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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

AIBU to think our children and the parents of one were to blame.

60 replies

Aloneandscared25 · 13/04/2018 14:59

Hi all,
So our eldest DS ( 11 this month )
Has been away in residential this week.
We had a phone call this morning to say they him and 3 other boys were found to have been watching games of thrones and skins on one of the other boys tablets on somesort if Netflix based thing.

  • one of the other mums rand me immediately to discuss what steps we should take to complain this happened ( now it was her sons tablet and account )

AIBU to think she should take some responsibility and actually our sons to.
They were watching it at night time so when on their rooms.

OP posts:
GreatDuckCookery6211 · 13/04/2018 15:02

She's nuts.

MsMarvel · 13/04/2018 15:02

Why the fuck is she wanting to complain to the school for her son using the tablet she gave him, presumably to use...??

100% the boys (all of them) at fault, but also the stupid mother who provided ths tablet...

NeedForBlossom · 13/04/2018 15:02

I wouldn't be taking any responsibility for this - imo it's all on the person who brought the tablet.

Did the parent know it was being brought?

Original poster
Aloneandscared25 · 13/04/2018 15:02

Oh I’m so sorry for the typos my phone is completely cracked and my fat thumbs are not helping !

OP posts:
Original poster
Aloneandscared25 · 13/04/2018 15:05

Well she is saying until they get back no one knows who’s tablet it was but it wasn’t ours as his is here with me and also wasn’t our Netflix account because we checked the continue watching section and neither was on there.
He is the only other one to own a tablet so in theory it’s defianty his.
We will be talking to our own and discussing to him that he was in the wrong to have watched them.
She wants to put in a complaint though

OP posts:
melonribenia · 13/04/2018 15:11

What is she complaining about?

shouldprobablysaynothing · 13/04/2018 15:12

Why did the school phone to tell you this?

Is it the fact that someone has a tablet or is it the content of what they were watching? Sorry for asking but I don't watch either.

Could the school not just have waited until they were home?

LynetteScavo · 13/04/2018 15:19

Actually, I think the school have done the right thing to let you know now.

It might be chaos when kids are getting off the bus...you will want to be with your D.C., not having this dropped on you.( some parents will be more upset than others, I'd be a bit meh)

Personally I would be cross with the parent who didn't have a code on their Netflix account.

I wouldn't even be blaming their child, or mine.

StepAwayFromGoogle · 13/04/2018 15:20

Why on earth did the mother send her son away with his tablet anyway? Presumably he wasn't using it for schoolwork if none of the others had theirs, so what did she think he'd do with it? Cuddle it to sleep? Unless it's the content that she/the school are concerned with, in which case the parents should have put parental controls on it. 11 year olds will watch anything they can get their hands on given half the chance. Love that the Mum is trying to dodge any sort of responsibility...

paddlingwhenIshouldbeworking · 13/04/2018 15:21

Assuming these are year 6's not year 7's I can't imagine any school allows 11 year old children to take a tablet on a residential so someone's broken a rule. And teachers don't sleep in the room with the children so if a child has sneaked a tablet in then how are they supposed to know, until they see it being used.

Not saying parents are responsible if their child has taken it without their knowledge but the school absolutely aren't.

LynetteScavo · 13/04/2018 15:21

So YANBU.

All the children were silly for watching it, I don't think you should blame one more than the others.

Original poster
Aloneandscared25 · 13/04/2018 15:23

Sorry to not have been clear, they had rang us one because of the content that was watched more than the use of the tablet as they said it was something they would advice us to speak to them about.
I have a sick DD at home so he would be bought home by friends parents so wouldn’t have had the opportunity to speak to me at collection.
I think they wanted to pre warn us on the content they may have seen.

OP posts:
Original poster
Aloneandscared25 · 13/04/2018 15:24

In my opinion they have handled the situation well and both me and husband will be discussing with DS that he should not have been watching the content.

OP posts:
Original poster
Aloneandscared25 · 13/04/2018 15:27

Oh yes they are in year 6 although this wasn’t a school residential it was more like glorified camping in the holidays run by the local kind of scouts they attend.

OP posts:
ThereIsIron · 13/04/2018 15:28

Can you redo your post in english for a start

Original poster
Aloneandscared25 · 13/04/2018 15:29

I did apologise for the typing and explained that, I was using a very cracked screen.
Apologises for that.

OP posts:
Shockers · 13/04/2018 15:30

Rude.

jaimelannistersgoldenhand · 13/04/2018 15:30

I have an 11 year old (y7) who almost certainly doesn't know Skins so would realise what sort of content it was when it was too late. He knows Game of Thrones is very violent and full of nudity though.

Pumpkintopf · 13/04/2018 15:31

I'm not sure what she wants to complain about? That an adult wasn't on hand to stop them watching unsuitable content on a tablet she had sent, from an unlocked Netflix account, in the middle of the night when they were supposed to be asleep??

Great example of teaching your child they are not responsible for their own choices and behaviour..!

Butterymuffin · 13/04/2018 15:32

What does she intend to complain about? She will most likely have broken the rules by allowing her son to take the tablet. Our school doesn't allow them on residentials.

Original poster
Aloneandscared25 · 13/04/2018 15:33

That is exactly what I said to husband our DS wouldn’t have known what skins was but would have known about games of thrones.

OP posts:
BackforGood · 13/04/2018 15:33

You are completely correct.
the other Mum is bonkers.

Willow2017 · 13/04/2018 15:39

Dear school,
I would like to complain in the strongest terms about the issue you raised with me re my son watching GofT on his tablet.
1 just because i ignored the rules and sent his tablet with him and
2. Just because he had access to my Netflix account and

  1. Just because he snuck on the laptop at night to show off to his friends doesn't mean.....oh wait a minute, i will get back to you on this once i figure out how you are responsible for it and not me.
Sincerely Mrs I.Diot.
AuntLydia · 13/04/2018 15:41

School have done nothing wrong that I can see. It's up to her to set up her child's tablet in such a way that they can only access age appropriate stuff. What did she expect school to do exactly? Set up parental controls on all the kids gadgets? Stay awake all night to keep tabs on them?

GinIsIn · 13/04/2018 15:43

GoT isn’t on Netflix, so her DS has paid for them to watch it. If she has such low security settings that paid content doesn’t trigger an email alert then she’s an even bigger idiot.

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