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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

Aibu to think my friend enjoys rubbing things in my face?

124 replies

Malibuandpineapple32 · 28/04/2018 11:08

Both been friends for 10 years.
Both work.
Im currently scrimping and saving to buy a car,second hand one ..so far only managed £500 but plodding on,hopefully get a decent run around under £2000.
Friend passed her test a few weeks ago and couldn’t wait to ring me telling me her dad had bought her a 5k car and put the insurance in his name so she only pays £30 a month..that’s great I’m pleased for her BUT then she says “awww don’t worry you will get a car one day,just keep saving your penny’s”
How much you got saved? I couldn’t live without my car now.

Then last night we went for food and I ordered a dessert and she goes “you will never get a car you” I say why and she reply’s “spending money on dessert”

OP posts:
YouTheCat · 28/04/2018 13:54

Is she 12?

AmericanEskimoDoge · 28/04/2018 14:01

There's no obligation to stay "friends" with someone who treats you so poorly.

Definitely time to phase out that relationship, unless you're the personality type to take a swipe back and put her in her place when she oversteps. (Still doesn't seem like a friendship, but different strokes for different folks...)

If you want to save the friendship without the "tit for tat" approach, maybe it's time to tell her outright how her comments are making you feel. It might feel awkward, but she's the one starting it. Honestly, though, she must know that she's being unkind, so pointing it out might not make a difference in the long term.

expatinscotland · 28/04/2018 14:03

Not a friend. Start cutting her a wide berth.

billybagpuss · 28/04/2018 14:03

So Dad's fronting her policy, which is illegal and the insurance company won't pay out as they will find out if she needs it.

Ignore her, if she offers other things to the friendship just brush it aside she probably thinks she's being funny, if she doesn't loose her.

JustaLittlePrick · 28/04/2018 14:04

Am I the only one whose mind was in a weirder place on reading the thread title?

Sweetpea55 · 28/04/2018 14:06

True friends dont treat you like that,Shes a nasty bitch,

Aeroflotgirl · 28/04/2018 14:07

Wow she us nasty. Think when you have bought your car, you have done so by yourself as an independent adult, not relying on mummy and daddy. I woukd distance myself, she was bring nasty and sneery towards you.

Bluntness100 · 28/04/2018 14:09

I would say she was showing off, and at your expense. I'd also guess it's not her car, it's his, in his name as the registered owner, but she's getting full use of it and is the named secondary driver.

Some folks are just like that, not very nice and they like to show off. You see it on here often. Things like "oh you're struggling with uour weight, what a shame, I've been seven stone all my life" or "gosh your husband treats you terribly, mine doesn't just treat me like a princess, he actually worships the ground I walk on. Poor you ". Or "your kids sound hard work, mine are so well behaved strangers actually comment on it in the street".

It's just something some folks do.

ChikiTIKI · 28/04/2018 14:15

It's only really a friendship when you're invested in the other person.

She isn't your friend if she isn't genuinely happy for you when something good happens for you and similarly if she isn't genuinely concerned if something bad happens to you.

Sounds like she doesn't want you to get a car and is enjoying the fact that you don't have one :(

SoaveSally · 28/04/2018 14:18

She's horrible! LTB!

JenBarber · 28/04/2018 14:20

She's not your friend.

Ditch her.

TheAntiBoop · 28/04/2018 14:20

You would have saved a hell of a lot more money if you hadn't wasted your time on dinner with her!

Does she have any redeeming qualities?

Fluffycloudland77 · 28/04/2018 14:29

Ditch her, life’s too short for this sort of bitchiness.

Also their committing fraud.

Rudi44 · 28/04/2018 14:33

I would tell her that things are so much special when you have had to work hard to save for them.
She doesn't sound like much of a friend.

IJustLostTheGame · 28/04/2018 14:37

Smug bitch.

GrannyGrissle · 28/04/2018 14:39

I would never be friends with someone who says dessert.

UrgentExitRequired · 28/04/2018 14:41

goodness me! She is not a good friend at all. You having a dessert has got nothing to do with you saving for the car. Whilst you were having the meal, it seems like she was waiting for an opportunity to rub this situation in your face. Get rid of her.

DevilsDoorbell · 28/04/2018 14:41

Ditch the bitch!

TryingToForgeAnewLife · 28/04/2018 14:43

OP - what are you going to do?

GnotherGnu · 28/04/2018 14:46

I'd be severely tempted to report her for insurance fraud.

Daftquestion1 · 28/04/2018 14:48

She's a frenemy. Give her the heave ho

BewareOfDragons · 28/04/2018 14:50

She's vile and not your friend.

How nice that she herself didn't have to save and spend her own money and has money in her bank account.

mimibunz · 28/04/2018 14:50

She really is mean-spirited. Are patios for men only, cause I reckon she belongs under one.

zzzzz · 28/04/2018 14:51

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

LardLizard · 28/04/2018 14:51

She sounds horrible

Best dropped
Or you could have some fun, saying you’ve got this or got that etc
As she’s obviously getting a thrill out of having (more)materially than you