To say no to the 6th Harry Potter book...

[TabbyTigger]

DD is 5. She’s just finished the first five Harry Potter books and, obviously, now wants to move onto the 6th. However from what I and other DCs remember, this one has more mature themes (romance/more detailed deaths) and is generally more complex. AIBU to ask her to wait a year or so before reading it or should I let her try and see how she does?

The first three books are fine. They were actually written for young children
The first 3-4 films were marketed at children.

There are many, many tiny Potter fans.

Funnily enough, I found the third book and film the scariest out of all of them. I’ve never liked werewolves.

If you're talking about death as an inappropriate adult theme. I suspect the boat's already sailed on that one for the OP's child given her real life experiences.

All the more reason to be so very careful about what she reads on the subject.

All the more reason to be so very careful about what she reads on the subject

Surely a child’s own parent is the best qualified to know what subject matter is appropriate especially when on this thread we appear to be talking about engaged, proactive parents who are sharing a love of reading with their children.

Why is she asking for advice on that very point then?

“The first three books are fine. They were actually written for young children“

Not 5 year olds, though.

I was a very early reader, and I can assure you that reading Tolkien etc. "too young" doesn't spoil the books at all! What does interest me is how The Classics are often suggested as Safe Books for Advanced Readers. Black Beauty with the mistreatment of animals. Secret Garden which kicks off with a fairly graphic cholera epidemic. Anne of Green Gables, an orphan already on her third live-in servant job aged 11.

I would rather my children read about dreadful things in books where you have a chance to talk about it at a safe remove from reality. This includes Harry Potter. Then they have something to build on when there is a bombing, a school shooting, or a friend killed in a car crash. Dreadful things happen regardless of age. Books are safe places to explore them.

I wonder what JKR herself has said about an appropriate age to start reading these books? Has anyone already investigated for the thread?

Why is she asking for advice on that very point then?

Because she’s being proactive 😉. I kind of get it though. I think it can be difficult to gauge a situation when you’re in it. In all seriousness it’s so hard to find stuff for some advanced readers.

My parents went through it with me - I was reading Dennis Wheatley and classics at 8. I’m going through it with my DD. I don’t believe in banning books or saying “too young”. I approach by discussing with her that she might find some bits trickier to understand and it’s ok if she wants to try. We regularly talk about what she’s read

Conversely I had friends who hid books from their parents because their reading was censored - I think that’s far more dangerous.

I come back again to the particular age group we are discussing. If there is a suggestion that a 5 year old would hide reading material from the parent, that's a damining indictment of the parenting

I'm a primary teacher and was also an unusually early reader. Both of my children followed fairly average pathways into reading and were definitely still on Biff and Chip in Year 1.

They are both surrounded by books,read to and with and they both love reading.

I think it's wonderful that the OP's child is an avid early reader. I kind of resented the implication that the fact she is one is due to a house full of books and everyone loving reading?

I wonder what JKR herself has said about an appropriate age to start reading these books?

I think Jo is probably intelligent enough to realise that every child is different, so what is appropriate for one may not be for another.

Poblet I'm kind of with you on the fact that I don't think a love of reading necessarily comes from a house full of books. It's just the way you are. I'm an avid reader with hundreds of books, my children have grown up with books from an early age and they enjoy reading but they don't love it like I do, there are 20 other things they would rather do first. One dc was on books without words in reception, one was on the top table for reading. Every one is different and there's definitely some snide remarks on this thread, from both sides.
I haven't read HP and have no desire to, so I can't comment on suitability, but certainly as children get older I don't think they should be stopped from reading certain books. I remember reading my mums Catherine Cookson books at 10/11 and having to ask what a virgin was. My dc 13 reads lots of manga books age 16+ and if she doesn't understand something she'll happily come and ask me what it means. And I also agree with the pp who said you can reread books many, many times and still enjoy them just as much as the first time. I'm in my 40s and love reading my old YA books, especially Judy Blume. It takes me back to being a teen again.

"Conversely I had friends who hid books from their parents because their reading was censored - I think that’s far more dangerous."
I thought secretly reading Scruples or Riders was a bit of a rite of passage. I remember being disappointed that I didn't t have to in my house-it sounded much more fun!
But we are talking about a 5 year old here. 5. Not 8,10 or 13.

Kim my first proper introduction to sex was reading my mums Hollywood Wives at 12 , hidden in a corner of the dining room! I still love Jackie Collins now, trashy but so full of black humour!

I thought secretly reading Scruples or Riders was a bit of a rite of passage

See I don’t believe secretly reading anything is a rite of passage. But that just goes to show that different things work in different households. Neither is more valid!

I got a phone call home from school because I’d snuck Hannibal in as my reading book
I was in year 4, however old that is.

I guess that's why various authorities around the world advise parents that most of the films - which in my view are incredibly accurate representations of the visual images engendered by the books - are suitable for 12 year olds upwards, not 4 year olds. There's no legislating for idiots. Unfortunately, the parents' own desire for the child to enjoy something they themselves hold dear gets in the way of common sense.

"I thought secretly reading Scruples or Riders was a bit of a rite of passage

See I don’t believe secretly reading anything is a rite of passage. But that just goes to show that different things work in different households. Neither is more valid!"
And today's Mumsnet's Most Pompous Post Award With Passive Agressive Bar goes to........

YABU, anything unsuitable will go over her head. If she starts getting nightmares, then OK reassess the situation.

It's too late by the time they start getting nightmares!!!

@Kim throughout the post you’ve seemed to labour under the impression that your way was correct...I’m simply suggesting maybe you’re wrong.

This thread has been utterly hilarious

It's too late by the time they start getting nightmares!!!

Why can’t you accept that some children won’t?!

Nails - by the logic of most of the posters on here, watching the films won't matter, because little children cannot possibly comprehend adult themes!

DS has been watching the first three Potter films since he was 2. They are PG, not 12. He begged to watch the fourth one at 4, he watched 5,6,7 and 8 at 6. He wasn't bothered in the slightest. He's now seen them all many times and is starting the book of OOTP as he's read the first four many times too.

Children. Are. Different.