To ask why the Brits hate apartment-living?

[PaulaLollie]

Hi all, I have been living in the UK for a few years, but I am originally from Europe and I have lived in multiple countries before moving to the UK.

I have never understood why the Brits seem to be so into living in a house vs. living in an apartment.

Where I come from, the wealthy live in huge, renovated, fancy apartments in nice historical buildings, right in the city centre. That is "the dream" for most, if you see what I mean.

In my home country, living in a house most of the times means living in the countryside/ suburbs, which is not what most people aspire to do, if they have the means to live in the city centre. The concept of having a family = living in a house does not really exist.

For example, I come from a comfortable family background, went to private school, and grew up in an apartment. Nearly all my childhood friends did the same. It never crossed my mind that growing up in an apartment was anything less than ideal.

Here in the UK (as widely shown here on Mumsnet) it sounds like the dream is living in a house, while living in an apartment is really not that great if you have an alternative.

Please, British mumsnetters, can you shed some light on this aspect of the British society? I genuinely just don't get it!

Thank you!

We live in a flat converted from an old hospital. It’s beautiful. Very quiet. Well insulated. Shared, very well maintained grounds and communual areas and it’s gated with 24 hour security. Apart from the ghosts it’s great!

I've lived in both. When I was younger and single I loved living in a lovely apartment in a nice area of a city but now I have a family and so we moved from the city to a beautiful little village. For Us, it was about space and lifestyle. We love it and we don't want to go back!

I’ve lived in both. Rarely do you find apartments in the Uk that are properly purpose built. They’re generally too small and badly soundproofed. In the US though my apartment was massive, came with a laundry room, balcony big enough for a table and 4 chairs plus a grill and you could have murdered something safe in the knowledge no one would’ve heard a thing. Plus the genius that is the garbage chute.

Because most apartments are how you describe, mainly.

We're actually not that pressed for space, contrary to the belief that the UK is much more built up than lots of other countries, so we don't need to cram into flats.

You are if you live in the south-east! The Campaign to Protect Rural England released new research showing that this part of the country is increasingly crowded. We certainly notice how crammed the roads are in our town, how housing developments of hundreds and often thousands of houses are springing up. Our county has been nominated as a growth area by some business syndicate and we are building houses to attract people in.

People in the north of England and Scotland have no idea. We benefit from being 75 mikes from London but a price is being extracted.

And yes, the snobbery about houses. In the new ones near us you can barely get a wheelbarrow between the detached ones and most of the terraces look narrower than an average sofa. The gardens are tiny and only at the back. Front gardens don’t really exist. Not much parking. I can’t see much to feel superior about tbh.

I grew up in a 3 bedroom house. The garden hardly got used as we were always out the front riding bikes with our friends. I used to love visiting friends who lived in flats. It was so much fun. I live in a two bedroom flat now with my daughter and we absolutely love it here. It's a proper little community here and I have a little garden outside that I share with all my neighbors. Thier children are the same age range as my daughter so She's always got friends come rain or shine. We get the paddling pool out and the BBQ in the summer and in the winter we go round for play dates. I do understand that some places aren't like that. But not all flats are the same.

I like having a house because we have a large garden the kids can run around in. I like my own front door and neighbours not too close. I always think of apartments as just a bit of a house whereas I like having a whole house and I would hate to share a garden.

I wonder if apartment living was more popular, that would help ease the housing crisis - i.e building upwards rather than outwards - but outside big cities, I think most people will always prefer houses.

I can't imagine anything worse than bringing my noisy bugger kids up in a flat. They'd destroy the neighbours...

I think people in the U.K. like a bit of space round them, I love having a garden and not being too close to neighbours. It's freedom.

Maisonettes work well, with a whole floor and access to your own section of the garden. Sometimes they are more space efficient for smaller ‘houses’.

Mainly because anything decent apartment wise is out of budget for most of us. Personally I love my washing drying outdoors too so no outdoor space is a no no for me

Mainly because anything decent apartment wise is out of budget for most of us

Surely that applies to houses too.

Where do you get the info that says we “hate” apartment living?

Of course anyone with any common sense will choose a house with garden and without neighbours above, bellow and either side.

I don’t think having a house as a preference means we “hate” the alternatives.

Wouldn't want to live in a flat. Or in a city! Nice size house, plenty of outside space- perfect in my opinion! Not stuck inside 4 walls with limited ability to keep pets and grow things. But fair enough some people like being in fume filled cities and don't like animals or enjoy gardening! Just like lots of people like shopping while I can't think of a worse way to spend a spare day!

@annoyed it must be lovely to be able to pick exactly which house in which town you want to live in. Sadly, as flat tend to be cheaper to buy and rent, and much government housing is flats, not everyone has that luxury. Not that difficult to understand is it?

Lived in flats for years and houses, for me it's a privacy thing, I feel my space is invaded more in flats.

I hate city/town life.....well urban life in general. Apartments are generally a city thing.

I like space, privacy and quiet

"Of course anyone with any common sense will choose a house with garden and without neighbours above, bellow and either side."

That is exactly what I mean! It is not that obvious thag "anyone with any common sense" would choose a house over a flat! Not in other countries at least.

I think it depends on the city and the people you know. I certainly know many people who 'aspire' to live in a beautiful city centre converted building. In the meantime, they live in more modest apartments close to the city centre, as opposed to houses further out. City centre living can be lovely, even with a family, if you live in a good area.

When I was younger I visited with a friend's aunt in a flat in the Barbican and it made me long to live there. Thirty years later if I had the money I'd still happily buy a flat in the Barbican. I love the place, I love the flats, I think the communal garden areas are beautiful, and I love where it is in the centre of everything.

N.b, I might be outside of the "norm" because I've been living in a very desirable village for about seven years and I'm now looking to do a home swap (I live in a housing association flat) to go back to living in London nearly thirty years after I left. I'm an urban person and I've had to acknowledge that to myself!

Also, the majority (not all) of flats have community washing lines. I think as long as you get on with your neighbors it's as private as a house. My neighbor never hears me and the only thing I hear from hers is the baby's walker on the floor but it's very faint and doesn't bother me. I think as long as your happy and healthy, does it really matter that much? Not trying to be rude but some of the comments on here are a bit snobby.

I lived in a gorgeous apartment in Salford Quays before I had my DC and I hated it. I suppose it’s what you’re used to but I just felt incredibly claustrophobic. I hated the fact that if I wanted to leave, I couldn’t simply walk out of the front door and be hit with fresh air. I hated the noise from the people above.

I’m not massively keen on having a garden either (too much upkeep and I’m lazy) but I feel less claustrophobic in a house.

I've lived in both. I prefer my house with its garden, if you can call it a garden (I am not particularly green fingered, so it is mostly just lawn).

We used to have a small two bedroom apartment on the Isle of Dogs in London. It was nice enough, but up five flights of stairs with no lift. That was OK until DD1 was born, and then it became both cramped, impractical and a nightmare to get in and out of. Hauling shopping, pram and baby in relays up those stairs soon made us hate it. I felt like a prisoner in my own home in her early days, although I did sort of grow used to it. We moved out when DD1 was a year old (she's almost 23 now) and we chose a house in the Essex commuter belt.

The house just had so many advantages, including ease of getting in and out with prams and shopping when the younger two DDs were born. At the time we bought it it was actually cheaper than our flat, which was a big bonus.

That is it from our perspective.