to think that my boss should be ok with my antenatal appointments?

[NumberNina]

Keeping this as short as possible. Boss isn't happy with how many ante natal appointments I have booked in. I've had miscarriages in the past, had a loop procedure due to my smear test, and have been bleeding a fair bit during this pregnancy. Due to this I am being seen more often for monitoring by the hospital.

My boss has made it very clear that 'she didn't remember having so many appointments' and that it would be useful if I tried to book them on the same day (really difficult to try and do this). Is it normal to have so many appointments? And AIBU to think my boss is out of order to judge me for how many appointments I'm having?

It's hard when you're being made to feel bad for being out of the office but that's surely just part of it pregnancy (p.s. I work in a very big office that can cover me easily when I'm not in).

I am in the same position. Have had a lot of minor complications which has led to some weeks having 3 appointments a week. Hospital is far so these are never less than 3 hours away from work.

Work have been fine with me but I do feel guilty for being off so much. I know you are legally entitled to be off but I would speak to your midwife about combining some appointments- she has done this for some of mine.

I would also ask for the first appointment of the day so that you are minimising the amount of time you are sat in a waiting room. I have also rang and changed appointments that are not convenient.

Wish you well with the rest of your pregnancy.

Being pregnant doesn't give you the right to abuse the system - not saying the OP did btw, it's a general comment.

I got rid of an employee recently who thought being pregnant was protecting her from everything, and who became unprofessional and lazy - taking a full day off for a scan and so on. She did try to go the legal route, but one letter to her lawyers stating our reasons was enough to make them drop the case.
So yes, of course, we are protected, but we don't have a blank card to excuse anything.

I agree that taking an entire day off for a scan is a piss-take.

Then they made me redundant whilst on maternity leave.
it's unpleasant timing, but why would't they. You cannot be made redundant because you are pregnant, but your colleagues cannot be discriminated against because they are not, and given the boot whilst you are being kept because you are on maternity leave.

@ikeepaforkinmypurse the redundancy was basically because I had a small child and they didn't think it was going to work going back to that type of job. I can't go into too much detail but I know this to be true.

Can I just state that I wouldn't dream of taking a whole day off for a scan! I always make sure they are booked in before 10am (where possible). The only problem is that I work an hour away from my workplace and the hospital is 30 mins in the opposite direction so I need half a day for an appointment. There is no way around this but I always go back to work in the afternoon.

Definitely go to hr and get some advice. Your boss can't prevent you from going to appointments and has to give you a reasonable amount of time off to attend.
I'm dreading having to deal with bosses in my next pregnancy as due to complications in my last one I'm going to have at least 5 appointments every month me moving to at least 10 a month the closer I get to term and frankly I can't see any employer supporting that volume of appointments

you are allowed time off but they do not need to pay for full days legally the only have to pay you for the morning if its in the morning or in the afternoon only have to pay you for the time of the appointment they DO NOT LEGALLY have to pay you for the full day aka your appointment is 11am does not mean you get a fully paid day off they can expect you to come to work (if your start time is 8am leave and 10am to get to your appointment and come back to work after you do not get to simply say i have a appointment on said day you legally have to give to me so i am TAKING the full day off paid)

Definitely keep a record of anything she says (if she puts comments like 'so many appointments' in emails then so much the better).

Get a health assessment with Occupational Health and make sure HR are in the loop too.

I know sometimes absences can be a burden on other staff, but that's just the way it is and you have legal protections. Your boss is being unreasonable and downright unfair. Comparing pregnancies is beyond daft. Does she expect robotic work performances, too?! It's hard to believe people would moan to you when all you want to do is protect yourself and your baby. Doctors and midwives wouldn't be calling you in for these checks if they didn't feel they were needed.

If it continues, I'd be speaking to HR.

Agree with others on here, it's not your boss' place to comment and legally they have to allow you paid time off to attend appointments.
I had a lot of appointments with my pregnancy as I had GD and felt like I was burdening them so I know it can feel a bit rubbish having to ask for the time off all the time. YANBU at all. Definitely speak to HR

Ask your midwife and/or hospital to write your manager a letter explaining it's necessary and to avoid unnecessary stress in the workplace such as questioning all the time, unfortunately clinics revolve around the hospital and not your manager's wants and needs or minimal experience

Your boss is not you! She can't legally stop you. I used to work in Cardiff but lived in Bristol. If I had an appointment, then it meant most of the day off! They didn't moan about it and I didn't have to take holiday for it.

Yanbu and your boss is a dick. Also I didn't get any choice in when my appointments were apart from the routine GP practice midwife appointments, and even that was limited - certainly had no say in timing of scans, bloods, etc!

Ikeepafork wow! You sound like an unprofessional employer who acted illegally and because you got away with it think that justifies it! There may have been a reason for a day off for a scan. Did your employee book the day off or ended up taking the day off?

A - op doesn't have to arrange them to suit employer. Good if she does but she's not required to.

B - not all appointments are that easy to arrange in such a way. Remember lots of pregnant women are working now, if they ALL were given early morning/lunchtime/late afternoon appointments the medics couldn't fit them all in! Especially if specific equipment is needed. Some aren't a specific time but a clinic and depends on how busy the clinic is.

C - WHERE the appointments are can make timing tricky. I had some appointments near to work (which was a fair distance from home) but some I needed to go to the hospital for which because of distance/transport meant at least half a day out of work. These were less frequent but the most important appointments.

Kaytee - did you seek legal redress? That's appalling!

Oh and they have to give you time off for antenatal care too such as relaxation, antenatal classes, etc if recommended by your healthcare providers. My midwife recommended I go to pregnancy yoga and waterbirth classes (only went to the yoga) maybe yours could too

You sound like an unprofessional employer who acted illegally

You might wish I was, but again, being pregnant is not an excuse for being unprofessional or a protection against a valid redundancy. Being pregnant doesn't mean you have a secure job whatever the circumstances, you just cannot be discriminated against because of the pregnancy.

You can lose your job whilst being pregnant, or on maternity leave. You just can't lose it because of it.
I didn't "get away" with anything Graphista.

Sounds like more justification to me ikeep.

No pregnancy doesn't absolve an employee of responsibilities but neither should an employer take advantage of a vulnerable woman.

Legally pregnant women in the work place are anything but vulnerable in the UK! So many get away with everything because their employers doesn't dare say anything.

50,000 women a year lose their jobs for falling pregnant. Its not true that pregnant women aren't vulnerable.

Any comments about number of appointments I would just clearly say, "I am not going to risk this pregnancy by missing hospital appointments".

I can't see how she can possibly reply anything else to that.

If she says can they be scheduled on a certain day, then you can ask, but if they say no, then the answer is no.

If she says again 'I don't remember having so many appointments' then just say, things must have gone very smoothly for you.

It sounds like she thinks you are making them up!

a tad misleading.. that was based on a survey of 3,200 women scaled to the whole population, and the figures explained in the way that would fit the article.
It's nowhere as simple as losing your job for falling pregnant.

I had to speak firmly to the DH at my last school when she told a pregnant member of staff that she had to make her midwife appointments in her PPA time thus managing to violate two legal rights of the member of staff in one fell swoop!

Oh really?

news.sky.com/story/pregnancy-discrimination-advice-updated-as-more-women-seek-advice-11136610

www.ft.com/content/3b589b3a-14b6-11e8-9e9c-25c814761640

www.independent.co.uk/news/business/news/pregnancy-maternity-discrimination-women-workplace-new-guidance-issued-acas-advice-uk-a8065746.html

And that will be tip of the iceberg as not all victims will know to or feel confident enough to call acas or other agencies.

Tons on it here on mn too

www.mumsnet.com/search?q=Pregnancy+discrimination

It is a major issue for women in the workplace. Disingenuous to deny that.

What OP is going through is typical of the way bad employers treat pregnant women and encourage them to resign.
It could be called constructive dismissal.