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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

Is it normal to feel really down and guilt after a night out?

60 replies

Letloose · 05/05/2018 12:51

Please go easy feeling really rubbish like Iv let my kids down. Had a rare night out last night at a friends house stayed up late had about 1.5 hours sleep due to worrying none stop about being a bad person. I must add I don’t drink very often at all but when I do it does seem to be a lot. Have 3 children that stayed at GPs so was happy and safe (would never drink looking after them) I don’t feel hungover just very tired. Does anyone else get like this or AIBU?

OP posts:
Original poster
Letloose · 05/05/2018 12:52

GUILTY sorry

OP posts:
TERFragetteCity · 05/05/2018 12:53

Why have you let your kids down? You are allowed a life!

Stop stressing and enjoy the - hopefully where you are - great weather.

IronMansIronButt · 05/05/2018 12:53

No, unless you have something to actually feel bad about, if you did something you shouldn't have while drunk or whatever.

Original poster
Letloose · 05/05/2018 12:55

No nothing at all. Just feel stupid for staying up so late and being so tired today. Does sound very silly now Iv wrote it down

OP posts:
happypoobum · 05/05/2018 12:56

Can you explain what you were worrying about or what you were feeling guilty about?

Do you suffer from anxiety generally?

donajimena · 05/05/2018 12:56

Did you get drunk? I used to and the anxiety the next day was awful. I never got out of control or made a fool of myself (well not in the last decade anyway) it turns out its called 'the fear' its perfectly normal but not pleasant. Its why I don't drink any more

lastqueenofscotland · 05/05/2018 12:57

I’ve really pulled a plug on night-out type drinking, now preferring a glass or two with the girls on a Sunday afternoon for this reason.
I jokingly referred to them as existential crisis hangovers but they scared me.

Original poster
Letloose · 05/05/2018 12:58

I do suffer from anxiety but usually under control. Just feel I could of been spending this lovely day doing something with them instead of feeling so drained.

OP posts:
Original poster
Letloose · 05/05/2018 13:00

Was drunk yes but not to the point I didn’t know what I was doing. I am a SAHM so not like I don’t see them anyway just hate to think Iv wasted a day out just for drinking l. Not worth it

OP posts:
Original poster
Letloose · 05/05/2018 13:01

It’s* not drunk still honestly I have fat thumbs 😩

OP posts:
DileenODoubts · 05/05/2018 13:02

I have anxiety too OP and this was really common when I drank more (usually to overcome social anxiety)
Alcohol’s a depressant and combined with a mind that catatrophises or overthinks The Fear can be really bad the next day.
Be nice to yourself and remember that all those thoughts are from the alcohol and do not reflect the truth

happypoobum · 05/05/2018 13:02

Yep - it's The Fear. I suffer with anxiety and if I drink too much I sometimes get The Fear the next day. It's like a massive downer where I think I am shit.

You should be fine by the morning OP Smile

CocoPuffsInGodMode · 05/05/2018 13:04

Alcohol is a depressant for some people. I have a couple of friends who no longer drink more than one, maximum two glasses of wine for this very reason. They would get the relaxed, having great fun effect while drinking but then the next day would feel horribly depressed and anxious. They decided it just wasn't worth it and now rarely drink at all.

Original poster
Letloose · 05/05/2018 13:04

Thank you dileen nice to know it’s not just me. I’ve never had this before like I said I don’t drink often at all. This is awful so will give it a miss next time

OP posts:
Bojangles33 · 05/05/2018 13:05

You've got the booze doom. You need carbs and an early night. It'll be ok. You're not a bad person xx

Original poster
Letloose · 05/05/2018 13:05

Thanks everyone made me feel loads better!

OP posts:
ohidoliketobe · 05/05/2018 13:06

Honestly as PPs have all said - it's The Fear and a common side effect of alcohol. Alcohol is a depressant, so that combined with usual little bit of a hangover grotty feeling, and tiredness from lack of sleep always leaves me feeling like absolute shite the morning after. Lots of fluids and a lazy day!

NeverLovedElvis · 05/05/2018 13:14

Do you take medication for your anxiety?
Since I went on medication I've found I can't drink as much alcohol, my hangovers are worse, and my anxiety is awful the day after a drunk evening- as if the alcohol has stopped the medication from working.

BoxsetsAndPopcorn · 05/05/2018 13:16

Can't their dad not take them out, surely that would make you feel better. If not, I'd put on my big girl pants and drag myself out. Lounging around feeling drained after a hangover is what students do, not parents.

aaarrrggghhhh · 05/05/2018 13:18

Post drinking anxiety. UGH. This too shall pass. x

Furano · 05/05/2018 13:18

Yes, this is THE FEAR and happens to lots of people after they drink. Alcohol is a depressive.

SaucyJack · 05/05/2018 13:19

Yep- it's The Fear. It's just a neurochemical reaction thingy.

You are NOT a bad person for having had a night out, and please don't let it stop you from living your life.

What did your DC do at their grandparents? I bet they had a great time being spoilt rotten.

LanguidLobster · 05/05/2018 13:20

It'll wear off shortly, don't worry :)

Original poster
Letloose · 05/05/2018 13:23

never yes I take medication. I did think it kind of felt like that. Just a rubbish feeling

boxsets Dad’s working today. They are actually with GPs still, just worrying about everything I will be fine. Sounds so stupid

OP posts:
DamsonOnThisDress · 05/05/2018 13:23

For some people it is normal. I would get the next day guilts even when I was younger and had no kids.

Would stay in bed feeling very sorry myself and beating myself up even though I hadn't done anything (although sometimes I had Blush).

I just put it down to alcohol being a depressant and that's just how it affected me. And that's part of the reason I don't drink much now.

When I was younger the night out was worth the hangover and the guilts but now they are tamer and not a bit worth it. Grin

You've nothing to feel guilty about at all. Hope you had a good night before that.