To say YABU if you think Kate deserves no sympathy because 'she knew what she was getting into!'

[ChipperChapper]

It sounds like the sort of people use to say (and often still do), if a younger mother dared complain if she was drained - All because 'she knew what she was getting into' when she decided to have a baby, and that 'she knew the dad probably wouldn't stick around, she knew babies aren't dolls'

^The above is no reflection of all or even most young mums! I am one.

Anyway, moving on... Isn't it quite tactless and a bit lacking in compassion to say "She knew what she was getting into!"

I don't know her personally, but Will, and her three children, are just that to her. Not Royal figures for show.

I understand she may be feeling a million dollars, though. I suffered with HG and felt like going to the Ritz after my DC's birth. Sadly, I neglected to pack a dress and was quite disappointed I was going home in leggings and a top

I look at her and think, 'Not for all the tea in China would I be you, love.' The constant scrutiny would break me.

Yes, she chose, but no life is without its problems and no doubt there are days when the life she chose seems distinctly undesirable. Empathising with that doesn't render a person unable to recognise that those problems are on a very different scale to those experienced by others.

I hope she's very happy, and her life is undoubtedly very comfortable in many ways... but no. Not for all the tea in China.

"The constant scrutiny would break me"

Constant scrutiny? I'll put money on us not seeing her again for at least 3 months. Remind me again how many public engagements she does every year.......?

I'm struggling to come up with a reply I think because ultimately I'm not that interested , Iv never really been bothered by celebrities or royals they are just people

I personally wouldn't have wanted to have to glam up and stand Infront of the worlds press after dc

But then also I'm guessin she wouldn't have want to have had to come home and just crack on after an emergency c section because she is a single mum !

Who know what she thinks anyway ??

Meh!

They both have oodles of money and help and lovely homes and now three healthy children - i doubt she needs any sympathy at all. save that for people that are really struggling.

We also pay MPs, the House of Lords, and, if you like, we pay for May's £1000 trousers and Corbyn's holiday.

At least they are elected and can be sacked if they do not perform. Why should a random family (often with questionable morals) be head of state? How in any way is that appropriate in 2018?

The tourism thing is a huge myth. There would be very little impact on tourism if they were abolished. In fact Buckingham Palace could become a museum, taking millions every year. You don't see France and Germany moaning about lack of tourists do you? Who genuinely goes somewhere just because there is a monarchy? It's not like they ever get to meet the queen.

Kate and William actually do the bare minimum of public engagements. They insist on privacy the remainder of the time and the press gives them a LOT of leeway- it is largely controlled by them what goes out there. At least the Queen and Prince Philip actually work their arses off well into old age. William does significantly less than royals far further down the line of succession. They also seem to pick the fun events with celebs rather than the mundane ones. I have no issue with them wanting privacy, but y'know get a job and pay for your lifestyle yourself.

No doubt next time we see her she will be back in size eight as a guest at the wedding.

Agree with the sentiment but I've seen a size eight and that ain't it.

That photocall was part of the deal with the press and their media management strategy. They give the press full controlled access for prearranged photocalls in exchange for not being harassed. They didn't need to take the children in, they could easily have waited until the baby got home to meet him but seeing them brought in was part of the deal.

Personally I think they're handling the media very well. I worked in the communications industry for over 30 years, they're being well advised and have the sense to follow that advice.

"The constant scrutiny would break me"
Doesn't seem to do that lot any harm, in fact they seem to revel in it. Rather like celebs, who just love all the attention, only difference being celebs do it for the attention and the money, the royals get the money whatever they do. (literally thrown at them, with palaces too), it's certainly not a hard life.

Princess Margaret proved the point when she had the chance to marry "the love of her life" but stand down as a privileged royal or carry on the hugely lavish life she'd enjoyed all her life. We all know which she chose. .

Why would I feel sympathy for her having to do something she doesn’t necessarily want to? I have to do this every single day. I had to do loads of stuff just after giving birth, if I could have swapped all the general stuff for an hour or so of being tarted up and paraded for the cameras I probably would have.

I can empathise with not wanting to get up and just revel in baby snuggles but no, I don’t have sympathy for someone’s completely privileged life.

I don't think you can compare what was expected during the early decades of the Queens reign with what is/has come to be expected by the the press and public today.

The modern Royal Family knows that they're continued existence relies on how popular and relevant they remain to the public. The press feed the public either a negative or positive picture of them, and therefore have a lot of power. They also rely on the press to give coverage to their public engagements. Therefore many of their choices are about appeasing the press and meeting a public appetite. Choice is therefore extremely relative.

From observations of Kate in public both at the beginning of her engagement with William and since, she really isn't naturally gregarious in public, at the beginning she seemed distinctly uncomfortable. She has since learned how to handle attention well over the years, but she doesn't have an exhibitionist streak. Whereas Diana was happy to court the press much more, I can see her happily gojng along with the post birth step nonsense.

I'm willing to bet the tiny change I have in the bank that if K really had a choice, you'd see nothing, not even the edge of her heels as she got in the car. So I really dont think that they think they have a choice. They do it because they feel it has become expected of them.

their!

“They do it because they feel it has become expected of them.”

That is generally what having a job implies.

Kate and William actually do the bare minimum of public engagements

I basically agree with everything you’ve said, but I always feel that William & Kate are slightly unfairly shouted at (metaphorically) for the number of public engagements they do.

William has had another (albeit part-time) job so it’s fair enough, imo, that his royal job be part-time too. Apparently he’s now doing a Masters in something or other so he has some excuse. And, nannies aside, possibly Kate is trying to be as hands on with the children as she can, which obvs takes up a lot of her time. So there’s some justification....possibly.

Unlike Harry who does fewer engagements than anyone else and hasn’t troubled his arse with anything as boring as a job since he left the army. Flying the world in the service of his sex life seems to be all he’s interested in. Total waste of space.

To the poster who said William's comment about "thrice the problems" was "crass" - he actually said thrice the worry - and we ALL worry about our children. Changing it to "problems" and the comments PP made about that, gives it an entirely different meaning.

William has had another (albeit part-time) job so it’s fair enough, imo, that his royal job be part-time too.

He gave up the air ambulance job ages ago. I wasn't aware of another part time job.

Apparently he’s now doing a Masters in something or other so he has some excuse.

Do you mean the 10 week agriculture course he did in 2015 at Cambridge? I would think that is over now.

And, nannies aside, possibly Kate is trying to be as hands on with the children as she can, which obvs takes up a lot of her time. So there’s some justification...possibly.

Well, yeah, nannies aside being the operative phrase. She has nannies. Both kids go to nursery/school. I doubt she is rushed off her feet. And she manages to go to the cool events where she gets to meet David Beckham or Ed Sheeran or to Wimbledon. Oh and the small fact that they did very little before they had children as well.

I don’t think they really have any choice in what they do.

They have clearly decided to do these carefully controlled publicity appearances because they feel it is preferable to being hounded like Diana was. Appearing on the steps of the Lindo wing in high heels with her hair and makeup done with newborn babe in arms, smiling for the cameras, is the price she has agreed to pay in exchange for a tiny bit of privacy the rest of the time.

Someone mentioned the comfortable wedge heels she is often seen in - she’s actually never seen in them anymore. Don’t know whether this is true or not but I read somewhere that the reason she doesn’t wear them anymore is because the Queen thinks they’re vulgar and told her to stop wearing them.

Yes she knew she was getting into a relationship with / marrying the heir to the throne and she made that decision. And yes, having that much money undoubtedly makes your life easier in a lot of ways.

But plenty of people in the world have more money they can ever spend simply by being the child or spouse of an earl or a hedge fund manager or a Russian oligarch, and they have the freedom and privacy to do whatever the hell they like.

The royals have absolutely no freedom and limited privacy, and I wouldn’t want to be in their shoes for all the money in the world.

No...a Masters in something connected to his ambulance job. Doing it now...he said so just the other day.

Oh and the small fact that they did very little before they had children as well Yes, there is that.

Agree with howthelightgetsin

At least the Queen and Prince Philip actually work their arses off well into old age
Well i'd hardly call it "working their arses off", more like getting to do interesting things for free. If it was in any way arduous i'm certain they wouldn't be doing it. They can stand down any time they want, The fact they haven't stood down proves it imo.

We really are brainwashed in this country into thinking what the royals do is "work". That's an insult to those of us who do work. They do "engagements" Literally every single thing is prepared for them for before, during and after. No work involved whatsoever.

I’m sure Kate is doing just fine. She dated William for years before she got married, she would have been prepared for royal life. She also saw what happened to Princess Diana and chose to get married into royalty.

I’m sure Kate could have chosen to stay in the (private) hospital for a day or two but she had an easy birth so chose to go home. Many women who give birth on the NHS are made to leave 24 hours after a caesarian and have little help at home.

Kate has a full time nanny (perhaps another one too) a temporary maternity nurse to look after the newborn and at least one full time housekeeper. She will never have to worry about money or going back to work in an office/shop/factory/hospital.

at the poster who said she looked a lot plumper this time. Catty much. Woman has just had a baby and all you can think of is her size. Ffs where's the sisterhood

The irony is, it was the bloody OP who made this outlandishly catty comment! After starting a thread about how unreasonable it is not to have sympathy for Kate!

Giving birth is not a 'job' though is it Bertrand I guess you could argue the photo shoot is part of the job, but i'd argue that a woman's right to total privacy, before, during and after birth should trump employee obligations.

There's been a lot of discussion on MN on the importance of the physical, emotional and mental aspects of womens birth experiences, and how short modern maternity care falls of providing it, but we are still expecting women to publicly be displayed looking pretty before the worlds press hours after birth, bleeding loads and then she's got to smile too?

It is really peculiar how we behave with regard to the RF in this country.

We grovel before them, call them “Your Highness”, go into a frenzy over their bog-standard life events (like babies and marriages) then react with amazement when they turn into entitled narcissists who cart their own bog seats around the world with them,

What do we expect?

We they if they are not Royal figures for show? They aren't the head of state. The only reason they get to live in Kensington palace and never have to lift a finger they don't want to lift is because they are Royal figures for show.

Absolutely this.

She stood on the step for 5 minutes. Now, I'm sure she would have preferred not to, but it's a small price to pay for the meticulous care and attention she would have received throughout the pregnancy, birth and will receive in the recovery period. Save your sympathy for those who don't get that.

Also, she could have chosen slightly more casual clothes and shoes if she had wanted to. I'm sure no palace official would have insisted on the heels.

Ffs where's the sisterhood
Does Kate think about the sisterhood for all those poor women who have to go back to work soon after giving birth because unfortunately, unlike her no one is going to financially support her. Surely privileged royals aren't part of the "sisterhood".