To hope that all parents who put photos of their children on FB/Insta/Twitter end up getting sued . . .

[Harumphy]

. . . by their grown-up children for breach of privacy.

Children have absolutely no say or control over what is shared by their parents, or with whom it is shared.

My family member has posted, on her public Instagram feed, her son's full name, date of birth, and every waking moment. Now that information will be out there for anyone to consume. At best, this could erode the boy's sense of self-esteem, security, and privacy. At worst, the data can be used to commit identity fraud or give a stranger the information they need to socially engineer access to him.

And I don't care if you say that you get consent before you post anything, because children don't have full knowledge of the context of their decision. They are not cognisant of the whole range of risks.

I also don't care if you say your FB/Insta/Twitter is private. Social networking sites are porous. Facebook in particular is never private, and the data you share will never be expunged.

I think it's not your place, and it's not your right.

Its perfectly normal to like being private.
Not on mumsnet, it would seem.

Be as private as you wish, but who are you to dictate how others manage their social media?

It's so much easier and cheaper to share photos with family through FB and the rest, still the best way to do it.

And can we sue them when they post pictures of us without consent when they are older

I don't think you do, I'm just saying you don't know what the kids will think or say in the future.

MrsSnitch I wasn't suggesting those children were at any risk but personally I would never want my child's image to be used in this way so would never give them the opportunity to.

There is a difference between nude or embarrassing photos on instagram and normal family photographs on FB.

As for FB always being around... thats what they thought about MySpace.
I didnt come up with that, it was some super techy type on tv the other day.

Respect other people's privacy. Don't put pictures of other people's kids online but parents should make choices about their own kids in the same way the make choices about everything else.

I come across people regularly who say things like "yes I was a child/teenager in the (80s/90s etc) and had a great time and I'm glad i lived those embarrassing years before any of it was on social media."

I too am glad those embarrassing haircuts/fashions/antics happened before social media too!

Young people don't have much choice now because their parents have been uploading their embarrassing pics since they were babies. Everything from sitting on a potty/bath time/tantrum to dodgy haircuts/looking spotty with greasy hair and braces when they go through that gangly braces/growing into themselves phase.

While some won't care, others will be mortified!

I don't post mine on Facebook anymore because I have become more aware about this kind of stuff.

Those who are minimising the fact of people being able to easily access someone's name, address and date of birth online are pretty naive indeed!

Ikeepfor

Those parents might have very good reasons to not want their child filmed or photographed. People escaping abusive relationships, foster children in some circumstances, witness protection. They are not necessarily just being precious.

Your off your rocker! No kid is going to grow up feeling unloved due to their parents sharing photos on social media

ikee, Christmas play and sports day photos are a problem for some families. Social services advise not to publish photos of the children as someone may be looking for them. I have a family member who accidentally let a dad into school not knowing he was banned from approaching the children. When the mum arrived she said "Oh my God he's found us".
I used to wonder what was wrong with those parents (aren't they proud of their kids??) but those who don't sign the 'allow-photos' slip do it for a good reason I'm afraid.

I wasn't talking about the parents who need to be private. Not everything is about abusive relationship or the parents dangerous job. These parents tend to be a lot more subtle about their requests btw, if only because the last thing they want is to attract attention.

Surely it's someone's choice if they want they want their kids photos to be taken at Christmas plays/sports day?

Before social media the photos may have just ended up in someone's photo album tucked away. Now it's shared all over social media.

I'm don't mind my kids being in Christmas play photos etc but I also respect that other people may choose that their children aren't in pictures.,

Before social media the photos ended up in the local press and could be found by anyone. They can now even be found via internet, I know I found a batch of old photos of my parents at school online!

I'm going to be in trouble in the future then. My son is on facebook, twitter, instagram, my blog and youtube

Heck, our son starred in a television show that was broadcast when he was one year old. He featured as a foetus on a scan, before being shown as a baby in NICU. How terribly embarrassing for him in his later life.

I can see why it may be embarrassing/awkward if doing something as such. But if it's a picture of little Emily accepting her camp badge I don't think any harm is meant, nor do I expect Emily to be upset in 15 years time.

I was in the newspaper as a kid. It wasn't for anything embarrassing, so I'm not offended. I would never say my parents were irresponsible.

I think intention is very much about whether the child would be embarrassed or not.

But yes, unfortunately in this digital age nothing is private.

I know the likelihood of it happening to me are slim to none. I have extremely high privacy settings and don't post anything that is be concerned about should I get hacked.

I agree with you to an extent op, surprised at the mega defensive reactions you're getting. I think there's nothing wrong with the odd photo, family snap etc, it can be nice. However I'm friends on fb with a woman I used to work with who posts at least ten pics of her five year old daily. Him on his potty. Him in the bath. Him ill in bed. In hospital... I find it really weird and actually feel really sorry for him. I know so much about this kid and I don't really want to.

Yes, every photo people took of their children with other people's children in it ended up in the local newspaper pre digital 🤣

The logic then surely requires that our society must not display any pictures of any babies or children below age of 10 (or whatever), not in the papers, not in adverts, not on the telly. Nobody must ever be interviewed on the news or have their picture snapped by a local paper whilst pushing their baby in a pram or their toddler on a swing. And instructional books on biology or childcare must be illustrated with drawings only.

Surely there's a world of difference between oversharing to the pint of not respecting your child's dignity/privacy and simply being a proud parent celebrating or sharing a moment?

My two DCs feature on Facebook and Instagram from time to time. I keep my security settings tight on both, keep my followers/friends lists low and am cautious about what I share. I fail to see how I'm doing anything other than cataloguing their lives and 'big' moments to share with a small amount of friends and family.

"Yes, every photo people took of their children with other people's children in it ended up in the local newspaper pre digital"

No, but some did. And the OP is hoping all children will sue.

Flylite I have a friend who posts everything to do with their children on fb but I also get the #makingmemories #mummydaughterdanceagainstallodds #feelingblessed 🙄😬

for the record I am not on facebook and never put anything about family on twitter so no reason to be personally defensive

Yes OP, I totally agree with you.

We currently have an homeless epidemic, knife and gun crime in the rise, more teenagers in custody or on asbos than previous years, but it's 100% the picture of Sharon's toddler eating a yougut, or Dave's daughter doing ballet on Facebook that will tip the scales. sarcasm

You need to get yourself to the grip store. Stat.

There is also the huge contradiction in parents telling their children not to talk to strangers, not to tell strangers their names, or addresses etc, whilst simultaneously sharing every detail of their children's lives with the world.

Can't believe how many people are (deliberately?) missing the point.

It isn't about paedophiles or weird local stalkers working out where you live. It's about people having the right to privacy in their private lives.

When I was a child photos got taken, and maybe once or twice in your childhood you'd be in the local paper in a picture taken at a local event. Some people took pictures at school plays which were mostly never seen again. Your parents took pictures which were probably put in an album and possibly brought out to show family members at the time, or boyfriends years later. But in the main your life was private. Very few people would ever see a picture of you naked or at home - just a trusted select few, for a short time. There are no pictures of me as a child on the internet, apart from maybe a couple of whole class school photos. Those pictures in the local papers are long gone.

Today's children have no choice, for some, nothing about their lives is private, and every little thing is there for school bullies, future employers, boyfriends etc. to see. Just because their parents like to use their children to show off. Some of my friends put pictures of their children on there every day. And many people still have no privacy controls on their FB accounts.

I just don't see the need to thoughtlessly violate other people's privacy in this way - if you want to share pictures, you can do so privately via a shared google album or even a facebook account that is only open to your immediate family.