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Court case tomorrow and Barrister not coming

102 replies

Divorcequestions · 11/04/2018 15:12

Posting here for traffic

Friend going through divorce she has suffered emotional and financial abuse as well as domestic violence and sexual assault.

Solicitor promised she would explain what the court proceedings would be about before she went on holiday last Friday and said she hadhired a female barrister. Friend because of the abuse cant speak to men.

Friend was yesterday diagnosed with PTSD and trauma she is also dyslexic and has had a brain injury caused by stbexh running her over and is permanently disabled .

She calls the solicitor at 2 pm today only to find out that the female barrister isn't coming to the court tomorrow so they have hired a male barrister.

Friend is in a state she doesn't know which way to turn.

Anyone know what she can do in this sort of situation. I think friend is near to collapse.

OP posts:
bellabasset · 11/04/2018 19:35

I wish your friend luck tomorrow.

I suggest you make a list of her disabilities and questions of anything she doesn't understand e.g.

PTSD diagnosed yesterday
Dyslexia
Brain injury caused by ex running her over and now disabled
Incidents of dv and sexual assault have resulted in inability to communicate and fear of the male sex

Handing a list to the barrister he can read in a few minutes will save time and give him a heads up on her fears

Divorcequestions · 11/04/2018 21:18

Thank you for all your help. Had a word with a friend who is an accountant and she said that a list of his out goings and incomings typed out is not a copy of his personal bank statements. And friend needs to see his business bank statements as well

OP posts:
Queenie8 · 11/04/2018 22:12

Your accountant friend is absolutely right.

Your friend also needs to take 12 months bank statements, payslips, property valuation, mortgage statement and her outgoings written down. All need to be original.

desperatehousewife2 · 11/04/2018 22:36

I don’t have advice but I wish your friend the very best of luck tomorrow! It sounds like she has been through hell. You sound like a great friend OP!

Whatiwishfor · 11/04/2018 22:50

With a friend like you, she will be fine. xxxx

Divorcequestions · 11/04/2018 23:28

I have just texted her the list you say she needs to take.
It is this sort of thing she needs help with. I don't think she had thought of those things to take.

It really should have been her solicitor telling her this not someone off the internet the night before the hearing.

OP posts:
Familylawsolicitor · 12/04/2018 07:32

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

Snowysky20009 · 12/04/2018 08:16

Just want to say good luck today OP for you both.

Also there are some real unsavoury posters on here. I won't say who because others have already pointed it out. But also comments about solicitors taking holidays- they are human too, they are parents too. If they delayed holidays because of a case they would never have annual leave!

Queenie8 · 12/04/2018 08:30

Good luck today 🤞. Be prepared for lots of waiting around, as you may not be the first case.

changingagain123 · 12/04/2018 09:07

Name changer here. I rarely post on this type of thread but feel I must here as quite a lot of misleading advice has been given and the OP's friend is in distress.

It seems that the hearing today is a First Appointment in financial proceedings associated with a divorce. The most important thing to tell your friend is that she WILL NOT be expected to speak in court and most certainly will not be examined by anybody in the witness box.

The purpose of the first appointment is to make sure that all the documentation that the parties must supply to the court has indeed been supplied. Form E is a substantial form and all sorts of documentation has to be attached. The husband will not be able to fill it in at court. If he is saying things like that, he may well be a certain type of gentleman who feels they will be able to ignore the judge and the court process and do what they want. He will be in for a surprise.

The reason there is a first appointment is so that both parties and the judge have a good handle on what the family resources are & what their individual needs are - both now and in the future. If there are children under 18, their needs will be very important. Your friend's disabilities will be taken into account. Bad conduct is not normally taken into account, but it may be where it has had a significant impact on the family finances. So the husband's gambling may be something that the court will consider. However, this must be raised by your friend's lawyers in the paperwork.

The next stage is known as the FDR, where the parties are encouraged to broker their own consent agreement, with the help of the judge. This will require the parties, or their lawyers, to talk to one another. Sometimes a first appointment can be used as an FDR, but not here as the documentation hasn't been provided. If an agreement can't be reached between them, a final hearing will be required and the likelihood is that she will have to give evidence at that stage. Of course, if the husband wants to be difficult, there may need to be further hearings to deal with outstanding matters.

Today, your friend's barrister will be concentrating on the information that needs to be provided by your friend and her husband and will be making representations about what is required, what is missing and what directions (instructions to the parties about what they need to do and by when) are necessary to get everyone ready for the next hearing - the FDR.

She will need to talk to the barrister if she wants to achieve the best outcome for herself at the end of the day. Please encourage her to do so. He will be used to dealing with women who are distressed.

I wish her the very best.

PumpkinPie2016 · 12/04/2018 09:20

Just read this thread and wanted to say I wish your friend and you all the very best today Flowers

She is a brave lady and you are an amazing friend Flowers

Queenie8 · 12/04/2018 17:38

How did you get on today OP? I've been thinking about you all day.

Divorcequestions · 12/04/2018 21:30

The Barrister was lovely and did put my friend at ease.
I went through things with him with my friend sitting next to me.

We discussed what friend wanted and then what stbexh wanted . Barrister going back and forth between the two parties. Although we tried to compromise no give or take was on offer.

Just glad it is over and now role on the next court date some time in the future

She was only in the court about 15 minutes. Friend had completed everything she needed to but stbexh and his representative got a strip torn off them and given the last chance to complete his form E and supply correct documentation.

There are a couple of things friends solicitor needs to arrange but it shouldn't concern friend too much.

Hopefully by the next court case things will be a lot clearer .

OP posts:
Butteredparsn1ps · 12/04/2018 21:35

Glad your friend was shown compassion by the Barrister. Good for her for getting through it and well done you OP for being there for her.

Notevilstepmother · 12/04/2018 21:40

It won’t look good for him if he doesn’t sort the form out.

Well done to both 9f you.

Queenie8 · 12/04/2018 21:43

It sounds like you had a good Barrister. Well done for supporting your friend, and well done her for getting through today, and taking everything necessary with you.

Fingers crossed the next hearing is soon, and the ex plays ball, although I think the judge has the option to rule in your friends favour if the ex doesn't comply with the documentation (I may be wrong, and things do change quickly and often in law).

UpstartCrow · 12/04/2018 21:45

Thank you for the update, I was thinking about your friend today. Its bad you had to do so much for her when she had a solicitor Flowers

dinosaursandtea · 12/04/2018 21:50

Is there a chance that she will have been told all this but, because of her difficulties, not taken it in before you got involved? I find it highly unlikely that a legal team would allow her to show up without everything she needs.

NameWithChange · 12/04/2018 21:56

Apologies - late to this thread.

Just wanted to say well done for being such a fab friend OP. I have been in a similar situation re Court and I can tell you, you really find out who your friends are.

For what it's worth she may want to consider a different solicitor? The issue with the female barrister was possible unforeseen and impossible to change. But your friend really should have been more supported by her solicitor and all requirements made clear before she went off on holiday.

I hope your friend feels better now today is over. She sounds like she had had an awful time - the end is in sight!

Divorcequestions · 12/04/2018 22:39

Thank you for all your help.

Friend hopefully will be a lot calmer for a little while. She doesn't have to get stuff together or come up with the evidence disputing her stbexh's claims.

OP posts:
bellabasset · 12/04/2018 22:45

I am glad your friend did not find it as stressful as she had feared and that you were able to go with her.

Its very unsettling when you have a divorce or a personal matter that goes to court.

FASH84 · 12/04/2018 23:06

She's entitled to an IDVA, police 101 or local women's aid will have details

FASH84 · 12/04/2018 23:17

Sorry caught up, didn't realise it was civil and had happened. Glad it went as well as possible in the circumstances

ShinyShooney · 12/04/2018 23:20

Did she feel comfortable with the barrister or will she be requesting a different one for next time?

Laquila · 12/04/2018 23:29

Well done OP - you’re a good friend.

Why on earth some people find it so hard to understand that other people have different life experiences to them/are unable to manage situations in the same manner is a mystery to me.