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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

To be annoyed about other dogs

221 replies

Anewhope · 26/04/2018 11:11

Every day we go on a walk to some nearby fields. My dog is a small spaniel and is obsessed with her ball. If another dog comes over she doesn't even glance at them, all she's bothered about is us and the ball.

Every day she gets mobbed by other, (usually bigger) dogs. It's not too bad if there's just one of them because she generally runs off and the owner can shout them back but recently there have been groups of 3 or 4 big dogs that come bounding over to us, so the owner isn't close enough to stop them. It happens every time, different owners and dogs.

My dog tries to get away, she isn't interested. But they end up all crowding around and jumping all over her. It's awful. She gets stressed and barks if there isn't any space for her to get away and I worry they might hurt her. I don't know how to stop it, I imagine it would be worse if my dog was on her lead cause she couldn't even get away.

Any advice? Would you say anything? Or do I just suck it up and let it go? Or change dog walk location? It's perfect for us other than that, she's a spaniel so needs that free, off lead time really.

OP posts:
QuiteLikely5 · 26/04/2018 11:12

Can you change the time of the walk?

Original poster
Anewhope · 26/04/2018 11:14

I go at different times every day to be honest. The time if day never seems to make a difference. Sometimes I've got my preschooler with me too which makes it even more stressful.

OP posts:
FranticallyPeaceful · 26/04/2018 11:15

So you’re mad that a dog comes near your dog

BumpowderSneezeonAndSnot · 26/04/2018 11:17

Keep her on lead if she can't cope with other dogs. Most owners assume a dog off lead is friendly and ok to be approached

Original poster
Anewhope · 26/04/2018 11:18

No not at all. I love dogs, my dog isn't bothered by them if it's just one giving her a quick sniff. I get annoyed when there are a few of them with one owner, all jumping all over her and the owners doing nothing.

OP posts:
Original poster
Anewhope · 26/04/2018 11:21

But my dog is friendly, that's my point. She's perfectly friendly and fine to be approached. She is in no way nasty or skittish, just not bothered about other dogs. She doesn't want to play with them, just me and the ball. .. If she was on a lead, the other dogs would still be jumping all over because they come bounding over from the other side if the field. It's not one individual dog that bothers me, its when there is 3 or 4 of them all crowding around her.

OP posts:
nellieellie · 26/04/2018 11:24

Owners should call their dogs off if yours is not enjoying their company. I wouldn’t worry about your dog getting hurt though. I know she doesn’t want to play, but dogs can play together looking like they’re killing each other and there’s no injuries. I think all you can do is put her on a lead when the other dogs come over, and then ask the owner to call their dogs off as yours is nervous, when in earshot. If it’s the same dogs the owner should get the message.

redtulip12 · 26/04/2018 11:24

I have a similar problem. My spaniel is ball obsessed and wants to stick with me rather than play with other dogs. He is also fearful of some dogs due to getting picked on a lot as a puppy (stopped when neutered). He is 7 now and a bit more confident so will growl and tell other dogs to go away if they are on their own but if it's s group is is scared. I purposely walk away from other dogs so it annoys me when owners let their dogs run up to us. Don't think there is much we can do about it. People won't change sadly

Original poster
Anewhope · 26/04/2018 11:26

I do the same @redtulip12 and try to anticipate which way round the field people are going so we don't cross paths, just to avoid stress.

OP posts:
FairfaxAikman · 26/04/2018 11:28

This boils my piss.
I have a nervous dog (thankfully non-reactive) and I cannot get thick owners to understand that it is downright rude.
I don't want strange people in my face so why should a dog have to tolerate it just because she is a dog.
It's not "just what dogs do", it's poor training. I don't care if he's just being friendly or wants to play, they don't know if mine is friendly and she doesn't want to play.
Their dog's wants do not override my dog's wants.

I've even been told that I shouldn't have mine in public, despite the fact she's either on a six inch off-lead heel or chasing a ball and completely ignoring all other dogs.

Baubletrouble43 · 26/04/2018 11:30

I also get fed up with this. Frantically it is actually bad dog etiquette and a sign of bad manners ( canine and human!) and poor training to allow a dog or dogs to approach and jump all over another dog or person. I can tell you (Frantically) are probably one of THOSE people.

FairfaxAikman · 26/04/2018 11:30

Oh and she's off lead because she's a) under control and b) less likely to react if she's off lead.
The idea that dogs are fair game if off lead is annoyingly common - but would you walk straight up to a strange human and stick your face in theirs? No, you'd have a proper introduction first.

Baubletrouble43 · 26/04/2018 11:31

I agree Fairfax. Sadly, rude ignorant people tend to have rude dogs.

jusdepamplemousse · 26/04/2018 11:33

OP I feel your pain - our dog is such a love, perfectly docile and lovely but not in any way interested in other dogs and people (he’s super obedient and has been trained to stay with us / go off for an explore but recall really well so think it’s just a natural extension that he thinks it’s none of his business). He is never aggresssive and just tries to ignore other dogs after a polite sniff but it’s stressful for him if there’s a lot / a really big one / their owner can’t or won’t call them away and they want to play - he just doesn’t.

I just walk away and call him - he comes always - and most other owners get if their dog is following them they really do have to intervene. Can be irritating when you’ve settled for a rest but not much else to be done as far as I can see. I do think however that dogs shouldn’t be allowed off lead outside of contained dog run free areas unless they have near perfect recall. Clearly others don’t agree...very frustrating. (Especially when it’s bloody dog walkers with about 6 out at once. Think a lot of owners would be shocked to see how their walkers operate.)

Ugh sorry. Just a rant really not much help!

nellieellie · 26/04/2018 11:33

I think there’s always an element of annoyance with other people’s dogs when you have a dog. I have one large breed intact male who is constantly being set upon by other people’s dogs (especially small ones), and a highly dog reactive rescue dog, who I keep on lead, avoid all dogs I see, and has a “no dogs” fluorescent harness. Off lead dogs will charge across fields at her triggering a response which puts all my training back to square one.
Explaining politely to people is generally effective though, and over a period of time, more and more people start to know to keep their dogs away.

FairfaxAikman · 26/04/2018 11:34

Tbh @Baubletrouble43 I'm pretty good at reading canine body language, I know when a dog is not a threat.
But some people assume that you are assuming their dog is aggressive.
Therefore I have recently adopted a strategy of intercepting and making a fuss of other dogs - this keeps them away from mine but at the same time shows the owner I have no issue with their dog.
I also have a YellowDog Uk bandana and slowly people are learning what it means.

user1471459936 · 26/04/2018 11:34

Large water pistol.

jusdepamplemousse · 26/04/2018 11:35

Following then not them

Ebeneser · 26/04/2018 11:35

Keep her on lead if she can't cope with other dogs. Most owners assume a dog off lead is friendly and ok to be approached

That's an incorrect assumption. I let my dog off the lead, but she doesn't like other dogs. If she's far enough away from other dogs I won't immediately put her on a lead (she doesn't run towards other dogs). However if those dogs then come up to her and the owner is too far away to call them back, then that's a problem. If I put my dog on a lead, the other dog will still come up to her, and she will go for them. If she's off the lead then it's 50/50 how she will react. Sometimes she will let them sniff her, other times she will snarl at them. If the other dog snarls back, then there's a problem and a potential fight. Sometimes the other dog just goes for her (I've had her on the lead and another dog has just run up and attacked her - this has happened 3 times now!).

People that just let their dogs run off towards other dogs piss me off.

harriethoyle · 26/04/2018 11:36

YANBU. Have you heard of the yellow dog code? Link below but basically dogs who need space wear a yellow tabard/bandana/ribbon to signal that - you can explain it to other dog owners even if they don't know and those in the know will (I hope) act on it and call their dogs away. I have a 3 legged spaniel, who is physically fragile and I find hollering at overly robust dogs usually causes the owner to call them back. I probably look like a crazed tiger dog mum but frankly, my dear, I don't give a damn!!

www.yellowdoguk.co.uk/

Original poster
Anewhope · 26/04/2018 11:37

I'm sorry this all happens to you guys too but glad it's not just me being silly. I worry all the time that one day she might get attacked. I would have no idea what to do, I'd want to intervene but it would be terrifying! Especially if I had my DD with me.

OP posts:
Original poster
Anewhope · 26/04/2018 11:38

That's really useful to know @harriethoyle thank you!

OP posts:
ColonelCakes · 26/04/2018 11:39

I think people are saying that putting your dog on a lead when others approach is a signal to their other dog’s owners to call their dog away. Rightly or wrongly, in this country a lot of owners assume dogs go to the park to romp with other dogs. You can complain this is unfair or you can try a simple signal to other owners that your dog isn’t happy with other dogs bothering them.

Merrykegs · 26/04/2018 11:41

Put her on a lead. Sorry but you aren't the only dog owner in the park. If the other dogs aren't being aggressive then you are being irritatingly precious.

Baubletrouble43 · 26/04/2018 11:43

No Merrykegs. Thats bullshit. Dogs off leads out and about should be called away when they are pestering other off lead dogs UNLESS they are invited to play. THEY aren't the only dog in the park, and its time their self absorbed owners realised that.