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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

To think that you don't just come into work and

90 replies

PearlClutchingOldie · 26/04/2018 10:19

get changed in the staff room in front of everyone? I mean, if you want to come into work in your own clothes, you should at least get changed in the toilets or something?

OP posts:
Oowatchasay · 26/04/2018 12:01

My mother in law has a huge towel that has elastic sewn in the top to make it into a loop so you can put it on over you to get changed at the beach without anyone seeing you! It's genius! I would probably steal it if I had to strip to my undies every day in front of colleagues. I'd hate it! Grin

Oowatchasay · 26/04/2018 12:02

I mean I don't ever wear matching undies for one and usually they're big granny pants

Littlechocola · 26/04/2018 12:04

@HollowTalk yes. If you all arrived at the same time at left at the same time you would need an awful lot of toilets to change in.

Male or female wouldn’t make a difference to me. I’m not proud of my body (if anything I have very low self esteem) but I’m not ashamed of it either. I change, I get on with it.

flowerslemonade · 26/04/2018 12:20

The thing is getting changed in toilets is horrible. The floor is often unclean, there's a san pro bin in there and a loo brush, they can often be tiny and cramped and you end up touching the walls. Not to mention if you have a rucksack, coat, there's no hook on the door facing you etc. So I can understand why people would rather do it in an open room. I wouldn't have a problem with it if it was obvious they were getting changed quickly and simply trying to get on with their day.

wanderings · 26/04/2018 12:31

Can't he do it when he gets to the place for the activity?
He says he sometimes arrives for the game only just in time (not his fault), so would ideally get changed as he travels to save time.

Original poster
PearlClutchingOldie · 26/04/2018 13:18

I'm a nurse and everyone gets changed in the locker room in front of everyone else. It's been like this every place I've worked.
In some jobs, though, its probably necessary and normal. And being a nurse, you probably have separate areas for men and women to get changed?

OP posts:
Original poster
PearlClutchingOldie · 26/04/2018 13:22

A furniture shop is not so normal. Why does she do it??
Exactly - not normal! She does it because I think she comes straight from college, so doesn't go home first.

OP posts:
kateandme · 26/04/2018 13:58

normal here.but then depends on how all others see the room function.is it just for staff break tea drink chat etc.or is it something no one else would think odd.the lockers beig in there to me suggests its not frowned upon usually.

earlybirdhasanap · 26/04/2018 14:05

Yes we do have separate areas.
Presumably you don't and this woman feels comfortable changing in the staff room. Some people aren't body conscious but if you find it makes you uncomfortable say something.
I'd rather quickly get changed in a room with space than in a toilet.

Biggles398 · 26/04/2018 14:10

I sometimes get changed at work, but always in the toilets, not the communal break area!

HannahHut · 26/04/2018 14:16

The toilets where I work have extra room with hooks and benches so there's plenty of room.

I just think he likes it. I don't really want to see a big hairy bloke in his underwear while I'm eating my break.

Ilovelblue · 26/04/2018 14:58

Years ago, I had a colleague who drove up on a Monday, stayed in the area all week then drove home on Friday afternoon. He used to get changed at his desk!! He wasn't exactly the Diet Coke man either. I complained. We often had clients in the office - bad enough when we witnessed it - but unacceptable for clients. I think I was seen as a prude for complaining but it just wasn't appropriate in our office.

inTIRFace · 26/04/2018 15:01

I wouldn't care but I think I'm probably more lax about this than most.

At the beach I go for speed over concealment.

theymademejoin · 26/04/2018 15:09

Changing in the toilet is gross. Your employer should provide somewhere for changing is they expect people to wear a uniform.

Ohyesiam · 26/04/2018 15:13

Could she be able that rare breed, a woman with no hang ups about her body?
Good for her

Andylion · 26/04/2018 15:32

Skivvies?? Underwear? In that case, she's not particularly showing anything,

I think context is important here. IMO, in a shared, male/female staff room, showing your underwear, is showing something.

Orangecake123 · 27/04/2018 07:41

At my hospital we have a locker room. I'm not complaining about seeing quiet a few young good looking doctors taking their shirts off. There are also two cubicles with curtains for the less brave (people like me).

LakieLady · 27/04/2018 08:27

The other morning, I walked into the IT office and the IT manager announced "Morning Lakie, just let me get my trousers off".

I was a bit Shock, until I realised he was talking about the waterproof overtrousers he wears on his motorbike.

I think it depends whether it's done in a show-offy "look at my fab bod" way, or just in a casual "need to get ready asap" way.

And changing in toilets is yuck.

Gwenhwyfar · 27/04/2018 09:26

I can't believe people think this is OK. I used to work somewhere where some men would change in offices. It made me very uncomfortable. It also meant the room smelt as the changing was usually after sport.

DuchyDuke · 27/04/2018 09:29

I have done many low paid, low perceived value jobs in my time; if they had a uniform it was considered acceptable to change in the staff room and men usually did do that. Kudos to this woman fof not following the herd to unhygiening toilet changing.

Gwenhwyfar · 27/04/2018 09:30

"Your employer should provide somewhere for changing is they expect people to wear a uniform."

Only if you're not allowed to come in in your uniform. If you are allowed, then it's your choice to get changed at work and you should do it in the toilets.

skoda62 · 27/04/2018 11:11

Where I once worked, few came by motorbike. A bikers changing room was provided, with only bikers having a key to the room. But I have worked in places where men and women had to use a locker room to get changed. Was a warehouse, and mucky job. So dirty clothes in the locker to change into. However, the ladies used the ladies toilet. Us guys didn't mind them having a peep at our Y fronts. In fact, more revealing men's cover-ups can be seen on most beaches.

Original poster
PearlClutchingOldie · 28/04/2018 22:04

If you are allowed, then it's your choice to get changed at work and you should do it in the toilets.
But I'm wondering if they should provide somewhere to change - some people don't have a choice, and may have to get changed at work

OP posts:
mrcharlie · 29/04/2018 08:30

Surely if management were made aware they would provide a proper changing room with a bench, mirror and hooks.

I'm more aghast at the management for not providing a proper solution.

All for profits eh'

MissMorkansAnnualDance · 29/04/2018 08:34

A definition of staff room is needed really.

We have 2 rooms available for staff- a room with our lockers in, and a room where we sit round a table during free periods.

It would be quite weird if a colleague stripped off in the latter, not the former, and in any case, I don't think I'd be bothered enough to start an AIBU about it.