To be a little annoyed about her priorities.

[CrazyHippo]

This is not a MIL bashing thread. I adore my MIL.

A while back me and DP took out a loan to help her pay off debt. She pays us monthly..often double the minimum payment to try and get it down quite quickly. The loan is for a considerable amount.

The last few months shes only managed the minimum payment, which is fine.

However, ive been informed this morning that shes bought a new dog that she collects at the weekend.

Am i right to be a bit peeved when she still owes so much? Or should i shut up while shes still making minimum payments? A dog isnt just the cost of buying, its the food, vets bills etc too.

So she is still relatively young, has had a shit few years with the rug pulled from under her feet in so many way. I can understand wanting a dog for company!

Poor MIL - I hope she enjoys her dog

Why didn't you sell the caravan instead of taking a loan out on the remainder?

If she is making the agreed payments, then she is kind of entitled to do what she wants with the rest of her money to be fair. So YABU to be annoyed about this.

I do get why you're a bit peeved though, I really do, and TBH I would feel the same as you.

I know this is of no help to you, but I would never ever lend money to ANYone, not even family. I would GIVE them money if I could afford it, (an amount I could comfortably afford to lose,) but I wouldn't lend any to anyone that I couldn't afford to lose.

Perhaps the family members getting the benefit of use of the caravan could pay something towards it's upkeep?

We tried to sell the caravan, but it proved pretty impossible mid-season..even at such a low price. We paid off the finance with the loan and then barclays (who the finance was with) sold it to the haven site. I guess this post has opened my eyes. I dont begrudge her a dog and hope it helps lift her spirits..i guess i just got a little miffed that it seemed like "struggling for cash" was actually "saving for a puppy". Id rather she had just been honest

If you banked with HSBC and then took out a loan and kept up with the repayments, they wouldn’t scrutinise your current account statements and then admonish you for going on holiday/buying a dog/whatever. Same thing, YABVU.

I'd just learn from this and not take out a loan for anyone else in the future! Your MIL is still paying off her debt to you - what she does with the rest of her money really isn't your business. So long as she's making her payments, she doesn't need to justify her spending to you.

The only thing I'd consider unfair was that she bought a dog rather than getting one from a rescue place. But dogs make such a difference to people's happiness, something to love and look after when you're on your own.

We had a baby while still paying off the considerable debt of our mortgage, no word yet on whether or not this has annoyed our mortgage lender.

I don't understand, if you paid off the loan on the caravan, how the finance company then were able to sell it.

What am I missing?

Given her disability I can so understand why she wants a dog. It will make her feel happier, her life must be absolute shit right now.

I don't understand, if you paid off the loan on the caravan, how the finance company then were able to sell it.

I don't understand that part either. Surely if the finance was paid off, it then belonged to MIL?

What did the finance company sell to haven?

Might be a better time now to try and sell Caravan. People will be starting to head away for weekend breaks and holidays. If you can’t get it sold get it let as many weeks as possible and use that income against the loan.