to think this was incredibly rude?

[KirbyKane]

At work this morning and have just told people I'm pregnant. I'm 12 weeks and have a slight (very slight) bump. I am showing fairly early and put this down to having a late miscarriage some time back where I had developed a significant bump. Nobody at work knows this as I don't feel it is anybody's business.

Everyone was very happy to hear I was pregnant apart from one woman who seemed indifferent, which is fine! I really don't mind. However it has come to light that she has been making comments about me sticking my stomach out and wearing tight clothes to make my 'fake bump' more noticeable.

I am livid! First of all I am not so pathetic that I would stick my belly out 24/7 to make myself look 'more pregnant' and the clothes I am wearing are the same ones I wore before I was pregnant, so if you can see my bump... then so what? I'm pregnant and proud of it!

Would you let this slide? Or would you confront? It's upset me very much and made me feel like I need to justify myself.

Part of me wishes that my colleague never told me what she said but I guess she was only trying to help.

She sounds bitter and jealous.
Congratulations BTW

It says lots about her, and nothing at all about you. Her nastyness, rise above it.
Congratulations

Congratulations on your pregnancy.

Why would your colleague tell you this? How does this help you? I never understand why people gossip or stir to cause ill feeling between people.

It isn't worth mentioning really, let it go.

The colleague who told you is not trying to help, she is stirring.

Thank you @LoniceraJaponica - I'm so happy, it'll be my first baby but my fourth pregnancy, which is why I think I am showing so early. I just feel so self conscious after her comments and feel like hiding myself away in baggy shirts. I don't know why people can't just be happy for you!

I agree, I doubt the colleague’s motives were good in telling you.

Just try and forget about it. It’s not worth the stress.

Ignore. Your colleague shouldn’t have told you, she is trying to make trouble.

@Namechange2day @Stompythedinosaur if you knew her you'd realise that she is the type of person who feels guilty knowing something about someone and not telling them. She is not a gossip in the slightest and told me because she thought I should know, but is also incredibly young/naive. You're right though it wasn't helpful in the slightest.

Many Congratulations. If you can, just ignore the stupid comments and enjoy your pregnancy your colleague was out of order for informing you of the comments said.

Thanks everyone! Still feeling very self conscious about my 'fake bump' however

I’d have a word with the girl who told you and tell her that her comments should not have been passed on, it’s inappropriate and unnecessary. Young and naive is no excuse for being a bitch, I don’t think her motivation in telling you was good/honest.

Let it slide and just ignore it and focus on your own good news. She’s probably one of those people who don’t get a bump until late on (presuming she’s had children) who say ‘but the uterus is still behind the pubic bone until 12 weeks so it’s impossible. If its bump it’s all fat and wind.’
So what if it is? I’m like you, my stomach bloats up right away from weak stomach muscles and I have to wear maternity pants from very early on. It may be a ‘fake’ wind/intestine bump but it’s caused by pregnancy hormones!
Don’t let someone else’s negativity spoil your positivity, let it go and ignore :)

Many congratulations, OP.

You’ll always get some idiot who will say hurtful or nasty things. Just ignore and enjoy your pregnancy.

@Shizzlestix I've already told her not to tell me things like this in the future. She's a temp on experience and is only 16, has a lot to learn. I'm not going to hold it against her as I am more upset about the comments that were made and how they have made me feel! As much as they shouldn't have been revealed to me in the first place. Her telling me is a different issue and it has been dealt with thankfully.

Definitely ignore your colleague - as horrible as she is being, you don't know her back story. I can remember a friend acting very coldly towards me during my first pregnancy. Ends up she had recently lost a baby (after a lot of trouble trying to conceive). I didn't find this out until years later.

Huge congratulations to you and your OH....

Thanks everyone

Start wearing ‘baby on board’ -shirts, talk about your lovely maternity leave just to rub her nose in it!!

Congratulations be proud of your little bump

@Ansumpasty thank you! My last pregnancy I was flat as a pancake until 14 weeks but this time round it's a different story! Wind or baby, I don't care. It's there and I'm not sucking it in all day!

Congratulations. Maybe the woman in question has had her own fertility problems, her comments are not nice but let them go.

@backsackcraic maybe. She has 5 kids so would've thought she'd understand! She said you don't show this early in your first pregnancy, yet she doesn't know it's actually my fourth and I feel like I have to justify myself. Just hard that's all. Maybe I'm being too sensitive..

I would assume the woman making the comments has some issues of her own going on so just leave it and not bother confronting or saying anything to her. If anything, she is the one who is looming silly and at the end of the day you've got the thing you want the most so none of her comments matter in the grand scheme of things.

Congratulations Lovely 💐

I'm 17 weeks and one of my friends has been saying this about me for a few weeks too. I actually can't help it if it's sticking out as I'm just wearing my usual clothes (well the ones I can fit into anyway). It's really quite large and it's worried me a little in case it's just strange fat collection. But I didn't comment on what her body looked like in pregnancy so I'm unclear why she's doing the same to me. Ignore and rise above!

Firstly congratulations and good luck with your pregnancy
Try to remember that your colleague at least didn't say it to your face and it shouldn't have been passed on as the tone and context etc was missing. I certainly do not agree with what was said
I do think you may need to prepare yourself that people do comment quite bluntly about your size when your pregnant and its hard but you do need to judge ignore them

Congratuation on your pregnancy, no surprise you are over the moon after 4 miscarriages, however, you are taking this way too at heart. Not everyone is going to be as excited about it as you are. Also, if you are going by what a 16yo has been telling you, I wouldn't assume she has related what was said exactly. For all you know, what she said is 'you don't USUALLY show that early' and the part about you faking it might have been added by the imagination of the 16yo.

Let it go, not worth being livid about. For all you know, maybe she's just experienced a miscarriage and she's feeling a bit sensitive. You are being too sensitive and you don't need to justify yourself, but that's early pregnancy hormones for you.