Active discussions

Meet the Other Phone. A phone that grows with your child.

Meet the Other Phone.
A phone that grows with your child.

Buy now

Please or to access all these features

Talk
AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

To think that the bride's been cheeky here!

488 replies

whywhywhywhywhyyy · 15/04/2018 15:51

Alright, so there's a girl I met at uni who's now getting married. We're not close at all, but she's been very kind and invited me to her wedding. Evening only.

As the wedding is hours away, there's only one hotel close by with ridiculous rates, and I'd only be invited from 8:30pm anyway, I'm planning on not going. I went to go and click the 'sorry, can't make it' option on her RSPV website when I saw the ride share list on there.

I've been put down to drive (what appears to be) one of her elderly relatives from my hometown. Never offered this, have never met the elderly relative in question, haven't really spoken to the bride about the wedding at all Confused Messaged another friend who's been invited to evening early and is down on the list to rideshare with someone elderly, same thing with her!

I've never declined an invitation so fast. Not sure if I've been invited as a friend or because I've got a car and happen to be from the same place as her relative!

OP posts:
AcrossthePond55 · 15/04/2018 21:08

Looking forward to OP posting CF Bride's Vaguebook post "It's so hard when you learn you can't depend on your friends" and mucho "What's up, Hun?" replies.

Awrite · 15/04/2018 21:13

So the relative was evening only too?

And we're you expected to remain sober and drive her home?

And isn't 8.30pm rather late?

So many questions. So much cheeky fuckery.

Bellabutterfly2016 · 15/04/2018 21:17

I think the bride has a cheek and we'll done for declining!!!!
Absolutely outrageous

I mean, I know some people think gift lists appear greedy but car share lists without actually consulting the guests is a whole new level.

I would have done the same

We're just talking about our wedding in 2-3 years (date still to be set) and I would never dream of this and just mentioned it to my partner he's in shock that "carshare lists" Are even a thing!!!!

Zofloraqueen27 · 15/04/2018 21:19

I was once invited to a funeral of someone I had met only twice and had no contact with.

I was detailed to pick up someone I had never spoken to but received instructions where and when to pick them up.

As soon as the service was over the organiser of the funeral said to me “ I suppose you will be wanting to get back to work”.

It was clear my “passenger” was staying for the drinks party and a taxi would be arranged to take her home later. 🤨

DD43 · 15/04/2018 21:20

That is impressively cheeky. What a mean fecker you are not travelling hours and hours from home, and paying 3 figures for a hotel room, and driving some old lady down who you don't know from Adam, for someone you have shag-all to do with. Ba ha ha! PRICELESS. Grin

I would click DECLINE quicker than you could say 'do I have muppet written on my forehead.....'

WeirdyMcBeardy · 15/04/2018 21:20

So how long before she notices you have declined? Will she contact you do you think?

C0untDucku1a · 15/04/2018 21:21

This is actually hilarious.

mummmy2017 · 15/04/2018 21:35

At wheresmylift.com

Wow cheeky .

KimchiLaLa · 15/04/2018 21:37

How do you know it's her elderly relative? Can you see more than a name?

KimchiLaLa · 15/04/2018 21:39

A relative of mine once asked my dad if he could pick up her son from the airport in between my own wedding and the reception. Yes, she asked the father of the bride. My dad, who I am still annoyed at for this, said no but offered to pay for son's taxi!

Original poster
whywhywhywhywhyyy · 15/04/2018 22:20

To answer a few questions;

  1. (Admittedly very naice) Papercraft invite with the name of the website to RSVP on
  1. Website is also very naice. Has a page for RSVP, one with the schedule (so you know exactly how much you're not invited to), a nice big blurb about how laaaaahvley the one local hotel is (better be for £100+), all about the menu.... and the page about getting there with the ride share list. Gift registry has a 'check back soon' on it.
  1. I'm assuming it's a relative because she has the same surname as the bride.

Another mutual friend has been in contact. This girl is very close to CFB, works with her, sees her daily, and has been firmly wedged up her arse for years to be honest. She has only been invited to the evening, her wife has been invited to the full day and she is fuming. Asked if she knew about the whole lift share thing and she's agog at it all - CFB has made comments about how lovely it is that I have an electric car through in the past.

Have a feeling CFB is getting spoken to by this friend tomorrow.

OP posts:
Aeroflotgirl · 15/04/2018 22:26

Wow so rude of the CFB, what's wrong with a text, e mail, or messenger RSVP, do guests have to know how further up or down tge or King order they are🤔🤔🤔🤔

Weezol · 15/04/2018 22:27

If there's no HP sauce on toast as a starter choice I'd fuck it off if I were you.

Seriously though, I'm glad you said no straight off. Some of the threads where folk have been bamboozled into stuff like this are jaw dropping.

Aeroflotgirl · 15/04/2018 22:27

Pecking order.

Littlechocola · 15/04/2018 22:30

Wow

madeyemoodysmum · 15/04/2018 22:37

Brilliant thread. Love a CF Bride thread

SickofThomasTheTank · 15/04/2018 22:50

She invited a woman to the evening do and that woman's spouse to the FULL DAY?! I may be leaping to a conclusion prematurely here but...passive aggressive dig at their sexuality perhaps? (You said 'her wife' so presume a same sex marriage?) Certainly sounds like homophobia to me! X

AllRoadsLeadBackToRadley · 15/04/2018 23:19

GACF for sure...tell the bride you're arriving on a unicycle!

But I think the wedding website sounds like a good idea! A way of keeping track of RSVP's and shit, no?

Mind you, I keep an excel spreadsheet for three-hour cleaning plans, so I'm a planful weirdo! 😂

BackforGood · 15/04/2018 23:34

Now this is the kind of wedding thread I love on MN and not at all placemarking for an update Wink

CoolGirlsNeverGetAngry · 15/04/2018 23:40

With CFs like this I’m always curious about what the conversations are like with their significant others.

CFGroom: oh, your great aunty will need a lift. Should we book a minibus?
CFBride: No need, I’ll just stick a lift share list on the website.
CFGroom: seems reasonable

JakeBallardswife · 15/04/2018 23:42

Electric car, can I have a lift too?

dinosaurkisses · 15/04/2018 23:49

Wedding websites are getting a bit of a bad rap here- they’re great!

We didn’t have one but DSis did- mainly for people travelling from England to NI who needed flight and hotel options without having to trawl the Internet. Hers was purely informational though, they didn’t have a registry.

We did got one through for Dh’s Cousin's wedding and to be honest it’s great having all the details online without worrying about losing the invite.

Ivorbig1 · 15/04/2018 23:56

I’d be tempted to tell the bride you are driving up on your new motor bike.
You have made ageist assumption based on name. Lots of old names are the height of fashion.

Sweetpea55 · 16/04/2018 10:49

At my nieces wedding down south,,( we live in the East) we were asked to indicate on the website if we needed a lift to the reception.
Quite a few of us accepted.
Best man was a right tosser,,Was organising cars and getting people in them. There was about 10 of us left, I asked about lifts the remaining guests and he just replied, 'oh Iv got to go now,,you'll have to sort yourself out'
Que us trying to get a taxi in a strange town..Eventually we get to the reception venue ..my sister wondering where we were,,I was so angry,,,but was eventually soothed by Pimms and delicious canapes.

Winosaurus · 16/04/2018 10:56

When I read threads like these I almost feel admiration for the CFs sheer brass balls 😂

How can people be so socially unaware that they think this sort of behaviour is acceptable? It’s really funny