To think it's rubbish that you can tell if someone is of Jewish descent?

[brentlondon]

I'm not talking about stereotypical features etc. as I'm pale and ginger with a very ordinary surname...

I have a very good (Jewish) friend who claims he can tell if someone who isn't Jewish has a Jewish background. Be that a Jewish grandmother or something. Without taking him too seriously I asked him whether it was some special power he possesses but he is adamant it's something he is able to do. He guessed it about me, or so he says.

A few years ago someone told me that it was very likely that I have some Jewish ancestry.

The other day I got chatting to a local reform rabbi by chance and we got talking about my background and history. I mentioned that I am of partly "Jewish" descent. He remarked that he "wasn't at all surprised".

AIBU to think this is rubbish and that you can't tell. I mean, I can take a guess if someone is of Irish descent but that's because of features and a surname. Surely this kind of thing is impossible and they're having me on?

Having lived in a foreign country for several years I can absolutely agree - I can pick out the British a mile off. Doesn't matter if they're black, white, or Asian, I just know. I think that humans are naturally clannish, and recognise those we share culture with.

Radical, me too! I correctly guess people as Brits all the time. It's the way they dress, the way they hold themselves, their faces, etc. Although it helps that 9 times out of 10, they're sat in a bar!

hotsouple - you'd be very welcome if you wanted to convert. :)

Not many people do, as it's frankly pretty hard work. But in my synagogue the current Chair is a convert and converts who genuinely are up for it will always be welcomed.

I'm another one with pretty good Jewdar and who is often mistaken for Spanish/Italian/Pakistani/Roma etc. The last of those is actually far more problematic than being identified as Jewish - the poor Roma get a load of shit. :(

I know a Hispanic woman (I'm in the US) who converted because she also felt a strong pull to the community and culture, not because she married in. My main concern is that I mostly want to convert because I love the culture and I like secular Judaisms approach to religion, but at my heart I'm an anti-theist and have little interest in living my life in devotion to "God." I feel like it might be insensitive for me to join a community because I like what could be a stereotype of their community and not because I actually want to practice an Abrahamic religion. Having read both old and new testament, and a bit of the Quran, I'm not keen on any of them. I worry I would offend for joining for nonreligious reasons.

I emailed my local Rabbi!

(I don't think you can join most religions if you don't believe in God, though surely?)

My mum converted. It's hard work. She converted to liberal Judaism, which is the 'lightest' going - she still went to a year of study classes, writing essays and going to Hebrew classes 3 times a week. She was far more learned about the religion than my father who was born Jewish. Judaism makes it very hard for people to convert - you have to really really want to.

According to tradition, a rabbi will turn a potential convert away three times before allowing him or her to begin the conversion process. The basic idea is that an observant Jewish lifestyle is a lot to take on, so when would-be converts ask multiple times, it shows their determination to make that commitment

I was raised Jewish but consider myself now a Jewish atheist - but it's not a proselytising religion, so the bar is raised very high for anyone who wants to convert

@xenia Yeah I would assume, and I probably won't. But I actually know my local rabbi, I'm from a small town, and I will talk to her about it.