing? unless you have only 2 shirts and trousers. common sense also means if in the event any of us are short on washing and must wash at all costs, then simply combine it with someone elses.

I do 12 loads a week. Towels re used for a week. Bedding changed every 9/10 days.
Fresh underwear and t shirts daily. Trousers / fleeces outergarments worn 3 or 4 times.
A huge amount of dance and gym clothes-very sweaty - washed after every wear.
So in a week I will wash
ten bath towels
90 socks
25 t shirts or shirts
25 sports/dance kits.
Five sets of bedding.
eight pairs of trousers
35 underpants/knickers
14 tea towels.
Then stuff that gets washed less frequently,
Another load of blankets/throws/ cushion covers.

I do one load a day for myself and my 2 children plus all towels and bedding.

The reason why I don't do my other half's washing was because he came home from work 7 years ago when I was dealing with a 1 and 2 year old plus working 15 hours a week from home while they were in bed. Still up nightly with the 1 yo. He said "I'm sick of living in this shit pile". So I chose to tidy up instead of doing his washing. He still barely lifts a finger doing any household chores, bedtimes and childcare (but works about 60 hours a week). Turns out both children are autistic so now I know why everything seemed so much harder than the days my friends were describing and I wasn't coping.

We have separate laundry baskets. I wash my stuff, DH washes his stuff and we both do DS's and communal stuff as and when.

My DH has been doing his own laundry since he was 13 and wouldn't dream of asking me to do it. As soon as DS is old enough he'll be taught to do his own too.

One of the things that I found attractive about my DH was that he'd lived on his own and knew how to run a house and was a fully functioning adult which after 14 years with a man child who expected me to do all housework related tasks it was refreshing. I'm raising my son to be like his dad.

We both work full time but in fairness he didn't expect me to start doing his washing when I was on mat leave -although I did offer. I did all of DS's and communal stuff though.

My mind is boggling at you counting your socks Speakout. Is that 90 pairs or individual socks, just out of interest

@BadTasteFlump I wash anything worn next to the crotch or armpits every time - so underwear, vest tops, shirts, dresses, t-shirts etc. Anything else can be worn two or three times (jumpers, jeans, skirts, cardigans). Towels and bedding once a week (except the baby's which gets washed every day as do all her clothes - she's a puker!). Dishcloths and teatowels every two days.

Tbh I always thought I was a bit of an overwasher until I joined Mumsnet with its army of people who wash everything every time someone so much as touches it!

• BadTasteFlump Mon 14-May-18 12:05:24

So - a question to all those who have loads of laundry baskets and/or loads of washing every day - do you & your family wash everything every time you wear it? *

Now that ds is 13 and puberty has hit school shirts are washed every day. I can usually get away with wearing a top twice as I have a sedentary office job and rarely sweat. dd's dance wear is washed after every use.

Trousers/skirts are worn 2-3 times. Ds changes out of his uniform when he gets home from school but if he has rehearsal or dance class his clothes he's changed into are washed.

Trousers

I’m no-one’s skivvy.

Neither am I.

I’m glad I don’t live in a household where doing “stuff” for family counts as being a skivvy.

Well I am clearly a MN slattern then . Maybe it gets less as the DC get older - but if a top has been work and the armpits smell fresh and there are no marks, it goes back in the wardrobe - same with bottoms - not that I sniff them! Don't pants/knickers mean trousers aren't actually worn next to the crotch? Sorry to be grim, but unless somebody actually has an accident in their pants, don't trousers stay pretty clean?