Is it normal to feel really down and guilt after a night out?

[Letloose]

Please go easy feeling really rubbish like Iv let my kids down. Had a rare night out last night at a friends house stayed up late had about 1.5 hours sleep due to worrying none stop about being a bad person. I must add I don’t drink very often at all but when I do it does seem to be a lot. Have 3 children that stayed at GPs so was happy and safe (would never drink looking after them) I don’t feel hungover just very tired. Does anyone else get like this or AIBU?

Yes I get this too

A good night's sleep tonight and you'll feel fine again tomorrow

Saucy in between children me and DH have been out and drank and never ever felt like this before. Even a few months ago I was fine the day after. Just got this horrible feeling all of a sudden it’s awful! They are not even home yet so obviously having too much fun!! As long as they are happy I will be fine

I’ve always gotten a touch of The Fear after drinking, but over the last few years it’s been getting worse and worse. It actually puts me off drinking at all, tbh. Certainly, I try to avoid any more than a couple of glasses of wine (and not huge ones!) because it’s just not worth it the next day.

Ah, The Fear. That's good to know. It's a thing. I always called it The Guilts.

It's not silly at all. It is a very overwhelming and real feeling. I would be very low. Even for more than one day.

You need boxsets in bed with comfort food.

Well, probably water and vitamins but I always went with the unhealthy comforts to get me through.

Be kind to yourself today. You deserve it. Don't feel guilty about having "a day off". Laze about and relish feeling like shit - it's allowed!

Yes it's the Fear. Lasts 3 days with me now that I'm older.
I just don't overdo it any more - not worth it.

It's totally normal. I feel really depressed and down about myself the day after drinking and I don't even have kids to worry about. It gets worse for me with age.
You're allowed some time to enjoy yourself with friends. You'll feel better tomorrow!

Oh hell. Don't fret. This is what we call hangover anxiety.
Tomorrow you will be fine
I'm good at my job
I'm a nice person
A hangover day makes me feel like I'm the most worthless person ever. I relive embarrassing incidents. I question every move I've ever made
Best remedies
Tea
Biscuits
Midsomer Murders
Naps
CocaCola
Fishfinger sarnie
Spaghetti bolognese
Early bed

Wake up like it all never happened.

Damson I’m not usually one to feel sorry for myself think that’s why I also feel so silly!
Lazy day sounds so good to me.
Will be fine as soon as i see my beautiful kids faces. It is very overwhelming!

Thanks guys!! Glad I’m not alone

As a child I pretty much used to be the same. I would feel guilty for having good days. I don't think it's normal and would suggest counselling.

When I get this I tell myself that if I didn’t have a nice group of friends then I would have stayed in and got an early night and wouldn’t be feeling bad.... but then I would miss having friends! It normally cheers me up a bit!

You know that song "chandelier' by Sia - that bit where she sings "here comes the fear, here comes the fear"
That's what you've got. I've stopped drinking more than 2 glasses because it's so bad.

bonita to be fair didn’t know what any of the words said in that! Will be doing the same from now on

Don’t feel,guilty about having a night off from being a parent. Your children are safe with the gps, which I presume is grandparents and not guinea pigs (which could be a problem). We all need a. Real now or then.

It’s alcohol - I feel so bad these days after even one or two small ones that I’ve stopped drinking almost entirely.

You’re allowed a night out! You’re allowed to get a bit tipsy or have some time off. If you’re feeling down after a drink, even not much, then try your next night out as a dry one?

Or embrace it, sit on the sofa and eat chips :)

I jokingly referred to them as existential crisis hangovers but they scared me

That's what stopped me in the end.

petal 😂yeah with guinea pigs best make sure they are still ok!

Yarn yes well not worth this feeling. I don’t need to drink anyway was just a rare night at a friends. Maybe takeaway for me next time while everyone else gets pissed!

Yeah I didn’t drink for a couple of years being pregnant then having a baby who co slept.

When I finally had a night out I was so looking forward to it and then kind of horrified by how bad I felt the next day and just sort of thought ‘well, not sure I can be arsed with that.’ I wouldn’t describe myself as TT, I have had a drink a few times a year, I’m just not up for any more than one (and often not even that tbh.’

Such is middle age

It’s not unusual OP, and once in a blue moon after a fun and well deserved night it’s nothing to worry about either! Get an early night tonight and your kids will never know xx

Definitely The Fear. Mine usually manifests by me replaying all the conversations I had during the evening, convinced that I have offended someone or said something completely inappropriate.

Beer Fear is the worst, it's the reason I gave up drinking in the end!

Hanxiety! Or The Horrors. My best friend calls it The Guilts. But yeh, it’s a thing. Horrible feeling but it passes!

A good old fashioned Shame Spiral. I get them baaaaaaad! And then forget about it and do it all over again 😂 (actually only about 4 times per year these days but it used to be every weekend in my young, carefree, pre-baby days...)

Don't worry about it. Honestly, the feeling will pass. There is nothing wrong with going out every now and again and letting your hair down. You are a person as well as a mother and you deserve some down time!

Don’t feel bad OP. We’ve all done it! Make a big bowl of popcorn and suggest a fun ‘movie day’ on sofa with you when they get home. Later, when you are feeling a little less ‘not hung over’ get out for a walk with them and the fresh air will help you.

Alcohol can be a bitch for this OP, especially if you have anxiety. You've done nothing wrong and have nothing to feel guilty about!