Active discussions

Meet the Other Phone. Protection built in.

Meet the Other Phone.
Protection built in.

Buy now

Please or to access all these features

Talk
AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

AIBU to wonder why retired parents live in big houses and don't help family?

740 replies

Dojos · 12/04/2018 21:20

Not judging the choice but i can't help finding it odd that you can have two sets off grandparents living in and owning several properties and adult children both in full
Time work struggling to make ends meet.

Bright enough and big hearted enough to know inheritance is a gift not a right, and rightly so. I'm just curious how parents can sleep In 5 bedroom homes they don't need at night whilst their good steady grown up kids struggle a whole Gang into a 2 or 3 bed semi.

I guess that applies further - why do the elderly generation not downside and keep the lifecycle of a family home going?

OP posts:
Housesforkids · 12/04/2018 23:20

CherryChasingDotMuncher
Because the people that payed and worked for their house should get to that choice, if you are given social house if meant to be to fit societies need and and they didn't work or pay for that house so it should be made availble to a family.

Bluelady · 12/04/2018 23:20

Will you please stop banging on about immigrants, Houses? The causes of our current housing situation have been pointed out to you and they're nothing to do with immigration.

Where were all these cheap houses after the crash? Prices stagnated here, they didn't fall.

Bluelady · 12/04/2018 23:22

Social housing is to provide homes. Of course tge bloody tenants paid for them. They rent them, they're not free.

Housesforkids · 12/04/2018 23:23

Bluelady
If you removed all immigrants there would be plenty of housing stock for Britains and house prices would be lower.

Bluelady · 12/04/2018 23:23

Arrant nonsense.

InspMorse · 12/04/2018 23:25

Houses
Hmm Hmm Hmm
Not sure that immigration has much to do with the OP's AIBU. As for 'Brexit' solving anything... have another Hmm

CherryChasingDotMuncher · 12/04/2018 23:27

So should private tenants also live in the bare minimum house they can houses? If not why not? And families are not placed in social housing to meet the needs of society, the housing exists to meet the needs of families

LizzieDarcy1907 · 12/04/2018 23:27

When DH and I got married and had kids, we had no financial support from our parents. And whilst we help our DDs out with money fairly regularly, we don't intend to fully support them now they are all adults. They have their own choices to make and lives to lead.
For the first time in 20 years, we no longer have a mortgage and we have disposable income that we fully intend to enjoy ourselves, thanks all the same.

echt · 12/04/2018 23:27

www.vice.com/da/article/vdp7pa/we-asked-an-expert-what-would-happen-if-every-immigrant-left-the-uk

It's 2014 and not an in-depth analysis, but shows some of the effects of booting out all the immigrants.

CherryChasingDotMuncher · 12/04/2018 23:28

If you removed all immigrants there would be plenty of housing stock for Britains and house prices would be lower

And?

If you removed women, this would be the same

Or children

Or minimum wage earners

Or elderly people

Why stop at immigrants?

Bouledeneige · 12/04/2018 23:28

I'm guessing they've worked very hard all their lives, scrimped and saved to maintain their property and pay off mortgages and now think they are entitled to enjoy it.

What about you?

HolyShmoly · 12/04/2018 23:30

Houses - Brexit isn't actually going to do that. Well, a load of huge companies will move out of the UK and into the EU (Dublin's housing market is completely crackers at the moment, in part due to all the business and jobs moving there) and the well-paid, highly taxed migrants will move with them.
Brexit doesn't impact non-EU citizens.
EU citizens already living in the UK will get right to remain.
The jobs will go but the people won't.

And unless OPs parents are immigrants it doesn't matter a fuck either way in this thread.

GreenTulips · 12/04/2018 23:31

We have equity

I fully intend to downsize and share the equity so the kids have a deposit

I look forward to smaller heating bills and less housework and maintenance bills.

I'd be happy in a small 2 bed cottage, smaller garden for the dog.

Can t wait

counterpoint · 12/04/2018 23:32

I agree with OP. Family help each other. Especially correct to expect parents to help their kids no matter how old they are as they chose to bring them into the world. It's only natural.

Housesforkids · 12/04/2018 23:32

echt
Yes it would decrease house prices and sure like the 60's and 70's society would have to go back to a one income family and have more kids but you would now have the same opportunities as bommers did. Isn't that what you want though since you are complaining we had it so good.

CherryChasingDotMuncher · 12/04/2018 23:34

I have to say I get a bit bored reading the sweeping generalisation of pensioners allegedly 'scrimping and saving' - when in fact a lot of them will have had the luck of the draw that the house they bought for 2 years wages is worth 10 times the price when they came to sell it. Not so much hard work and scrimping, but sheer luck of their generation. That's not to say they shouldn't enjoy the money - they absolutely should, with no obligation to give any to anyone - but let's not pretend every pensioner worked down the mines 80 hours a week and ate bread and dripping for 40 years to be able to enjoy their 6-bed detached house in Surrey.

TammySwansonTwo · 12/04/2018 23:35

Nonsense - because it’s 5x the JOINT INCOME. That multiplier hasn’t changed for a long time, but the cost of housing clearly has.

Bluelady · 12/04/2018 23:35

Yup, let's kick out all the foreigners and get women barefoot, pregnant and back in the kitchen. The housing crisis sorted and houses sold for 4/9.

Are you really this stupid, Houses?

echt · 12/04/2018 23:35

echt Yes it would decrease house prices and sure like the 60's and 70's society would have to go back to a one income family and have more kids but you would now have the same opportunities as bommers did. Isn't that what you want though since you are complaining we had it so good*

What are you on about? Where have I complained that "we had it so good"?

Ditzyitzy · 12/04/2018 23:36

If you removed all immigrants there would be plenty of housing stock for Britains and house prices would be lower Hmm stop watching channel 5 ffs.

HolyShmoly · 12/04/2018 23:37

I think Houses is actually the OP and just trying to stir the pot in any way possible.

Tinkobell · 12/04/2018 23:37

Yup, sounds v bitter!

Loonoon · 12/04/2018 23:37

We have several properties. I would be reluctant to sell them and pass the cash on to my DC now as they are effectively our pensions and I don't know how much longer we will live. I am not 60 yet so I might have 40 odd years left. If I give away all my assets now I could end up struggling later on.

That being said there is money set aside to give DCs deposits on a property when they have salaries high enough to support a mortgage - but that will be in lieu of paying for their weddings.

TammySwansonTwo · 12/04/2018 23:38

*I'm guessing they've worked very hard all their lives, scrimped and saved to maintain their property and pay off mortgages and now think they are entitled to enjoy it.

What about you?*

Well most people my age that I know have worked insane hours their entire adult lives but can’t borrow enough to get a mortgage. They’ve scrimped and saved to pay rent, pay fees when they have to move, scrimped and saved for a 20-30% deposit that’s basically worthless because they don’t earn enough to borrow 70-80% of a property’s value.

How about you?

InspMorse · 12/04/2018 23:39

bommers ????

Swipe left for the next trending thread